15 thoughts on “Canine Shredder”

  1. We dogs here at the marina read Kindle books off of the Dogalogue Machine which now translates books in English (no Deutsch as yet) into barks and growl sounds. If the NSA can develop a machine to talk to dolphins and dogs then think what they are doing with the Martians. Opps, That topic is off limits.

  2. Apparently the owner needs to go back to class… Dogs will chew what they will chew…. He probably used this excuse and now karma s come back….

  3. Our dogs were voracious readers, mostly nonfiction, but did read the Travis McGee series.

  4. I had a 1943 World Atlas, the expensive kind, in excellent condition. Found it some 40 years ago in the basement of my great-grandparents’ & grandparents’ home in Staten Island. Belonged to my father when he was 7 or 8, a gift from his Dad.

    Some years ago my late, beloved mixed, Gallifrey, must have had an anxious day. We had a one year old child, and had just moved. One day, I returned home from work to find she had chewed off most of the binding from the Atlas. Was I angry? Sure, at myself for not being smart enough to put the book on a higher shelf.

    When I was in my third year of L-school, I happened to intercept a box of mixed breed puppies- maybe 8 or 10 weeks old, being newly wheeled into the Atlanta Humane Society. “Newly”, insofar as the box contained a litter that had just been taken in & processed. Not even being put out for the public, yet. I admired a cute, grey one, the only grey one, and picked her up. She looked at me and then licked my face.

    I never had a dog before and as far as I’m concerned, though I love my wife’s present Wheaton, I will never have another dog. The point being that as significant & valuable as the binding-destroyed Atlas may have been, it was still just a material object.

    Gallifrey, a grey, 58 lbs. Mutt. 1985-1999. R.I.P.

  5. Grrrrrrrrrrrr-8*!*………More, More*!*!*!*

  6. “The dog ate my work” is a classic school excuse.

    http://www.poetryfoundation.org/poem/176546

    My Doggy Ate My Homework
    By Dave Crawley

    “My doggy ate my homework.
    He chewed it up,” I said.
    But when I offered my excuse
    My teacher shook her head.

    I saw this wasn’t going well.
    I didn’t want to fail.
    Before she had a chance to talk,
    I added to the tale:

    “Before he ate, he took my work
    And tossed it in a pot.
    He simmered it with succotash
    Till it was piping hot.

    “He scrambled up my science notes
    With eggs and bacon strips,
    Along with sautéed spelling words
    And baked potato chips.

    “He then took my arithmetic
    And had it gently fried.
    He broiled both my book reports
    With pickles on the side.

    “He wore a doggy apron
    As he cooked a notebook stew.
    He barked when I objected.
    There was nothing I could do.”

    “Did he wear a doggy chef hat?”
    She asked me with a scowl.
    “He did,” I said. “And taking it
    Would only make him growl.”

    My teacher frowned, but then I said
    As quickly as I could,
    “He covered it with ketchup,
    And he said it tasted good.”

    “A talking dog who likes to cook?”
    My teacher had a fit.
    She sent me to the office,
    And that is where I sit.

    I guess I made a big mistake
    In telling her all that.
    ’Cause I don’t have a doggy.
    It was eaten by my cat.

  7. Dogs chew on books and other educational material. What do humans chew on? Tobacco. Gum. Fingernails. Earlobes. Dog toys when no one but the dog is looking.

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