Springfield College Student Charged With Wasabi Assault

Springfield College (Massachusetts) student John McGuinness, 22, is facing a rather novel charge — assault with wasabi. McGuinness allegedly covered his girlfriend’s jeans in wasabi after learning “some guy she slept with in school was texting her.”

McGuinness had just finished watching the Celtics game when the incriminating text was discovered. After an argument, they split up but he later texted the girl to say that he still had her $200 jeans. However, when she arrived at his house, she claims he “came out to the driveway with my jeans covered in wasabi sauce.” He is accused of whipping the jeans at her and the girlfriend claims “I got wasabi sauce in my eyes and they were burning and I couldn’t see.” He is also accused of spraying the inside of her car with wasabi. He also allegedly threw her to the ground.

The police report confirmed that the woman’s 2007 Toyota Camry “was covered in wasabi sauce.”

Among the three misdemeanors is assault and battery “by dangerous weapon/sauce.” Is Wasabi a “dangerous” sauce? What is a “dangerous sauce”? Sounds like a criminal code for the homicidal saucier. Presumably any mustard would fit the definition but how about Worcestershire sauce or soy sauce?

As for McGuinness, he presented a rather curious defense. He reportedly confessed to throwing wasabi in her car, but insisted “she has done worse to my car in the past” and that she is “crazy.” He added “I want it known I am not drunk and she is.” That is a pity because being drunk might have offered some mitigation. She was not charged with drunk driving (the wasabi may have sobered her up) and he is now looking at three criminal charges.

It is not clear if the arrests will have an impact on the student at Springfield College. An assault charge can led to an expulsion, but these are misdemeanors. What is clear is that he will likely be monitored carefully around the school condiments.

In the meantime, the National Wasabi Association wants people to know that wasabi must be used responsibly, but wasabi does not kill people, people kill people.

Source: Smoking Gun

29 thoughts on “Springfield College Student Charged With Wasabi Assault”

  1. It is amazing all that you have gne thru and come out of not crazy, forget the meds (:
    It is astounding the pain of the capsasin is that bad.(and that was one treatment idea I never tried, and never will!)

    1. Lee,

      It’s amazing the pain that a person can endure when their life is at stake. Thankfully, I am one of the luckiest people you can imagine due to the blessings I’ve had.

  2. Mike That was my point ((*_*)). I had to look up the reason used for trigeminal neuralgia (and other pain conditions). I was very surprised to read it is because the capsacin hurts so much you learn to up your pain tolerance. Talk about torture for ultimate betterment.

    1. Lee,

      The year I had the shingles I later had an LVAD (artificial left ventricle) implanted, a heart transplant and then major lung surgery. I that whole torturous year the most painful thing I remember was having the shingles ad applying that infernal medication. Also after each of the surgery’s I refused the pain meds after the first day, since they were making me a little crazy. 🙂

  3. The good news is she’s rid of him……unless she’s brainless and decides to forgive him.

  4. When considering similar stories she should be glad that; explosives, rifles or handguns, flammable liquids/gases, edged weapons, blunt instruments, poisons, or wild animals were not used…

  5. We had a teacher / coach in a high school around here who forced a male student, who had misbehaved in some way, to put ceyanne pepper in his underwear and wear it. The coach ended up getting fired over that act. Surprisingly, the school wasn’t sued. It would have been a completely slam dunk case. The parents did not want to press charges wtih the PD. I tried to convince the Chief of Police there to open a criminal case against the teacher citing In Loco Parentis. But, it was to no avail.

  6. I bought a bottle of “Daves Insanity Sauce” I am smart ! I decided to drip some on a spoon and taste it first to judge its heat. Clumsily I got a tiny drop on my finger, I licked the tiny drop off before my intention to taste the 3 or 4 drops the spoon. Thank goodness!!! I threw the still drop bearing spoon in the sink. The next 15 minutes I was in difficulty, even to the extent of breathing with difficulty. I almost think these HOT sauces should be dispensed by prescription only. Daves Insanity isn’t even the hottest one. Has anyone ever died from drinking it? Would the producers of it be liable?
    As far as myself goes, this was just another close escape by me from being put on the Darwin is right list.

    1. @Dave Blauw – Long ago, I lived in Greeley, CO. (“The Town That Monfort Built”- had more cows in the feed lot, than people, even when UNC was in session). We had a drink called the Prairie Fire – a shot of tequila mixed with a tablespoon of Tabasco.

      Re: Dave’s Insanity, my step-son had a sample – toothpick dipped about a half-inch into a bottle – and ran from the store with tears in his eyes, and was out front, cacking like a cat trying to dislodge a fur-ball, when we caught up with him.

  7. Aside from the throwing her to the ground part and the total overreaction of it all, I have to give him points for creativity. And for the record, I think “dangerous sauce” sounds like an excellent product name.

  8. At a dinner where a friend left his roast beef unattended, a bite rolled and stuck to his fork. Unopened the roll, and put some horseradish in the middle, re-rolled and stuck it with a fork. Made for a “Religious Experience” (local hot sauce here in Western CO) when he returned and took a bite. You might want to try “Dave’s Insanity” as well, although there comes a point where it’s more heat than taste.

    A local hot wing place used to have a non-menu selection called “Bear Spray,” which was made from just that. They had to prep those wings outside the building.

  9. Inquiring minds want to know if she was porking the other boyfriend and thus deserved some kemasabi. What would Tonto say about this behavior of hers.

    1. LeeJ,

      I’ve no doubt it’s got some medical use, but it hurt so much it was unbelievable.

  10. “or have heard of capsaicin”


    About two years ago I developed a painful case of shingles around my chest. Capsaicin was a WebMD recommendation for relieving the pain. Desperate for relief I put it on the infected area only to find myself in more excruciating pain. Screaming with pain, my wife came to my rescue washing it off with milk. Then I read the label which explained that this stuff worked for shingles by increasing the pain to such an extent that when it wore off, the shingles pain seemed mild by comparison. Moral: Always read the label first.

    As for wasabi, it always seemed to me that it would be a excellent nostrum for clearing stuffed sinuses.

  11. “Is Wasabi a ‘dangerous’ sauce? What is a ‘dangerous sauce’? “ — Wasabi is horseradish; wasabi / horseradish, like mustard, gets its pungency from allyl isothiocyanate (AITC), which is tear gas. It’s a plant’s defense mechanism, and it can cause damage as well as pain.

    “Dangerous sauce” sounds ridiculous, but if you’ve ever gotten chili sauce in your eyes, or have heard of capsaicin (“pepper spray”), you might not laugh. People use it in self-defense, but have also attacked pets by dousing them in pepper sauce. Jessica Beagley of Alaska was convicted of child abuse by using hot sauce to punish her child. (She’s not the only one, but she was called “Hot Sauce Mom” in the press.)

  12. How does wasabi sauce compare to “safe” mace or pepper spray?

    If he’d have done this in France it would have been a crime of passion. In the middle east she would have received 100 lashes.

  13. Ah – young love!
    “Imma spread horseradish all over her car cuz the bich be crazy!” You might want to consider a long stretch of sobriety, kid.

  14. In the meantime, the National Wasabi Association wants people to know that wasabi must be used responsibly, but wasabi does not kill people, people kill people.”

    green fire …

  15. Step away from that sauce or we will have to Taze you Bro! I think Mr. McGuinness ad a little too much Guinness during the game. One more reason to stay away from Japanese food!

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