Can You Guess What This Person Was Charged With?

screenshot_2016-08-30_at_4_optJoshua Lee Crook  appears to prove that a name can make a man.  However, his list of offenses and the item that triggered the crime spree brings new meaning to the slogan “Dangerously cheesy.”

 

The item was Flamin’ Hot Cheetos, whcih appeared irresistible for Crook.  According to St. Louis police, Crook, 33, was recognized by a store manager as someone who had previously stolen goods.  Around 5 pm on Sunday, Crook went into the gas station store and tried to take the Cheetos.  The owner told him to put it back.  However, Crook returned a few minutes later and again tried to take the Cheetos.  When the manager stopped him, he assaulted the manager by striking him in the face.

The police then say Crook went outside and poured gas on the ground and threw the pump in the spill.  He then threw his cigarette on the spill. However, the scene is more suitable for a movie script than reality.

 

Nothing happen . . . at least with the gasoline.

The police showed up and Crook was arrested.  He now faces charges of first-degree attempted arson, trespassing, theft and third-degree assault.

 

9 thoughts on “Can You Guess What This Person Was Charged With?

  1. He needs to be charged with “assault on a mug shot”. Punishment should fit the crime. Set him on fire. Put the fire out with battery acid. Throw him in the Mississippi River at the foot of the arch.

  2. There are degrees of attempt to commit arson? I won’t even ponder why and leave it to the great legal minds of our time. It seems pretty cut and dried to me. Either he attempted arson or he didn’t, and therefore there’s only one degree.

  3. If orange is the new black, then Cheetos are the new crack. Hey, that rhymes. Move over Squeeky, I’m moving in on your territory.

    If Michael Brown can waltz into a convenience store and assault the worker on-duty as he blatantly steals a box of cigars, why can’t this pink-faced cracker do the same with a bag of Cheetos? After all, Michael Brown has been elevated to the status of saint. Yeah, move over Mother Theresa. You’ve got nothing on Saint Michael. We have all learned a valuable lesson from Saint Michael and the madness that ensued his miserable life–walk into a store, steal, assault the shopkeeper and then, if things don’t go as expected, torch the place. Hell, torch the entire city. No need to worry. The cops will be told, through the marching orders of the President and demanded of our city and state officials, to stand down. Just a few, little, non-violent protests. Letting out a little steam. His attorney should use that defense. Insist that his client believed, in the aftermath of the entire Michael Brown madness and the same madness duplicated, around the country, that it was justified to attempt to burn down the place after he didn’t succeed in nabbing those Cheetos.

    #CheetosLivesMatter.

  4. Have you noticed that more and more people are becoming belligerent toward authority. I think it is one of the signs of fascism caused by the excessive amounts of taxation and regulatory fees being extrapolated from the middle and lower classes. With 100,000,000 people now living at or near the poverty line, it has to be pretty frustrating to them to see some of the crap the ruling class is getting away with and there being left with the crumbs and crappy jobs.

  5. Yes, the Indian guy, with broken English, missing teeth and a fifth grade education–if he’s lucky–and barely managing to survive by running a convenience store, is definitely part of the elite. The ruling class. The country club set. Why, surely, we all comprehend the frustration someone like this inbred hillbilly must feel when he can’t get his Cheetos fix. Ah, yes, it is all part of class warfare. We need to be more tolerant and understanding of meth-heads. The Man has him oppressed. We need to be apologizing to him for having the audacity to charge him with a series of crimes. The convenience store guy is the one that we should be prosecuting. You know, one of the privileged elite. It’s all his fault.

  6. This has been the decade of über megalomaniacal spoiled brats. . . . the me-me-me, in your face, my way or the highway, safe space, only my feelings, race, and views count generation! Did this guy go to Mizzou! Lol

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