First it was Hope and Crosby, then Rowan and Martin, and now the straight-laced conservative crowd at CPAC (The Conservative Political Action Conference) has its own custom-made comedic duo. Facing a chorus of boos and cheers former Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld teamed up once again with straight man (and former VP) Dick Cheney for CPAC’s “Defender of the Constitution Award” to entertain the assembled horde of Brooks Brothers clad “real men” — and a few women, too. Rumsfeld was not fazed by a few jeers at the mention of his name, and Dick Cheney was positively giddy when attendees yelled, “”Where Bin Laden at?” and “Show us the shackles Dick.” Cheney quipped in reply,” Alright, sit down and shut up.” What a card? Predictably those few dissidents (probably illegal immigrants) were drowned out by the ringing, obligatory chorus of “U.S.A,” U.S.A.”! Good enough for a hockey game; good enough for the CPAC patriots. (Oops, hockey’s Canadian– make that football, damnit) Boy, was Samuel Johnson ever right.
The evening was riotously funny, and almost perfect. In fact, the only joke left hanging was just which constitution Rumsfeld and Cheney et als were “defending.” I am told dinner consisted of crow with a side of irony.
