Now, this is what you call a case of first impression. In Willmar, Minnnesota, Scott Wagar, 50, was upset with kids toilet-papering his house in that common homecoming adolescent practice. He decided, therefore, to spray them with . . . . fox urine.
Wager was arrested for in Kandiyohi County District Court for misdemeanor assault and other charges. Police say that he donned night vision goggles to carry out his urination ruination plan. He reportedly also struggled with one teen who he says grabbed him from behind.
Technically, he used a one-third fox urine, two-third water mix — preferred by all teen-spraying homeowners. I have been working on possible defenses since this would constitute both criminal assault and common law battery in tort. One would be that Wager was really marking his territory as other males in the animal kingdom. Another is the Castle Doctrine — which admittedly usually involves in shooting people and not peeing on them.
The biggest problem, however, may be the large number of foxes in the area during mating season. Horny foxes vs. playful teens . . . it is a tough call.
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