Matthew J. Rubin may have a rye sense of humor and easy with the condiments, but he has to learn a bit about throwing food. For the second time in a month, a Florida man has been charged with battery by sandwich on a girlfriend. Rubin, 20, allegedly hurled a sandwich at his 19-year-old girlfriend during an argument over renewing insurance on his car. Port Lucie seems to have had a rash of these sandwich assaults.
His girlfriend says that he also hit the top of her head with his fist in the food fight. He admits to the flying sandwich toss but not the knuckle sandwich.
Last month, again in Port Lucie, Emmanuelle Rodriguez is accused of throwing a sandwich at his girlfriend while she was driving from his mother’s house in Port St. Lucie.
Port Lucie has been a constant source of entries on this blog, here and here — leading to plans for the Turley blog to open a satellite office in the town (near a sandwich shop).
The problem with the current case is that a Rueben sandwich found at the scene could be self-incriminating.
For the full story, click here.
Wonder where this puts James Cagney’s grapefruit scene.
Did anyone catch Prez-elect Obama’s advice to the kids today about walking dogs?
“If there’s poop, you have to clean it up.”
So much for the eloquent speeches. And boy, the metaphor could not be more relevant than what he is facing as the incoming President.
Yes, Mr. President-Elect … there is poop, and plenty of it.
I’m particularly looking forward to the Inaugural Address:
“The state of the economy is … ca-ca doody …”
Is the Hamburgler being charged along with this food-fighter? As to the claim of the fist to the head, I am sure he was just giving her a good natured “noogie”!
Scaredy cat.
Ha, Gyges!
Jill, young lady, I do not see your pretty face gracing these blawg pages.
I searched for the deputy dog avatar (cartoon character) and found it, but I would probably be violating some copyright law or something if I posted it as my thumbnail picture.
Any attorneys here know about avatar fair use/copyright law? Please do not reply unless your advice is pro bono. I am retired, doncha know.
Oh, and deputy dog is better lookin’ than I am.
Hey FFLEO,
I’m sure you look just fine and if you want to grace this blog with your photo, I say do it!
FFLEO,
You’re just not squinting enough.
Hey Jill,
You have heard of “the perfect face made just for radio” haven’t you….not all former LEOs are Clint Eastwood-esque…..
FFLEO,
We don’t have any pictures of “Officers of the Law”, current or Former! It’s time we did!!!
Gee thanks Jack B.!!
You don’t need a WordPress account, get a Gravatar account. It’s extremely simple, too.
Patty C,
Please do get a WP account. We do not have one thumbnail photo of an attractive, intelligent woman to brighten the place up, just mostly a bunch of blank-white outlined portraits…
Bro’ et al.
mespo started the play on words, typical of a trial lawyer…
Gee, maybe I’ll get a wordpress account…
Gives new meaning to the term ‘Club’ sandwich…
Good point Jack.
Let’s just say that anyone choosing to fling sandwiches at another might easily find themselves in a pickle.
It looks like Florida is trying to see if a grand jury really will indict a ham sandwich.
I’m sure we’ll soon be reading about a waiter at a deli getting tazed by a cop: “He was coming at me with a Club,” will be the officer’s defense.
And you said you guys don’t do humor LEO. Pretty funny stuff.
Of course, I heard that as far as sandwich attacks go, this one was not the Wurst.
I think we should all be thankful that he wasn’t making a more serious meal like beef wellington or heaven forbid, duck confit. I still have nightmares from the time I saw a man attacked with a piece of Chicken Kiev.
Man, you are really good at getting the latest food-fightin’ news *catch-up*. The toss sounds like a bunch of baloney to me even if he *mustered* all the force he could to *sandwitch* his girl.
However, I think Rubin is *toast*…just another poor Rubin gone a’rye from being sanwiched between his Ex-girl and the law…the proverbial ‘betwix a rock and a hard place.
Sort of a variation on the “Big Mac” attack!