In the Land of the Armless Men, The One-Armed Man is Gang Leader: Maine Moves To Legalize Switchblades For One-Armed People

Maine lawmakers are addressing what appears to be a pressing public policy issue: one-armed people who want switchblade knives. A bill will allow one-armed persons to possess the currently illegal switchblades knives.

The Senate has already approved the measure and sent it over to the House (think of the Sharks/Jets scene from West Side Story).

Federal law already allows for the use of a switchblade for one armed people if the blade is shorter than three inches.

Source: Yahoo

17 thoughts on “In the Land of the Armless Men, The One-Armed Man is Gang Leader: Maine Moves To Legalize Switchblades For One-Armed People

  1. “. Apple. Veteran bookbinders know how to intermingle different raw components including fabrics and hardboards into a full form of beautiful shields available in attractive designs and colors of red, magenta, green, orange, etc.

  2. If this is such an important matter what, just what I ask, are they going to do for one legged men at an a**-kicking?

  3. so, if they catch a one armed person with a switchblade before the law passes what will they do, put the cuff on him.

  4. Raff,

    Very good question. The legislature spent several weeks considering weither the Whoopee Pie should be the “Official State of Maine Dessert”…..

    Finally after MUCH consideration it was declared the “Official State of Maine TREAT”.

    Meanwhile the Gubbanor is busy laying the groundwork to eliminate state workers; unions, benefits, jobs. That is when he’s not busy yelling at reporters, telling Obama to “kiss my ass”, and destroying State art work because it “sends the wrong message” to business.

    As to why even debate the merits of switchblades for one-armed citizens? Guess they want folks to bring a knife to a gun fight….

  5. I think the obvious question not being asked here is “how much of an arm counts as no arm?” Are we talking about only allowing those who have nothing beyond an empty shoulder socket to carry switch blades? Or are we allowing people with most or all of their radius and ulna to carry? Could a switch blade be built into a robotic prosthesis and controlled by either forearm muscle twitches or neural stimulus? I mean, sharks have no arms! Could they be equipped with switch blades in addition to lasers under this law?

  6. I have to agree with Prof. Turley. Why does the legislature think this is a pressing issue to spend time on? The State of Maine has one off the deep end lately.

  7. BIL
    I had not thought about shrimpers, but you have a point there too.

    If you have a line wrapped around a body part and the line is paying out in a hurry, it is a handy skill to have. I can see where a shrimper would spend quite a few hours in his or her bunk practicing the skill.

    Who needs worry beads when you have a well oiled Buck knife.

  8. OS,

    I thought a similar thing when I read this but my point of reference was shrimpers instead of Coast Guard.

  9. My son, a former Coast Guardsman, can get a standard Buck knife out of his pocket and have the blade flipped open faster than the eye can follow. He says an old Master Chief Petty Officer taught him the one-handed trick. It takes me both hands and several seconds to accomplish the same thing. He laughs at switch blades as a tool for ‘sissies.’

    This is a skill that can save a life or limb if one has to cut a line in a hurry, and most sailors and Coasties know the trick. To see a skilled deck hand do this awesome trick of skill reminds one of that great scene from Crocodile Dundee where Dundee tells the would-be robber, “No, THIS is a knife.”

  10. Andy has made a great point…even a pen can be misused…words too…but then again…that’s where the use of the knife comes in…then allha…a law against knives….weapons….etc….

  11. “The Senate has already approved the measure and sent it over to the House (think of the Sharks/Jets scene from West Side Story).”

    I don’t know, the Sharks/Jets were ferocious finger-snappers.

    Andy’s point is well made.

  12. Seems reasonable, however, there are non-spring knives that can be opened with one hand. They are common for sailors and fishermen. It is a tool and most, if not all, tools can be misused.

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