Bar Medical Clinic Shutdown: “Doctor” Has a Lot To Get Off Chest

Kristina Ross, 37, is the kind of person city officials love to hate. Determined, driven, and passionate about her desire to do something good for women’s bodies in spite of  red tape, Ross now sits in a Boise, Idaho jail for undertaking a task usually reserved for men in their twenty’s. Ross, it seems, has taken the health care crisis into her own hands and decided to bring medical exams to the masses. The only problem is that her impromptu breast exams in local bars were not sanctioned by the Idaho Department of Health which has this archaic requirement that healthcare professionals actually be licensed to do what they do. As a result Ross is charged with two felonies for impersonating a physician. Police say Ross introduced herself to her two “patients” as Dr. Berlyn Aussieahshowna, a plastic surgeon, and then examined the women, ultimately asking them to call to confirm appointments for breast augmentation surgery the following day. When real plastic surgeons kept getting unsolicited calls, police were alerted.

Stranger than the crime itself is that Ross’ gender may yet still be up  for grabs (pun clearly intended). According to police records, a Kristoffer Jon Ross was arrested for shoplifting this past Spring and “he” bears an uncanny resemblance to “she.” Police plan to get to the bottom of the Kristina/Kristoffer question using an exam by a real physician.

Source: Yahoo News
–Mark Esposito, Guest Blogger

38 thoughts on “Bar Medical Clinic Shutdown: “Doctor” Has a Lot To Get Off Chest”

  1. BBB:

    I believe you mean West Virginia, in Idaho the men sing the Horst Wessel Lied and barbecure the sheep.

  2. Boise, Idaho … the men may be inventive but the women are … oh, never mind … I’m trying to channel Elaine’s Muse and it’s just not working …

  3. now we know:

    ““he” bears an uncanny resemblance to “she.” Police plan to get to the bottom of the Kristina/Kristoffer question using an exam by a real physician.”

    “A woman who apparently used to be a man pretended to be a plastic surgeon so that she could carry out breast exams of strangers in a bar. Kristina Ross, 37, fooled the women with her medical jargon, probably picked up during her own breast augmentation procedures required for her sex change.”

    “Prospective patients also called the police. After one of the women who had tried to contact Dr. Aussieahshowna was interviewed by the police, Ross was arrested. The woman told police she had had had an initial evaluation of her breasts in a bar, and then called a number and became suspicious.”

    You think?

  4. I have dedicated a large portion of my life to inspecting the female body. My lifelong association with the FBI (female body inspectors), along with numerous related studies (Penthouse Forum) indicate that, outside of established medical facilities, night clubs and bars are reliable sources for those endeavoring to perform a “breast exam” (is that plural?).

    Though I have, on occasion, successfully performed “the exam” while in a bar, I was unable to figure out how to market it as a regular service. To that, I have to give Ross a tip of the hat.

    As we have done with computer hackers in the past, maybe it would be a good idea to place Mr/Ms. Ross in a position where his or her talents and personal motivation would serve the common good. Ross should be reassigned as a TSA Groper.

  5. Mespo727272:

    If Christians were placing bombs in their luggage and on their person, it would be a good idea to search them.

    During the second World War it would have been a good idea to search Italians and Japanese coming from Japan and Italy as well as Germans coming from Germany.

    We are at war with a certain element of Islam. I am sorry if all Muslims are painted with that brush. If they dont like it, let them take care of the radical element within their religion.

    So what is your point? That latter day Muslim terrorists are morally equivalent to Jews in Nazi Germany? That’s a great comparison to make. If I remember my history correctly, Jews did not start off bombing German buildings. They were persecuted for just being Jews for no other reason than being successful. There is a huge difference.

  6. Mo:

    “how you take care of this is to strip search Muslims and not give a care about what they think. ”


    Any other group to you care to pick on. How about Christians? Their extremists bomb abortion clinics. Let’s not forget that the ultra right-wing was responsible for bombing the Murrah Federal Building. Let’s strip search by political affiliation, too.

    Careful about guilt by association and demonizing people for it. The last book on that was written in German. Hey, maybe we should strip search them, too, and the Japanese, Italians, …. The list is endless. We can exclude only Mo, since he’s a demonstrated patriot. Don’t know about Bud, he sounds suspicious to me.

  7. Bud:

    Saudi Arabia should be a sand dune with some goats, we should re-nationalize the oil business they nationalized in the 50’s and throw the king goat herder and his princes out on their asses. They are nothing but trash with money.

    But then we made them what they are, so we have some blame in this. If we had pushed back when they nationalized our oil companies and put the boot on them then, we wouldn’t have this problem now.

  8. Mo,

    Good point.

    But, some believe these procedures are only in place to control the population, and not find terrorists because they have moved onto other ideals.

    These Muslim terrorists were from Saudia Arabia. Have we severed ties with Saudia Arabia yet…

    No I don’t think so..

  9. Bud:

    how you take care of this is to strip search Muslims and not give a care about what they think.

    Lets look at the people actually doing the bombing and leave granny and the 3 year old alone.

    They have caused enough mischief around the world, time for them to be inconvenienced and leave the rest of us alone.

  10. If I’d only known it was that easy….but then if you give the real Dr. out then I guess you can be counted an in…..mate with sometimes unrelenting dates….

  11. And how is Kristina any different than the thousands of TSA personnel that love rub my genitalia because I refuse a backscatter xray…

    At least Kristina isn’t doing it to three year old girls…

  12. “Who – without copious amounts of alcohol – would have thought “Berlyn Aussieahshowna” was a real name?”


    Well, Dr. Danzig Kiwiahsho’nuff, to name just one.

  13. “Dr. Michael Hfuhruhurr”


    ROFLMAO. Now,Buddha, go to your room.

  14. Who – without copious amounts of alcohol – would have thought “Berlyn Aussieahshowna” was a real name? Those ladies should have gone to see a reputable doctor like Dr. Michael Hfuhruhurr. I’ll also have to give credit where it is due. I’m a real smooth talker but I could never make the “free breast exam” pick up line work.

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