Bizarre, Religion

“Release The Beast”: Monster Energy Drink Exposed As Tool Of Satan

150px-Monster_energy_drink_feature10641737-devil-mascot-profile-with-hornsI just saw this video on YouTube of how Monster energy drink is a tool of Satan. I had previously thought it was just a really lousy drink but it turns out to be much much worse. The company’s slogan “Unleash the beast” appears more than a catchy tagline.

This just shows how gullible I am. I would have thought that Satan would have chosen Red Bull as a classic graven image for its energy drink of choice.

She does not even mention that the company used to play music by the Beastie Boys (before it was sued by the band members), a clear reference to the Biblical Beast.

42 thoughts on ““Release The Beast”: Monster Energy Drink Exposed As Tool Of Satan”

  3. I recall as a child being told by a parish priest to avoid playing with Ouija boards.

  4. Darren – would the devil invest in something destined to fail so he could tempt other investors to their ultimate financial doom?

  5. My tricked 7.6 litre Dodge 2500 is adorned with a bumper sticker applied by my son: “This baby runs like a humming bird on Red Bull.” And, it does.

  7. When I saw the headline, I just assumed the story was about some mother whose 5 boys consumed a bunch of energy drinks. Of COURSE she would have come to that conclusion!

    🙂

  10. Why thank you Nick. It’s my birthday today and I thought I was entitled to get in one good warmup swing before heading off to court.

  12. Who removed the video? Just like you all I too wanted to take yet another opportunity to seize upon the ignorance of one Christian by heaping scorn and derision on the whole lot of them. Bummer.

  14. I just had a flashback to Flip Wilson, who would have been an excellent spokesperson for Monster….. As he takes a sip he says, “The devil made me do it.”

  16. My personal favorite was the phallic symbols on the DVD cover of Aladdin by Disney. Actually, they had just shrunk their art work from the original and the minarets looked very phallic on a smaller scale. 😉

    Darren – that energy drink stuff will kill you. I can see Satan investing. I am sure he has a taste of most of the fitness places and all of the fitness boot camps.

  17. I never thought Satan would invest in the energy drink market. Being eternal, one would think he would not be into risk capital and stick to index funds. I expected better diversification among omnipotent beings.

    This obsession with short sales and bear markets is a bit pessimistic on his part.

  18. Don’t forget backward masking. Still laugh about that one & I’m a follower of The Way.

    I remember the stuff about the P & G label also. Maybe the debbil is more into fooling Christians than they realize?

    SamFox

  20. “I would have thought that Satan would have chosen Red Bull as a classic craven image for its energy drink of choice.”
    But that drink gives you wings.

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