Bizarre, Criminal law, Society, Torts

Nothing to Relish: Massachusetts Man Gets 18 Months for Stealing Hot Dog

300px-nci_visuals_food_hot_dogAntonio Judd really really wanted a hot dog. He grabbed a dog from a person on the street in Worcester and will now pay his debt to society with eighteen months in jail.


Judd has a prior record of assault and was found with a pellet gun — but the hot dog was long gone. The forensic “splatter” evidence included mustard spilled on the shirt of the victim.

The victim was sitting under a tree at 6:45 p,m. on August 12th when the offense occurred. Judd reportedly walked up and mumbled, “Eat that other dog?”

“Yes,” the man replied.

Lifting up his shirt, Mr. Judd showed what appeared to be a handgun, the police report said.

“I’m going to eat it,” Mr. Judd responded.

It can happen that fast. One second you are enjoying a cool evening with your hot dog and the next second it is gone with your culinary hopes and dreams.

This is not unique. As discussed earlier, Georgia Assistant District Attorney William Michael Olson, 36, resigned from his position as a prosecutor with Clarke County, Georgia after being arrested for a drunken fight with a hot dog vendor. The vendor says that Olson ate a hot dog and then tried to leave without paying for it, leading to a tussle.

Olson was arrested on misdemeanor charges of public intoxication and theft of services. He was released on a $500 bond. The fight occurred at 1:25 a.m. and when stopped by police Olson claimed not to know anything about the hot dog.

What is a fascinating forensic link is that Olson was implicated by the same splatter pattern evidence: mustard and ketchup on his shirt. Hardened hot dog thieves often forget about the incriminating condiments.

Olson, however, does not appear to have been hit with any jail time while Judd, as a repeated offender, will go away for a year and a half.

He can, of course, be sued in a tort action, though conversion would seem a better claim than trespass to chattel and replevin.

Armour hot dogs may have to make the following alterations to its slogan:

“HOT DOGS, Ar-mour HOT DOGS
What kind of kids love Ar-mour HOT DOGS?
Big kids, little kids, kids who climb on rocks
Fat kids, skinny kids, even kids with
chicken pox Love HOT DOGS,
Kids with records and kids with heat
Ar-mour HOT DOGS
The dogs kids love to eat!”

What is really amazing is that someone would do this for a Massachusetts hot dog when everyone knows that the best dawgs are found in Chicago. One could only imagine what he would have done for a Wolfy’s or Flukey’s dog.

For the Massachusetts story, click here.

49 thoughts on “Nothing to Relish: Massachusetts Man Gets 18 Months for Stealing Hot Dog”

  1. Bob,Esq. 1, September 29, 2009 at 6:35 pm

    Who doesn’t enjoy Grade F (mostly circus animals) meat?
    **********************

    Ever eaten sausage and enjoyed it? Chicken, luncheon meat? Never go to the factory. You’ll never eat again.

    With that said, something has to be done with the meat. PETA People Eating Tasting Animals.

  2. Never had a potato bun, my buddy turned me on to an “oatmeal bun”. Kinda weird and a little denser than I’m used to. Overall I love a “webers” bun. Nice processed wheat flour, devoid of most nutritional value, pure starch, but what the hell, when I eat a hot dog I eat it for taste not my waistline. Still has protein in it. Try a “belly-buster”. The gastronome in ‘you” should really love this. Pour canned chili, no beans into a cereal/salad bowl full of “fritos”, inhale until gone. Its’ an aneurysm in a “bowl”..

  3. You guys and the “doggone”(no pun intended)video clips. Love the classic Harry Callahan, nice piece o’ work. By the way, I love a good “chili dog”, with “cornmeal” instead of frijoles in the chili, I’m allergic. I like legumes, legumes most decidedly don’t like me..

  5. Ah the advantages of having traveled. Yes, indeed, the Flint Coney sauce ok. Need adventure in eating.

  6. It sounds like a Michigan hotdog with Texas condiments or should I say “fixins”.

  7. I also forgot the dill or sweet relish as well. Geeze nal, cheez whiz? Ok, I am game.

    Warning, do not agree to eat a stein of jalapenos in order to get free beer for a month if you have a date for the next day. The eating of the jalapenos was childs play, but the toxicity of the beer and jalapenos on an empty stomach the next day do not make for pleasant ruminations for a long lasting first date. For some reason or another they found it not so funny and wanted to go home early. Ah, the lessons we learn in life.

  9. The proper way to prepare a hot dog: Get Kogels Franks, steam them until they almost split. Get fresh potato buns, steam for 15 seconds in hotdog steamer. Get a dinner plate, take buns open and franks out of steamer and place bun on plate with the same opened at the sliced part. Place Frank in center of buns, with equal measures of buns on both sides. Get ketchup, mustard: place equal amounts on both sides. Get fresh homemade thick chili or wolf brand will do, no beans, warm just until boiling. Pour on plate of franks and buns. Slice up 1 med onion and 4 jalapenos and 1 and 1.5 cups of extra charp (sharp) cheddar cheese. Place cheese on top of chili and onions and jalapenos on top. Get knife and fork cut to bite size eat and enjoy. Repeat until gone.

    Additional toppings and variations may include sauerkraut. Prior to ingesting additional gastro-intestinal notify neighbors and fire department as fumes may become toxic. Family optional as they may deserve the wrath of methane.

    So yes, Billy, Hotdogs/franks may be eaten with ketchup.

  11. Billy 1, September 29, 2009 at 5:01 pm

    I’m a hot dog snob, I never felt ketchup had a place on a hot dog! Call me crazy…

    You so crazy…..

  12. billy:

    I think it was Magnum Force, wasn’t that the one where the young rogue cops were killing criminals and tried to get Clint to join them?

    If I remember correctly he was at a crime scene with the Golden Gate Bridge in the background near the beginning of the movie.

  14. Billy:

    as Clint Eastwood said in a Dirty Harry movie..”it’s un-American to put ketchup on a hot dog”

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