Waitress In Anti-Gay Check Controversy Denounced As Habitual Liar

receipt27n-6-webWe previously discussed the lesbian waitress in New Jersey, Dayna Morales, 22, who attracted international attention after being denied a tip by a family which allegedly wrote on the check that they did “not agree with your lifestyle.” The family later came forward with evidence suggesting that Morales had lied and that not only did she receive a tip from them but that they supported gay rights. Now, former friends are going public with allegations that Morales is a habitual liar. The irony is that, after the prior posting drew analogies to Stolen Valor cases, Morales is now accused of lying about her service with the U.S. Marine Corp. Morales has remained conspicuously silent despite numerous media appearances during the rise of the story.

Morales works as a server at Gallop Asian Bistro in Bridgewater and posted a photo on Facebook showing the bill with a line through the tip area. The photo of the receipt showed someone had written, “I’m sorry but I cannot tip because I do not agree with your lifestyle.” However, the New Jersey couple came forward with their receipt showing no such words and a tip for $18. We previously discussed, if true, whether Morales could face criminal or civil liability.


857437-fd34c33c-4d78-11e3-9491-1affab8972a4Now, various sources are coming forward to allege Morales lied about a wide variety of other issues, including her military service. While some former friends have recounted stories of combat missions and an explosion that killed everyone in her unit except her, the Marines say that Morales was never stationed abroad, let alone in combat. Moreover, she was dishonorably discharged in May after being stationed in Newburgh, N.Y.

Another fellow employee claims that, while working at the Cheesecake Factory, she told coworkers that she had brain cancer and shaved her hair before it fell out from treatments. She received assistance from concerned workers at the restaurant before reportedly quitting.

Other friends recounted how she allegedly claimed that she was raped by her father who also killed her baby. Others from a day care center where she once worked said that Morales told co-workers that Superstorm Sandy virtually destroyed her home, including a boat that went through her living room. When they went out to the house of our concern, they said that they found nothing more than slight damage to a carpet near the front door.

Some of these former friends have gone on the record like Kristina Calamusa, who says that Morales claimed to her that she was “blown up by a land mine overseas.” Likewise, Julie Howat and Karolee Larkin, both 23, said that Morales told them about her serving in Afghanistan and surviving an explosion that killed everyone in her platoon. They say that the explosion left her as the unit’s sole survivor.

While Morales has remained silent, these sources are raising questions about the media’s rush on the story. However, the media was faced not only with her claims but the supporting position of the restaurant itself. It is difficult to do a background investigation on every source of a story when she is posting a receipt supporting her claims. The fact is that the media continues to rely on some basic assumptions of honesty or at least self-preservation in people who go public with such accounts. However, like the Tawana Brawley story, the controversy can take on a life of its own when combined with powerful social or racial elements.


Once again, I find the tie into the alleged lies about military service to be the most interesting aspects of this story. If true, we have often discussed how stolen valor claims are part of a larger life of fantasy by this relatively small group of people.  We certainly saw that in subject of  the Supreme Court case. Such people often weave lies that extend beyond claims of being decorated combat veterans. This case also shows how disclosure of such alleged lies brings a sufficient punishment for these people who become social pariahs.

If it is shown that Morales lied, do you think that she should be charged or sued for the misrepresentation?

27 thoughts on “Waitress In Anti-Gay Check Controversy Denounced As Habitual Liar

  1. Juliet,

    True. As I mentioned on the other thread, her pattern of behavior reminded me of a guy I knew who was a diagnosed pathological liar. The scale and frequency of the lies is just like the outrageous things he used to say. He wasn’t an intrinsically evil guy. He literally could not help it. I get the same impression here: it might be beyond her conscious control.

  2. AY,

    I’m sure there is more to the discharge story than that too. I’m guess more than a little stockade time was involved if she was that level of insubordinate.

  3. “… but there is a bigger issue that the media jumps on these kinds of stories and incentivizes lying.”

    Yes. Not only that but it almost always has some sort of discrimination card tied to it.

  4. A friend dated a Pathological liar who also claimed distinguished military service. That was the lie that caught up with him by a stolen valor investigator. The media tried to get his side of the story and he never admitted guilt and sidelined the questioning. A couple months later he was found on a beach apparently used a shotgun on himself. I hope this woman gets help.

  5. This woman “dogpiled” on the couple she libeled. She “dogpiled” on the people she conned out of money for her “cancer.” She’s a thief, liar and con artist. Victims of crimes are TRUE victims in this society. They are victimized by the criminal and then by allegedly empathetic people who don’t even consider their plight. I have dealt w/ too many of these sociopaths to think she can be helped by therapy. She’ll con the therapist. She needs criminal convictions and close supervision by probation. I’m sure the court would order an evaluation and follow-up treatment. I can abide that but I’ve seen too many of these people to think it will matter. We’re only seeing people she has hurt in the workplace. Imagine the pain she has inflicted on family and friends. How about some compassion for the many victims. Can you spare @ least 20% of your compassion for them?

  6. Yes, I agree with those who say she has mental health issues. Rational people would anticipate that eventually the truth would come out and they would face humiliation and worse, sad case.

  7. Sociopathic. She needs treatment. She needs a different kind of job that does not involve exchange of money for individualized service.

  8. I have a cousin like that-I keep expecting to find her in the news for this self-same thing. Those people are damaging, angry people. They hurt and use others without any conscience. I think she should be charged and held accountable for any statutory crimes she may have committed and I think they should throw the book at her because, ultimately, she is only going to be harmful to the greater society if she is out in it.

    Have compassion for her all you want. Liars don’t change, users don’t change-they just change the tools they use to harm others. Therapy won’t help whatever it is that is bothering her. From my observations, its uncurable.

  9. Wait a minute here, we must exercise extreme care about calling gay people liars. How do we know that the people who claim she is a liar are not lying? Is it merely another heterosexual conspiracy to advance the notion that gay people are capable of lying? Did the evil heterosexuals, who forged phony evidence to convince everyone that this woman lied about their victimization of her, hire people to claim she is a pathological liar?

    We must not jump to the conclusion that this woman is a liar. An international truth commission must be established to submit all the parties to lie detector tests and provide forensic scientists to analyze the physical evidence.

    This is a matter of grave importance as we can’t allow another gay person to be victimized by mean-spirited homophobic heterosexuals. I also find it disturbing that so many people resort to hate speech regarding sociopaths. Don’ they realize that many of our Empire’s greatest leaders were/are sociopaths?

    I hope Obama speaks to this matter soon so that the nation can move on and heal.

  10. If she lied, she should apologize publicly to the people she falsely accused of homophobia. If she took money for cancer treatments when she did not have cancer nor receive treatments, she should apologize and give back every last dime. These actions need to be done whether this is a case of mental illness or sociopathy.

    I stress that this is only what should happen if she lied. The media should fact check before running with a story. I have a bad feeling that this story was one of many intended to turn ordinary people against each other. This seems to be a common propaganda technique used by the powerful. While ordinary people learn to turn on each other, the powerful’s bad actions remain hidden from our scrutiny. We should stop buying into this kind of crap.

  11. Ms. Morales seems to be a person with mental problems.
    If she is sick then have her get treatment.
    If she is sick then there is no reason to take pleasure in hounding her.

    I think she is a liar. I also think she is probably mentally ill.
    In this season of Hanukkah and Christmas let’s do what the new
    Pope “Frankie” is exhorting us all to do,….. “Show A Little Kindness”,…..

  12. Sad story as this young lady does seem to have some serious issues. I would agree that if she has lied, apologies should be made by the major news outlets who jumped all over the customer and people like me who believed her.

  13. i can feel no sympathy for her. she has lied time and again. and this time she dragged others into her lies. the other lies ex her so called military service, being raped by her father who killed her baby, having cancer all offend me. why because at 12 i was raped by my sisters father while my mother was pregnant with my sister. some of you know i have cancer among other illinesses that give me maybe a year to live. i wanted to go into the navy when i was a teen but i had to choose to between taking care of my siblings or going in the navy. i never went in the navy. had she kept the lies on herself we wouldnt be having this debate. she decided to pull others in. i too have a couple family members who are pathological liars in my family. and yet none of them have managed to drag others into the worlds spot light with their lies. they are well aware of the lies they tell and will tell you so. yet their reasoning is that they can’t help themselves, that the opinion of how the world sees them is whats count and they want the world to literally think they are either superstars or victims… self made victims i call themselves..

    they deliberately get themselves into situations and get caught up and yet its everyone else fault that they got caught up… it may or may not be a mental illiness…… but they are well enough to know they need help and are damn sure capable of finding and getting it. they choose not to.

  14. Whether or not psychopathy is a mental illness is a touchy subject in this country, in terms of criminal responsibility. But chronic lying and conning others are two behaviors strongly associated with being a psychopath. She might not be the physically aggressive type of psychopath, but she certainly seems to have a bunch of the qualities of being a psychopath– chronic lying, chronic conning others, not thinking of the consequences of one’s behavior, a lack of responsibility in employment, using others for financial benefit…

  15. Thats a bunch of BS, I keep my customer copy all the time without writing on it, they could have just as easily found that receipt after hearing about this and filled it in. The family are liars.

  16. In re Morales’ discharge — the Department of Defense adopted streamlined procedures around 2005 0r 2006 for kicking chronic absentees out of the Reserve components of our armed forces. Kicking a guy out of the *active* components normally requires a general court-martial (that is to say, a court-martial presided over by an officer of at least one-star general or admiral rank), but that’s not really practical for the Reserves. I served in both the active Army and the Army Reserve, and when I was in the Reserve, I was obligated for at least one weekend a month plus an annual training period that lasted about two full weeks, normally in the summer. If you missed a weekend drill, you could make it up on a different weekend, but you’d be given a lot of s**tty, undesirable and unpleasant duties to perform during that makeup period. I don’t know what would have happened if you missed part or all of the 2-week annual training. Anyway, in my experience, folks simply attended the regularly scheduled drills and all was well. I don’t know what level of Reserve Hooky would get someone kicked out as I never saw anyone miss more than one weekend drill.

    In any event, now that we know Morales was kicked out of the Marine Corps Reserves for chronic absenteeism, IMO we can reasonably consider her to be a pretty accomplished slacker.

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