JONATHAN TURLEY

36 Responses to “Horn-O-Plenty: Inmate Found With 30 Items During Cavity Search”

1. 1 Buddha Is Laughing 1, February 17, 2011 at 8:16 am

   Since he kept the receipt, I’m a little curious as to which of these items he was planning on returning.
2. 2 Stamford Liberal 1, February 17, 2011 at 8:25 am

   What, no gerbil??
3. 3 John 1, February 17, 2011 at 8:36 am

   QUOTE “Officers removed everything short of his lawyer in their routine search.”

   Thought cavity searches were ONLY done by Doc’s…and this idiot is the reason why they want abuses like this to be considered “routine”.

   I notice the article doesn’t mention the charges…that make this “routine”…
4. 4 Bud 1, February 17, 2011 at 8:38 am

   What?

   No Get out of Jail Free card?
5. 5 eniobob 1, February 17, 2011 at 8:43 am

   I thought he reminded me of something:
6. 6 Anonymously Yours 1, February 17, 2011 at 8:44 am

   I can just see his facial expression when he is demurely referred to as the “Cornho Aplenty”…..even your mamma can ride but she can’t drive…..

   Apparently, Florida is topping the contraband smuggling of all states….But (no pun intended) its usually done by the guards and for profit…..

   I am smiling about the condom… were the items enclosed or was he going to be practicing safe sex……
7. 7 Anonymously Yours 1, February 17, 2011 at 8:49 am

   John,

   Any time a person is going into a correctional facility including family are subject to person searches… this generally only happens when hand to hand contact is available….

   The inmate is searched for facility security…
8. 8 Anonymously Yours 1, February 17, 2011 at 8:59 am

   Buddha….check your phone….
9. 9 Woosty's still a Cat 1, February 17, 2011 at 9:09 am

   “Officers removed everything short of his lawyer in their routine search.”

   HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAA!

   Oh dear….my laff for the day……………..
10. 10 Buddha Is Laughing 1, February 17, 2011 at 9:42 am

    AY,

    There is nothing on my phone.
11. 11 culheath 1, February 17, 2011 at 9:51 am

    AY never said there was.
12. 12 Buddha Is Laughing 1, February 17, 2011 at 10:07 am

    culheath,

    True enough.
13. 13 Gyges 1, February 17, 2011 at 10:57 am

    AY,

    Really, you’re making someone else say it? I am disappointed.

    Rectum? Damn near killed ‘em.
14. 14 Anonymously Yours 1, February 17, 2011 at 11:29 am

    Gypes,

    I am sorry for disappointing you….I hope never to miss the Target again….and I can almost assure you he will become a target…

    I in my early years had a client…I did not handle him… I had a client that was forced to be the head master…..He got tired of the job sucking so be took it by the head and bit it off….. Well….not only was he cited for the violation but criminally charged….. We’ll on the date set for pre-trial…..The prosecutor offered a lesser offense than mayhem…. I was having troubling seeing why they charged him..the client that is….he didn’t see it coming either… We set it for trial….on the date set for trial….the judge gave a little leverage and encouragement to the prosecutor to dismiss it…. It was not a pretty site I was going to paint for a jury….and I wanted to, to….

    People do not realize what happens to young meat in Prison… They become…the bunk bitch…
15. 15 Blouise 1, February 17, 2011 at 1:46 pm

    CROSS … as in yuk!
16. 16 Blouise 1, February 17, 2011 at 1:47 pm

    S.B. GROSS … even my keyboard rebelled!
17. 17 Anonymously Yours 1, February 17, 2011 at 2:07 pm

    I wonder if this may be of some use to this gentleman….
18. 18 Nal 1, February 17, 2011 at 3:11 pm

    Spencer Davis Group in STEREO? I’ll have to give a listen with my headphones when I get home. I’ve got some SDG in stereo in the queue.
19. 19 Mike Appleton 1, February 17, 2011 at 3:20 pm

    If this search was so thorough, how did they miss the CVS Extracare care tucked inside the CVS receipt?
20. 20 Mike Appleton 1, February 17, 2011 at 3:22 pm

    Whoops. Extracare “card.”
21. 21 Anonymously Yours 1, February 17, 2011 at 3:58 pm

    Now I forgot about this song….
22. 22 pete 1, February 17, 2011 at 5:12 pm

    o.k. but in all honesty the wristwatch and class ring belonged to the deputy doing the search.
23. 23 Buddha Is Laughing 1, February 17, 2011 at 5:22 pm

    pete,

    lol

    You’re such a romantic!
24. 24 pardon me? 1, February 17, 2011 at 6:03 pm

    this guy needs analysis.
25. 25 Anonymously Yours 1, February 17, 2011 at 6:24 pm

    pardon me?

    Maybe this will assist if the boys issues….
26. 26 guilhem 1, February 17, 2011 at 9:26 pm

    BiL: Maybe he kept the receipt for tax deductions?

    Couldn’t they use some sort of echography to detect foreign objects without having to humiliate and basically rape all the prisoners who are not trying to smuggle anything? I doubt (or at least hope not) the officials are taking pleasure in it.
27. 27 HenMan 1, February 17, 2011 at 10:32 pm

    The rectum search, by the way, was done in a professional manner by Officer Ben Dover.
28. 28 HenMan 1, February 17, 2011 at 10:42 pm

    Stamford Liberal-

    “Gerbils? We ain’t got no gerbils. We don’t need no gerbils. I don’t have to show you any stinking gerbils!”
29. 29 Woosty's still a Cat 1, February 17, 2011 at 10:59 pm

    that was the weirdest vid I’ve ever seen….
30. 30 HenMan 1, February 17, 2011 at 11:21 pm

    AY-

    Great video! Isn’t that the sequel to “Naked Lunch”?
31. 31 Buddha Is Laughing 1, February 18, 2011 at 12:03 am

    That’s not the weirdest thing I’ve ever seen, but it’s pretty close.

    Catchy little ditty too.
32. 32 rafflaw 1, February 18, 2011 at 12:17 am

    I think I need therapy after watching that Avalanch video.
    I think this inmate should be utilized to test the TSA employees at the airports to make sure they are being as invasive as they can. Maybe I am getting old, but how the hell can you put all the stuff up your behind? Did he have an accomplice?
33. 33 Anonymously Yours 1, February 18, 2011 at 10:58 am

    I would like to think that life has offered me the opportunity to listen to various music….or at least they call it music…
34. 34 Joe Momma 1, March 2, 2011 at 12:03 pm

    It’s the Keister bunny
35. 35 Khara 1, March 2, 2011 at 12:17 pm

    I went to high school with Neil and this is so sad. An example of what happens to people when they screw with drugs. He was athletic and smart and then the next thing you know he is shooting heroin and robbing houses. It’s nauseating.

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