Putin’s Pike: Vlad’s Latest Fish Story Leaves Russians Laughing
jonathanturley
In his embarrassing quest to become something of a Russian action figure, Vladimir Putin has been featured a race car driver, great white hunter, jet pilot, oceanologist, martial artist and Hell’s Angel. During one such stunt Putin was shown as a scuba diver where he retrieved perfectly preserved ancient jars from the Ocean floor. His aides swore to a skeptical public that nothing was staged. Of course, it was shown later that the whole thing was staged. Now, aides are wondering why no one seems to believe them that Putin caught a record-setting pike. Professional fisherman cried foul at the latest Putin fish story.
Putin’s people insisted the pike was over 46 pounds. The weight was important because Russian Defense Minister Sergei Shoigu committed the infraction of pulling in a large pike while fishing with Putin. Since that pike was estimated at between 26.4 to 33 pounds, no one was surprised when Putin had to pull in an even bigger pike.
Fear not, his aides (you know those aides who admitted that they lied to the public earlier about the planted ancient vases) insist that they personally saw the pike weighed.
