Synchronized Sleeping — The New Olympic Sport

humorous-069_smallFinally, an Olympic event in which I could compete.

Synchronized sleeping is a sport that the United States should aggressively pursue. American couch potatoes can clearly sleep away the competition if we are only given a chance. The permanent dip in my living room couch is a testament to my rigorous training program and commitment to the purity of the synchronized sleeping sport. It takes years to perfect low breathing, regular snoring, and the cutting edge “double loaf with a back flip when reclining position.” I can sleep Nadia Elena Comăneci under the table and roll over Mary Lou Retton with a yawn. Stay tuned and see you in London.

25 thoughts on “Synchronized Sleeping — The New Olympic Sport

  1. Now that’s a sport I can really get behind. And if mixed human/dog teams are permitted, I nominate my father and his dog to the Olympic team.

  2. For Christ sake,
    The trolls can’t even stay away for these light hearted,good feeling threads! Korn, you and the rest of your trolls lead a very sad existence.

  3. In the great southwestern USA where I live, there are Indian ‘sleeping circles’ composed of malapai stones (black basalt boulders) and this photo brings an altogether new meaning to sleeping circles composed of black living objects.

  4. rafflaw,

    Did you blink during the brief existence of the “Half Hour News Hour”, which featured the commedy stylings of chuckle-boxes such as Ann Coulter and Rush Limbaugh? These are people who watch Caddy Shack and think their suppose to cheering for Judge Schmeils. Give a troll a break if he wants to glom on to some left-wing giggles from time to time. God knows he’s not going to find anything funny at Townhall.com.

  5. Trolls:”Do not feed the trolls” and its abbreviation DNFTT redirect here. For the Wikipedia essay, see “What is a troll?”. For other uses see Troll (disambiguation).

    An Internet troll, or simply troll in Internet slang, is someone who posts controversial, inflammatory, irrelevant or off-topic messages in an online community, such as an online discussion forum or chat room, with the primary intent of provoking other users into an emotional response[1] or to generally disrupt normal on-topic discussion.[2]

    Korn: Korn . . . deal[ing] with teen angst and other everyday issues … Like I said

    DDFTT

  6. PORT-OF-SPAIN, Trinidad — President Obama said he’s “gravely concerned” about the safety and well-being of jailed U.S. journalist Roxana Saberi and is calling for her release from an Iranian prison.

    Disenchanted Obama administration officials prvately said Obama is willing to give Iran more freedom to develop their nuclear weapon program if Iran agrres to release the jailed journalist personally to an Obama representative for a photo which Obama can then use to demonstrate his rolling over for every two bit thug is paying off.

  7. Obama on Chavez’s gift of an anti-American book: “I think it was a nice gesture”

    No, it wasn’t a “nice gesture,” as The One very well knows.

    It was a cheap stunt designed to put him on the spot so that Chavez can crow when he gets home about having confronted los Yanquis with evidence of their imperialist crimes.

    Obama can’t call him out, though, lest our precious nascent “dialogue” with Venezuela be jeopardized, so he’s forced to swallow hard and play the stooge.

    Good work, Barry. Note too the vague, politic rhetoric to describe Chavez’s long history of evil clownishness. If you’re not sure what he means by “interference” that’s a “source of concern,” let me spell it out: He’s talking about funding Marxist terrorists who’ve held Americans hostage for years on end. Mentioning that might spoil the dialogue, too.

    As for his point that talking to Venezuela doesn’t hurt American strategic interests, we’ll have to see how the detente plays in South America, which will be poorly.

    It’s not a question of jeopardizing national security, it’s a question of conferring legitimacy upon a cretin who, in a just world, would be radioactively illegitimate. If Obama’s going to do that, the least he can do is not play dumb about it!

  8. Hey Trolls get a life ok! You may not like what anyone does or says that disagrees with you. But can you really say that you are better off this past 6 years?

    Is your bank account larger, do you live in a bigger house that you paid cash for, do you get to go on vacation and pay cash, using only your debit cards?

    Do you drive an American made vehicle that you do not think that America should help out but it is ok to get all sorts of money to banks?

    Are you aware that AIG nearly bankrupted the world? Are you aware that CitiBank transfer 54 Bil to an offshore account in December 07? Do you care?

    Can you think for yourself?

    Are you a single issue Voter?

    Do you like smoke and mirrors?

    Can you say RWR?

    I know a lot of you cannot stomach the ideal of Reagan being talked about.

    You know what Communism works well in Theory, Practice another issue.

    Hilter had his supports too. He was the master of propaganda. You should have been only so lucky to have alive in that era.

    You probably think that Herbert Hoover was misunderstood.

    You probably think that FDR was too involved in Governmental Regulation(s).

    He was from an extremely wealthy family.

    Guess what some of the richest men ever have been since 1911 have been Democrats.

    Can you stomach that ideal. Even Bill Gates is one, Warren Buffett sides with Democrats too. What does that tell you.

  9. cresent moon:

    “I see the EVIL CLOWN Hugo Chavez has a new buddy – Barack Obama.”

    ***********

    Well EVIL CLOWN seems a bit harsh. After all he saw through and hate “W” before it was fashionable. Let’s call him a prescient clown. He did get more oil to the poor in our Country than did “W” too.

  10. Back to topic.

    “Finally, an Olympic event in which I could compete.”

    *****************

    Well, not me. I refuse to lay down with or near any Republicans. The fleas are dreadful, and look like Coulter and Hannity. For those seeking a reversal, my mind is made up. To quote Susan Boyle, “But there are dreams that cannot be, and there are storms [even I] cannot weather.”

  11. Seamus,
    What was I thinking?! Even a troll needs to have some fun. He should just do it somewhere else. I hear Politico.com has an opening for a troll who does not worry about the facts.

  12. Jill.

    No need to make a distinction between dogs and people. Dogs are people and my dog would be very insulted if she knew you excluded her from the category of people.

  13. Synchronized sleeping, huh?

    Some would call that living…

    And yes, the American dreamers win, cuz you have to be asleep to believe it (George Carlin).

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