We previously discussed the bizarre divorce case of former Chicago Cubs player Ben Zobrist and his estranged wife Julianna Zobrist. The case took a nasty turn when it came out that Zobrist was suing his former pastor Bryon Yawn for $6 million. He is accusing Yawn of sleeping with his wife, Julianna, a contemporary-Christian singer, after they came to him for marital counseling. Yawn, former pastor at Community Bible Church in Nashville, is also accused of stealing money from Yobrist’s charity. Now Julianna has come forward with a claim of $4 million that is breathtaking in its audacity and, in my view, lunacy. Thus, I award it my Equus Gluteus Maximus (EGM) Award for legal argument. The EGM is awarded to only those arguments that truly distinguished themselves in sheer asininity.
At the outset, I have to admit a bias toward Ben Zobrist as a lifelong Cubs fan. We are, after all, indelibly linked in history and baseball legend: Ben as the MVP of the 2016 World Series and myself as the person who broke the Billygoat curse that allowed him (and the Cubbies) to win.
However, the most recent claim of the Julianna Zobrist could seal her reputation as the most ridiculed figure in Chicago since Steve Bartman.
Julianna is demanding millions on the premise that Zobrist did not play hard enough as a player and therefore failed to protect their “marital assets.” This is from a wife who had an affair with their pastor — an affair that reportedly was the reason that Ben Zobrist fell apart. (Ben Zobrist is deeply religious and reportedly did not want a divorce so he consulted with the pastor secretly sleeping with his wife).
Nevertheless, Julianna believes that Ben should have bucked up Buttercup and played harder: she insists her husband “essentially went from the top of his game to basically giving up, which caused a massive loss in income” and that he “intentionally and voluntarily stopped working.” I wonder why.
She is now arguing “In 2019, he had a contract with the Chicago Cubs for ($12 million), but since he only played for 2 months, his salary was prorated and he only earned ($4.5 million) of the ($12 million) he could have earned.” Ben Zobrist claims that it was Julianna who “coaxed him” back into playing.
This is akin to an arsonist suing the victim for failing to have less combustible possessions.
The claim in my view is so utterly beyond the pale that it more than warrants the distinction of a EGM.