We just explored the Orwellian Chinese campaign against “fake journalists.” Now, we have a story that would make Big Brother blush. China has long opposed the Nobel Peace Prize because of its recognition of people the regime has oppressed like imprisoned dissident Liu Xiaobo. China therefore offers the alternative and laughable Confucius Peace Prize. The regime just announced its 2011 winner of the man who inspires millions with his image and message of peace: Russian Prime Minister Vladimir Putin. Putin celebrated the news recently by bragging that he can destroy America in 30 minutes. Mother Teresa is lucky she did not have this competition when she lived.
The ceremony will be held on December 9th in Beijing, an event that has already triggered a rush on tickets by people like Castro and Mugabe. The prize comes with $15,000 in cash and a free tour of a Chinese jail for journalists and dissidents.
Of course, jealous leaders are likely to say that this is a faux prize that has even less substance than the recently admitted staging of Putin discovering ancient artifacts. Moreover, China can point out that Barack Obama was given the Nobel Prize with just a few days in office, no accomplishments as President or a U.S. Senator, and proceeded to strip citizens of civil liberties and started a new war. The fact that Putin has called for beating down protesters while reestablishing a Russian police state fits neatly into the Chinese definition of a humanitarian. After all, Mao’s cultural revolution had the word “culture” in it. What can be more uplifting?
So, here is a heart congratulations to Vladimir Putin — the world’s new humanitarian.