Mummy Told You To Check Your Prostate: Scientists Find Oldest Cancer

It appears that regular prostate checks were not common 2,250 years ago. Scientists have announced that they have found the oldest case of prostate cancer in a Ptolemaic mummy through high-powered digital imaging.

The man likely died a slow and painful death from the disease given the pattern of round and dense tumors between its pelvis and lumbar spine.

The man was 5’5” and between 51 and 60 years old, according to the article in the International Journal of Paleopathology.

The Ptolemaic dynasty was a Greek royal family which ruled Egypt during the Hellenistic period from 305 BC to 30 BC.

Of course, the general inactivity of mummies could be the problem. Another report out this week reports that inactivity increases the likelihood of cancer. As many as 100,000 new cases of breast cancer and colon cancer per year were associated with physical inactivity. In addition to 30 minutes minimum of exercise a week, the report recommends getting up and walking around every 60 minutes as well as other tips.

Source: Daily Mail

7 thoughts on “Mummy Told You To Check Your Prostate: Scientists Find Oldest Cancer”

  1. Using a sophisticated mixture of stem cells and magical scripts the patient will be reanimated. His head will then be removed for cryogenic storage, when, 1000 years in the future, they have the cure for prostate cancer.

    In the meantime, it will turn out the the magical script also included an unknown clause which causes the universe to collapse into a white hole. All of this will occur before Dec. 12, 2012, causing scientists to reevaluate the accuracy of the Mayan calendar.

    People working at the LHC will try to occupy it because they wanted to be the people who destroyed the universe and disprove the accuracy of the Mayan calendar. Police will move in on the protesters using radioactive xenon gas from Japan, smuggled in by IRAN! The US and Israel will trot out the new and improved Curveball to prove this is exactly what happened and now we desperately need to bomb Iran.

    John McCain will file a lawsuit for copyright protection because he was the one who originally came up with the hit single: “Bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb Iran”. He will prevail in court but Obama will go ahead and use the song anyway because he doesn’t really believe in the rule of law anyway!

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