You Have The Right To Remain Silent: Man’s Flatulence Forces Police To End Interrogation

15383038_GDefense counsel often struggle with clients who fail to demand a lawyer in interrogation.  Sean Sykes Jr. however appears to have shutdown his interrogation without uttering a sound . . . well at least a word.  Police say that they were forced to terminate their interrogation by Sykes’ continual flatulence.  He is no doubt now in production to star in the sequel series to “Breaking Bad” called “Breaking Wind.”

Detective say that when they asked for his address, Sykes, 24, “leaned to one side of his chair and released a loud fart before answering.”  He “continued to be flatulent” until the detective fled the interrogation room.

Sykes’ gaseous response however did not forestall the criminal charges of  being a felon in possession of three firearms and possession with intent to sell cocaine.

It is not clear what lucky public defender has been assigned this case.

45 thoughts on “You Have The Right To Remain Silent: Man’s Flatulence Forces Police To End Interrogation”

  1. I am so glad that the erudite, professorial JT continues to give deep coverage to the critical, vital issues of the day affecting our lives, whether it be the anal salutes from within the bowels of society, the back door breezes from our esteemed Leftist campuses, or the trouser trumpets emanating from the upper intestinal regions of the Beltway.

    Far better and worthier to do that than to exposes the perfidies rotting at the core of our government and the judiciary wings of the Military Industrial Complex.

    So, please let the gas continue. This too shall pass.

  2. Maybe this poor guy needs to see a doctor much more than the cops need to see him.

  3. A fart is a fart.
    Is a fart all the way.
    From the first cop in the room..
    To your last dying day.

  4. You do not have a right to remain silent but deadly.

    RCW 70.74.310

    Gas bombs, explosives, stink bombs, etc.

    Any person other than a lawfully constituted peace officer of this state who shall deposit, leave, place, spray, scatter, spread, or throw in any building, or any place, or who shall counsel, aid, assist, encourage, incite, or direct any other person or persons to deposit, leave, place, spray, scatter, spread, or throw, in any building or place, or who shall have in his or her possession for the purpose of, and with the intent of depositing, leaving, placing, spraying, scattering, spreading, or throwing, in any building or place, or of counseling, aiding, assisting, encouraging, inciting, or directing any other person or persons to deposit, leave, place, spray, scatter, spread, or throw, any stink bomb, stink paint, tear bomb, tear shell, explosive, or flame-producing device, or any other device, material, chemical, or substance, which, when exploded or opened, or without such exploding or opening, by reason of its offensive and pungent odor, does or will annoy, injure, endanger, or inconvenience any person or persons, shall be guilty of a gross misdemeanor:

    1. I laughed at first when I read the Washington State law and wondered if he could be charged with such an offense. I tried to see if we had anything like that in Kentucky and didn’t, nor surprisingly in any of the other states on a quick search. But, I was surprised when I found that Canada posts the following on the English version of the official site at:
      Criminal Code
      R.S.C., 1985, c. C-46
      An Act respecting the Criminal Law
      Offensive volatile substance
      178 Every one other than a peace officer engaged in the discharge of his duty who has in his possession in a public place or who deposits, throws or injects or causes to be deposited, thrown or injected in, into or near any place,
      • (a) an offensive volatile substance that is likely to alarm, inconvenience, discommode or cause discomfort to any person or to cause damage to property, or
      • (b) a stink or stench bomb or device from which any substance mentioned in paragraph (a) is or is capable of being liberated,
      is guilty of an offence punishable on summary conviction.
      • R.S., c. C-34, s. 174.
      Now I wonder if authorities in those two jurisdictions could actually charge him with such an offense? Thanks for sharing.

  5. This is a common problem worldwide. Especially in Japan. The one who denied it, supplied it.

  6. I’m surprised that no one, including JT, thought to mention whether or not this individual’s actions could have, or should have, garnered him a charge for assaulting an officer. There are previous cases in which just such a charge has been levelled at those who have behaved in a similar manner near others.

    I remember a kid, who attended junior high school with me, and, no joke–he was somehow capable of, upon demand, at a moment’s notice, letting out a rip-roaring fart. Didn’t matter the time of day or what he had just consumed. Perhaps it was a gift, the same way that some people can burp on cue? Who knows, but some people can burp or fart on cue. The same m.o. He would lift a leg, usually while seated, a let one rip, usually during class and usually aimed at someone who had disturbed him. This wasn’t by accident. This wasn’t a mistake. This was an intentional desire to cause a loud and noxious smell to leave his system and assault others. I strongly suspect that is what is occurring here. This is no accident. The scumbag wants to give it to his interrogators, and this is his method. I’d charge him with assault, although his public defenders would most likely cry that the poor waif was suffering intestinal issues because he lived in an area considered a food desert, where he was reduced to eating greasy ghetto food and, as such, cannot and should not be held accountable for his bodily functions. Yeah. Right.

    1. He’s a professor not a deity

      (although GWU quietly allows the myth to persist at CNN, FOX, MSNBC and the MSM).

    2. Get a grip big fellow. Lighten up a bit and have someone remind you to take your meds.

  7. Oh, and I can’t resist this one. Another Irish Poem, with some word plays:

    Le Crime’ Pets*???
    An Irish Poem by Squeeky Fromm

    “Quelle Horreur!!!” cried the dumbstricken flic! **
    “Mon Dieu!!!” but this fellow does reek!”
    “Oh Dear! The ordure,***
    I can not endure!”
    The cop cried as he ran with a shriek!

    Squeeky Fromm
    Girl Reporter

    * OK, “pets” is a French pun. “Farts” in French is “pets” pronounced “pay.” (It is the root word for “petard”, which some people get hoisted on.) The French word for “pays” is “paie” which pronounced like “pay.” Sooo, in French,Crime Pays “le crime paie” sounds about the same “le crime pets” or “crime farts.”

    ** “flic” is French word for “cop” and is pronounced sort of like “fleek”)

    *** In English, ordure is pro pronounced “or door” but in French is much closer to “oh dear.”

    Do I have too much time on my hands, or what???

  8. OK, sooo here’s the Question Du Jour. Why do farts smell sooo bad??? Answer below after the Irish Poem-

    An Irish Poem by Squeeky Fromm

    There once was a fellow named Sykes,
    Who garnered a lot of “Dislikes”—
    For the tunes he was squeezin’
    From his nether region,
    Caused the Methane Detector to spike!

    Squeeky Fromm
    Girl Reporter

    Answer: So that deaf people can enjoy them, too!

    1. Squeeky,
      I might not always agree with your analysis on issues, but I absolutely consistently love your “Irish poems”!! Thanks !

        1. Squeeky – you mean there was a way to stop you and we missed the train. Damn!!!! 😉

  9. SBDs. Just the start of a new heinous trend it weaponized digestive tracts. Started in Russia, I think. New government agency in the works.

      1. TIN – at least by leaning over, he gave them a heads up. It is the silent, but deadly ones that kill. 😉

  10. That is what opening a door and putting in a fan is for. Come on. Kansas City Missouri cops, you worried he is going to try to hang himself with the extention cord or something?
    —————- Your lower intestine is 21 feet long. A 200 lb man’s stomach can only hold so much food in-between meals. Are you really that over worked ? Are you so understaffed, that you are worried he is going to bolt through the door you lack the personel to guard?
    A felon with a gun pushing drugs, putting him back on the streets: What is the worst that could happen?

  11. Don’t forget to reload with hot Texas Chili. I would recommend extra beans & garlic.

  12. He may have IBS and is covered by the ADA. Or he could be on a new cholesterol med which causes flatulence. Whichever, this is not going to end.

    There is a funny episode of Dead Like Me where George (our likable Grim Reaper) interviews a job candidate who farts throughout the entire interview. He has IBS and threatens to sue if they don’t hire him.

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