Crying Foul: Man Sexually Assaults Chickens on Television to Attract Women

hansi-chicken-molester-1Nothing like a German to teach one how to woo a woman. A bachelor farmer and nudist named Hansi has sexually assaulted chickens on live TV to impress possible female companions. PETA and animal rights activists are crying foul.

Hansi is 71, but participated in a TV program where men tried to get female contestants interested in them. Most presumably go for the standard sweets and roses approach as opposed to poultry abuse. He explains on TV: “Hansi is always happy when the chickens are happy.” I simply cannot imagine why Hansi is a bachelor.

It did not seem to work with contestant Marianne, 66, who noted “You always hear jokes about what lonely farmers do to their animals. I am disgusted. This is not my world.”

It is a bit odd that buggering chickens is allowed on German television. In the United States, even a wardrobe malfunction is verboten. Then there is the small problem of abuse of animals on live television, which also does not appear a serious issue in the controversy.

For the full story, click here.

7 thoughts on “Crying Foul: Man Sexually Assaults Chickens on Television to Attract Women”

  1. What I want to know is when exactly does nailing a chicken go from “are you out of your damn mind?” to “hey, baby, peck here often?” I’d like to see that logic tree.

  2. I believe the Peabody award winning show ‘South Park’ had an episode dealing with this issue.

    Particularly amusing was Eric Cartman’s portrayal of ‘the authoritarian mindset.’

  3. I think this guy will be remaining a bachelor for a long, long time if this ishis idea of attracting women. Yikes! I feel sorry for the chickens. This is one sick German. Should he go to a Shrink or a veterinarian for help?

Comments are closed.