Columbia University satire student paper The Federalist has long relished triggering readers, particularly conservatives. When it mocked the murder of Charlie Kirk, it shrugged off objections and suggested that people need to get a sense of humor. However, the paper has now apologized for something beyond satire: land acknowledgments. The editors issued a cringing apology for a joke about land acknowledgments. It appears that, unlike political assassinations, land acknowledgments are simply not laughing matters. It pledged to focus on something called “punch-up humor” that picks only on “people and systems in positions of power.”
The editors removed a column titled “I Lived It: Before We Had Sex, My Boyfriend Said a Land Acknowledgment.” It posted a statement on its Instagram page that the article “upset many members of the Columbia community and handled a sensitive topic rashly and irresponsibly: the important recognition of the native land Columbia University and much of our country sit on.”
We take full accountability for the weight of our harmful words, and we thank Columbia’s Native American Council, as well as other members of the community, for bringing this to our attention. We deeply apologize for any harm this article caused, and we are taking this moment to refine our humor guidelines to ensure that our mission of satire does not hurt communities and voices that should uplifted.
In a moment like the one we are currently living in on a campus like ours, political satire is more important than ever, and we would like to reaffirm our commitment to uplifting marginalized voices in this endeavor.
It was a telling moment in higher education, with institutions fighting to coerce faculty members and students to engage in what critics call a woke, performative moment before meetings, classes, and events.
Recently, the University of Washington settled a case after burning a fortune on litigation over a professor’s dissenting view of land acknowledgment.
We previously discussed the case of Professor Stuart Reges, who teaches at the computer science and engineering school of the University of Washington. He refused to post the school’s “land acknowledgment” and instead posted an alternative statement. Professor Reges sued the university and various officials in 2022. Professor Reges has declared, “Land acknowledgments are performative acts of conformity that should be resisted, even if it lands you in court.”
After the university encouraged faculty to add a prewritten “Indigenous land acknowledgment” statement to their syllabi, reading:
“The University of Washington acknowledges the Coast Salish peoples of this land, the land which touches the shared waters of all tribes and bands within the Suquamish, Tulalip and Muckleshoot nations.”
Reges decided to write his own statement:
“I acknowledge that by the labor theory of property the Coast Salish people can claim historical ownership of almost none of the land currently occupied by the University of Washington.”
The labor theory (which I teach) generally refers to John Locke’s theory. In his Second Treatise, Locke laid the foundation for property as a divine gift of God that began in the state of nature, where all was created in common by God. Reges declared that these tribes, indigenous people, “can claim historical ownership of almost none of the land and that the claim of the university land was not sufficiently used or developed to bestow a claim upon the Coast Salish people. That acknowledged group is a broad collection of different groups with ethnic or linguistic associations.”
In his lawsuit, Professor Reges detailed how, after he stated his own views, the university moved against him.
Reges noted that the university allowed other professors “to include modified statements in their syllabi that were more consistent with the University’s recommended statement.” The operative point is that “other faculty at the Allen School continue to include land acknowledgment statements in their syllabi that differ from the University’s own statement, so long as they express a viewpoint consistent with the University’s recommended version.”
That ended up costing the public a massive amount of money in Washington, but none of the faculty or administrators responsible for this conflict incurred any penalties or costs. Indeed, they were heralded for their struggle in favor of land acknowledgments.
Given such efforts, it is clear that many in academia will not tolerate any jokes, let alone alternatives, to land acknowledgments. It is part of the ideological echo chamber of higher education. The joke, however, is on these forces of orthodoxy. Forcing public apologies with public acknowledgments only undermines efforts to get people to consider the history of Native peoples.
Many of us support discussion and recognition of the history of native peoples. We simply oppose mandatory land acknowledgments, including “voluntary” systems that bar alternatives or coerce participation. As for the cringing editors of The Federalist, they supplied the greatest satirical moment after claiming a mission to “doggedly pursue the truth in its most raw, exaggerated, hyperbolic, blatantly untrue form.”
Some matters in higher education are simply beyond satire, and that is a truly pathetic acknowledgment.
We might want to inquire whether the Welsh people would appreciate it if the English were to grieve the land from which the Saxons drove the native Celts into Wales.
America’s concept of private property evolved only fairly recently from the legal principle that all land belongs to the Crown. Prof. Turley’s ancestors enjoyed a broad spectrum of legal devices by which to shift the ownership concept via contract to a new tenant. Lawyers created the illusion of property ownership via baby steps just effectively as merchants temporarily injected the concept of slavery into Anglo-American law.
The next absurdity should be for speakers to simply recite a standard statement advocating for institutions to issue a quitclaim deed to their property to the nearest surviving American Indian tribe.
Anything from Columbia is totally worthless. Columbia only produces dumb Far-Leftist students taught by Far-Leftist IslamoCommuNazis, who hate America, hate Israel, hate humanity, hate freedom and liberty–but love Islamic Terrorists, Commies, and Nazis and other Fascists. There’s no point in even writing an article about such scumbagwormmeat with sub-73 IQs.
It’s another indicator that, by and large, the children of the professional-managerial class are unworthy of their heritage; it’s a reasonable wager their parents are as well. They make common cause with foreigners who are both malevolent and graceless.
North America stole the land from Pangea.
Land Acknowledgment? Seriously? This is a perfect example of why so many of us refuse to take anyone or anything too seriously. OK, let’s go. I want to apologize to the Choctaws, who took the land from the Tishamingos, who stole it from the Ittawambas, who conquered the Pontotocs, who murdered the Chickasaws and whoever the heck they stole it from. I may have left someone out. If so, I apologize to them, too. There, I am all better.
Only in America!
I’m watching the NFL Rams game in California.
Some of the TV ADs are for “COVERED CALIFORNIA,” free medical insurance, “CALFRESH,” free food, and “CALWORKS” free money.
California ADVERTISES welfare, affirmative action, and free healthcare—”free stuff” and “free status”—on TV.
Now I know why we pay massive taxes; it’s for all the parasites and illegal alien invaders, past and present.
You give parasites the vote, and they vote for parasitism.
Big surprise, right?
I don’t see what’s wrong with having more and more “parasites and illegal alien invaders”. They are a vital component of the economy, creating extra work and employment for police officers, lawyers, supermarkets, and so forth.
Who knows? Maybe one day, one of the parasites and illegal alien invaders will discover cures for cancer, heart disease, and leukemia. Do you really want to take a chance with fewer parasites and illegal alien invaders and lose out to all the wonderful things they do?
Looking for links to the article that is the subject of Prof. Turley’s essay. I have tried three popular LLMs and the Way Back machine so far. Please post the link of anyone has dredged it up from some archive. TIA.
“King Charles Will Acknowledge ‘The Wrongs of the Past’ but Won’t Apologize or ‘Offer Reparations’ During Caribbean Royal Tour”
– Yahoo News
_________________
“King Charles III makes it clear: No apology and no reparations for historical slavery from the UK or the Crown.”
– Exploring GB, Facebook
_____________________________
“King Charles will not apologise for slavery during his upcoming Caribbean tour.”
– Sky News
Yesterday I left a comment suggesting that the persons harassing Justice Roberts showed the behavior of religious acolytes. Even more characteristic of religious behavior is the almost ceremonial and groveling apology to authority for straying from orthodoxy. Doesn’t Islam mean submission?.
The ONLY POSSIBLE native Americans were the American Founders.
A person cannot be a “native” citizen of a political entity before that entity exists, and the United States of America was formally established by the founding generation between 1776 and 1789.
Indians are native to Asia.
The deep ancestry of Indigenous Americans traces back directly to populations in Siberia and East Asia.
Indians had no “land,” no surveys, no deeds, no bills of sale, no County Recorder, no real estate agents, no real property, no courts, no government, and no nation.
Indians were landless Asiatic nomads.
The only possible native Americans were the American Founders.
The communists have enormous, infinite amounts of false propaganda and reams of indoctrination materials.
What about the mound builders? There were great cities in the Mississippian Valley, long gone before Louis and Clark. There have been linguistic similarities in various indigenous peoples languages that are common to the Mayan. Time erases all signs if long enough.
There is a specific, frantic energy to the TDS troll, X, who has just discovered the “ tag. For someone whose intellectual horizon is a flat line, HTML is not a language of structure or accessibility, but a superpower of visual chaos. X treats Res Ipsa blob like a digital ransom note, convinced that alternating neon green Avatar to a yellow one is the pinnacle of psychological warfare.
X’s “mastery” is revealed in the erratic spacing and the misplaced `` tags that never quite close, leaving the rest of the blog to suffer through a permanent state of bolded aggression. X doesnt build sites; he builds digital dung consisting of five hundred nested frames and an auto-playing MIDI file of a scream. To X the ability to make a link lead to a Rickroll is not a dated joke, but a sophisticated exploit of the highest order.
LOL! Anonymous seems to be a big fan. A very jealous and bitter fan. Wow.
Again, nothing of substance or anything related to the issue. Obviously you’re quite paranoid and…delusional. But hilarious nonetheless.
Re.: AI Overview [ WordPress Avatars for Anonymous Comments ]
WordPress assigns a default generic icon (like the Mystery Person or Gravatar logo) to anonymous or guest commenters who do not have an associated Gravatar profile [0.6.6, 0.6.11.
How Default Anonymous Avatars Work
• Gravatar Integration: By default, WordPress checks the commenter’s email against Gravatar [0.6.11,. If no account exists, it displays your site’s chosen fallback image.
(i.e.: fallback image = neon green Avatar)
@ Punch This: Your comment is appreciated but misconceived. Bad-Anon (Trolls) under a variety of Names & Avatar has been a resident Troll here for more than a few years.
He/She/It has its own problems with control. In respect to the constant marginalization of most every comment in the blogs comment section, please consider that the Troll is in a state of self ‘Institutionalisation’.
Although the ‘Sociopathy’ of this Troll is relatively sever, their attempts to squelch the Honest Free Speech have been miniscule.
Taking a dismissive approach to the Troll’s comments work well for most Viewers.
[Link] en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Institutionalisation
[Link] en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychopathy#Sociopathy
By default, WordPress assigns a generic avatar to guest commenters
‘X’ isn’t ‘he’! ‘X’ is ‘IT’, and nothing more.
Spain has not issued land acknowledgments to Asiatic nomads, or Indians, in the Americas, nor has the modern Spanish government adopted the practice of making formal land acknowledgments.
Spain conquered Asiatic nomads in the Americas more than two centuries before the United States existed as an independent nation.
The Spanish Timeline
• 1492: Christopher Columbus arrived in the Caribbean, beginning the Spanish colonization and subjugation of the Americas.
• 1519–1521: Spanish conquistador Hernán Cortés defeated the Aztec Empire in present-day Mexico.
• 1532–1572: Francisco Pizarro led the conquest of the Inca Empire in South America.
• 1565–1610: The Spanish established permanent North American outposts like St. Augustine in Florida (1565) and Santa Fe in New Mexico (1610), exerting control and forcing local tribes into mission and labor systems.
If not Spain, who? If not now, when?
Gotta give Professor Turley credit for his expertise in using false equivalence. Obviously the majority of readers here, too dumb to notice or care, because they can barely read for comprehension or get nuance are the first to start jumping to conclusions and….rage.
It took a little bit of research and some actual reading for comprehension to figure out this is much more than what the Professor alleges. It’s pretty wild really.
First: Professor Turley talks about two different issues and pretends they are the same thing. They are not.
The University of Washington case was a legal First Amendment dispute regarding state-level viewpoint discrimination against a professor. Conversely, The Federalist is a voluntary student group that chose to listen to its peers in the Columbia Native American Council. Listening to feedback from classmates and issuing an apology is an exercise of community accountability and free association, completely detached from administrative coercion.
What they did was literally an exercise in journalistic ethics. Not hypocrisy. If Professor Turley took the time to really understand how comedy or satire actually does would change the whole narrative he wants to peddle. Ironically comedian Dave Chappell made this very point on one of his specials. Turley didn’t notice it because he was busy manufacturing this narrative to illicit rage among the lazy conservatives, and the perpetually ignorant.
Satire is a tool historically meant to challenge entrenched power structures (punching up), not to marginalize communities that have experienced systemic historic displacement (punching down) something Turley either deliberately ignored or was completely ignorant about it in order to pursue his false narrative. When The Federalist mocked a prominent political figure or system, they targeted entities with national platforms and significant political power. Recognizing that a joke about land acknowledgments may trivialize the genuine, ongoing struggle of Native American student groups is a mature choice to refine editorial guidelines—not a surrender of free speech. They recognized that they were punching down on a group, it is considered an unspoken rule in the word of satire and standup comedy.
Turley in his clever melding of two separate issues which the dumber ones won’t be able to notice. Paints a false narrative about what the Federalist actually did. They exercised, literally, some journalistic ethical accountability. Turley turned it into something for the right to gripe about and…lol, rage about. Absolutely hilarious!
Dahhyum! We almost had a day without < 55 IQ commentary until Duh Troll showed up. The crack he took last night was in short supply
LOL
He is back after taking some HTML lessons
Speaking of the dumb and ignorant, right on time anonymous.
Oh look at the limp wrist one try to punch down! Hilarious 😂
Do you get off on starting arguments just for giggles? It is obvious you’re a narcissist. Not fun dealing with nutty narcissists.
I bet you didn’t bother to actually read what I wrote which would explain the ignorance and aggressive jealousy. Yikes!
Shouldn’t Sally be having babies and cooking dinner?
No wonder America has been invaded; there are no more Americans.
The American fertility rate is in a “death spiral,” which means America is in a “death spiral.”
If it is the duty of American men to fight their country’s wars, it is the duty of American women to bear children sufficient to grow and protect the country.
The satire here is not directed against native Americans; it’s directed against virtue signaling progressive elites. To say this is “punching down” is wrong; it’s very much “punching up.”
Native Americans like that they can own land, and the law protects ownership rights. That system came from the European settlers. Where is the gratitude? What if I were a prof and posted this Land Acknowledgement?:
“We’d like to acknowledge the peoples who’ve previously lived on these lands. Land passed among various tribes by violence and threat of violence for ages — then newcomers brought writing systems, private property ownership, and public deed records. Since then, this property ceased being subjected to violent dislocations — the new system making possible the establishment of this great institution. That system now receives our acknowledgement”.