13 thoughts on “Am I Late For The Rapture?”

  1. (Just caught this goodie on the net. Enjoy and share it.)

    PRETRIB RAPTURE DISCOVERY !

    BREAKING NEWS: Intensive and extensive and expensive and even pensive research has just discovered that the well-known pretribulation rapture is really and actually a SEVEN-stage coming. For proof look closely at I Thess. 4:13-18:
    (1) The Lord descends.
    (2) The shout.
    (3) The archangel’s voice.
    (4) The trumpet of God.
    (5) The dead rise.
    (6) The caught up (rapture).
    (7) The meeting in the air.
    Right here you can add gasps, shortness of breath, and clutching your heart. Yes, it’s true – seven (count them) stages. BTW, the following pretrib traffickers don’t know yet about this new discovery: Crouch, Hagee, Hindson, Ice, Jeffrey, Jeremiah, LaHaye, Lindsey, Lutzer, Markell, Missler, Stanley, Strandberg, and Van Impe.
    If rapture discoveries are new to you, Google articles like “The Unoriginal John Darby,” “The Real Manuel Lacunza,” “Deceiving and Being Deceived” by D.M., “X-Raying Margaret,” “Edward Irving is Unnerving,” “Walvoord Melts Ice,” “Thomas Ice (Bloopers),” “Pretrib Rapture Dishonesty,” “Pretrib Rapture Secrets,” “Thieves’ Marketing,” “Appendix F: Thou Shalt Not Steal,” “Pretrib Hypocrisy,” “Pretrib Rapture Secrecy,” “Pretrib Rapture Politics,” and “Famous Rapture Watchers – Addendum” – most of these by the author of “The Rapture Plot” (the highest endorsed and most accurate book on the long hidden origin and early development of the 182-year-old pretribulation rapture theory).
    For more info on the exciting seven-stage rapture, Google Joe Ortiz’s “End Times Passover” blog (Oct. 19, 2012) which can out-blog any blog that knows how to blog!

  2. Dear Congressman Peter King,

    I just saw 3 men flying around New York City without airplanes. I think they are from Iran. I am very frightened. Is it O.K. if I kill them? I have lots of guns.

    Sincerely,

    A Loyal Republican.

    God Bless America.

  3. Cool videos. The rapture doctrine,fly-away any moment teachings are bogus and definetly not biblical. It started in the early 1830’s with comments from a mentally ill woman. Margaret McDonald was her name. A couple preachers heard it and decided it would get people excited with the idea of flying into the clouds to meet Jesus. It’s possible the preachers had motives to line their pockets with money while getting people to jump on board and join their churches. The “rapture lie” has exploded throughout most of the Christian churches and Seminary Schools. It brings in the big bucks and leads people into a false hope of escaping from tribulation that is soon to come upon the earth. Hence the Left Behind series of books and movies.

  4. I’ve said it before, The rapture was in May. I guess its hard to remember because nobody disappeared ‘cept that little old lady in Iowa. There’s still a silver alert out on her.

  5. Outstanding! From a distance and at the right angle (at1:04) they look “real”. I want my jet-pack!!! I want my flying car!!!

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