Since we discussed the decline in American education this morning, it is only appropriate to discuss a brain drain of a different kind in Texas. The University of Texas at Austin has reported that 100 brains have gone missing from its collection.
The brains were preserved in jars of formaldehyde. They are believed to have been stolen. If they are seeking the usual suspects, we have one obvious choice beyond the our run-of-the-mill Dairy Queen brain bandit :
It is not known if “Abbey Normal” was one of the brains but a close match was the brain of clock tower sniper Charles Whitman, who killed 16 people and wounded 32 others on the University of Texas at Austin campus on August 1, 1966.
The Austin State Hospital loaned the brains to the university about 28 years ago under a “temporary possession” agreement. Due to a lack of space, some of the brains were moved to the basement of the university’s Animal Resources Center. It is not clear what penalties exist under such an agreement given the length of time and the curious task of putting a valuation on the brains, though Whitman’s brain might be more valuable on the brain market, if one exists. However, one interesting twist is that the university’s agreement with the hospital required the school to remove any data identifying the person from whom the brain came. Thus, Whitman’s brain was not marked, but they confirmed it has gone missing with the rest of the collected grey matter.
Source: Yahoo
As they say: “If you are 20 and not a liberal, you have no heart. If you are 30 and not a conservative, you have no brain.”
Texas board of Education?
This is very sad! There is already a real shortage of brains in Austin. (pssst! which explains all the liberals in Austin.)
Squeeky Fromm
Girl Reporter
Rick Perry’s brain is missing..or did I read that wrong?
The Koch Brothers – Building A Brighter Future
zedalis – if you allow them to, the Koch Brothers will bring you a much brighter future than you have right now. 😉
BRAINSSS!
Sorry. Someone had to say it.
In an act of unparalleled kindness, someone at UT Austin probably donated the brains to Texas A&M. The Aggies lost a lot of academic smarts when they joined the SEC.
Reblogged this on veritasusa and commented:
Don’t take any wooden nickels, don’t buy any hot black market brains.
Reblogged this on Collectables and commented:
The comments are even better!
Is it possible some super-patriot took the 100 brains in order to fill the currently empty skulls in the Senate?
Margy – are you thinking someone stole the brains as a collectible?
Brains in Texas? Who knew?
Too bad they can’t get Gene Wilder to install them in the heads of the Senate.
Whooooooooo, would ever have thought… that ‘Brains’ would be scarce in Texas???? Oh, my……..!
[Rambling on]
They were badly needed by the football program this year, the fact that they were defective brains in formaldehyde seems to have only served to have landed the Longhorns in more of a pickle.
I do find the timing odd though – stolen right before the Asministration’s Commission on Militarization of the Police convenes; and then issues a report that says among other things that the problem is not the weapons of war being used on the streets against our population, but that we need to better train the executive branch soldiers in how to deploy and use those weapons against citizens.
Living in the greater Austin area, if I see one on Craigslist I think calling the police to report it will still be a no-brainer.
[/rambling off]
It’s the beginning of the Zombie Apocalypse.
Darren – I do have my Zombie attack kit and escape plan.
Probably taken by Oklahoma State. They’ve been running at a deficit for some time now.
The probably moved them and have forgotten where they put them. Happens all the time. I cannot find half the stuff I move.
It is possible, doubtful but possible, that the brains will be used to hide things (drugs, bombs) that will use the ick factor to fend off close examination because who would want to touch/smell that. Doubtful and disgusting, really, but we live in a different world now. Who would have ever thought of an underwear bomber previously, for example.
Did they include the missing brains in the administration?
I would suspect Greeks… Bearing gifts.