In Sarasota County, Florida, Neil Lansing, 34, proved a virtual Cornucopia during a cavity search during booking. Officers removed everything short of his lawyer in their routine search.
Lansing’s rectum contain 30 items, including 17 Oxycodone pills, 1 cigarette, 6 matches, 1 flint, 1 empty syringe with eraser over needle, 1 lip balm container, 1 condom, 1 CVS receipt, and a coupon.
I particularly like the coupon. Felonious yet frugal to the end.
He has now been charged with bringing drugs and tobacco inside a county jail.
Source: MSNBC
If this search was so thorough, how did they miss the CVS Extracare care tucked inside the CVS receipt?
Spencer Davis Group in STEREO? I’ll have to give a listen with my headphones when I get home. I’ve got some SDG in stereo in the queue.
I wonder if this may be of some use to this gentleman….
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VxA3atHD2QM&w=480&h=390]
S.B. GROSS … even my keyboard rebelled!
CROSS … as in yuk!
Gypes,
I am sorry for disappointing you….I hope never to miss the Target again….and I can almost assure you he will become a target…
I in my early years had a client…I did not handle him… I had a client that was forced to be the head master…..He got tired of the job sucking so be took it by the head and bit it off….. Well….not only was he cited for the violation but criminally charged….. We’ll on the date set for pre-trial…..The prosecutor offered a lesser offense than mayhem…. I was having troubling seeing why they charged him..the client that is….he didn’t see it coming either… We set it for trial….on the date set for trial….the judge gave a little leverage and encouragement to the prosecutor to dismiss it…. It was not a pretty site I was going to paint for a jury….and I wanted to, to….
People do not realize what happens to young meat in Prison… They become…the bunk bitch…
AY,
Really, you’re making someone else say it? I am disappointed.
Rectum? Damn near killed ’em.
culheath,
True enough.
AY never said there was.
AY,
There is nothing on my phone.
“Officers removed everything short of his lawyer in their routine search.”
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAA!
Oh dear….my laff for the day……………..
Buddha….check your phone….
John,
Any time a person is going into a correctional facility including family are subject to person searches… this generally only happens when hand to hand contact is available….
The inmate is searched for facility security…
I can just see his facial expression when he is demurely referred to as the “Cornho Aplenty”…..even your mamma can ride but she can’t drive…..
Apparently, Florida is topping the contraband smuggling of all states….But (no pun intended) its usually done by the guards and for profit…..
I am smiling about the condom… were the items enclosed or was he going to be practicing safe sex……
I thought he reminded me of something:
What?
No Get out of Jail Free card?
QUOTE “Officers removed everything short of his lawyer in their routine search.”
Thought cavity searches were ONLY done by Doc’s…and this idiot is the reason why they want abuses like this to be considered “routine”.
I notice the article doesn’t mention the charges…that make this “routine”…
What, no gerbil??
Since he kept the receipt, I’m a little curious as to which of these items he was planning on returning.