Vampires! Colorado Woman Crashes in an Encounter With the Undead
jonathanturley
Now, this is a road danger that few Driver’s Ed class prepare you for. A woman in Fruita, Colorado crashed into a canal. Police ruled out alcohol. The cause? Vampires.
The woman told her husband and police that see was driving in Fruita when a vampire suddenly appeared in the middle of the road. She threw the car in reverse and ended up in the canal.
Hopefully, the police will have her add a bumper sticker warning “I Break for Vampires.”
I would love to be present for the insurance call with the bored claims specialist:
“It was a vampire I tell you!”
“Yes, we understand. Was the undead a Bela Lugosi vampire or more of a Gary Oldman vampire?”
“What does it matter? It was a vampire!”
“Madam, for insurance purposes we need to properly classify your vampire. Your are not covered for certain vampires like Nosferatu vampires which are slow moving and easy to evade. You also have a high deductible on Christopher Lee vampires which are highly selective and often simply lurk. Now, would you say the vampire was moving toward you or you were moving toward the vampire? Did you have the recommended car vampire kit with garlic, wooden stake, and mallet? . . . ”
At least she did not face Nazi Zombies (thanks Nal for this video):
