Bizarre, Criminal law, Environment, Society

DENY EVERYTHING

humorous-142_smallI know this looks bad but there is always a defense.

Of course, this week’s award for creativity in a criminal defense belongs to Keith Griffin of Jensen Beach, Florida.

We are on our last day in Duck after a wonderful time with monster waves, dolphin sightings, and castle building. My effort to secure a job as a cabana boy or lifeguard has been entirely unsuccessful and I will be forced to resume my work as a bitter, pale lawyer.

15 thoughts on “DENY EVERYTHING”

  1. Speaking of denial techniques, those of you interested in psychology as directly applied to police work/interrogation might want to read this article (Mike S, FFELO, I know you were discussing psychology and police work in another thread.). It’s about “passive” (as in non-aggressive) interrogation techniques now being used by the British and a study of their effectiveness.

    http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=111809280&ps=cprs

    Just make torture look that more ridiculous (and still as illegal as it ever was) as an interrogation technique, doesn’t it?

  2. The defense claims that the photo was altered. Where exactly is the toilet? Or is this Spiderman’s bathroom?

  3. why blame this on the cat? some dogs are just party animals.
    they should be taught to clean up after themselves. and don’t give them any more beer. okay?

  4. This industrious little dawg is simply a government employee at the local dog pound who knows that any govmint job is incomplete until the paperwork is done…either that, or V.P. Cheney hired him as his paper shredder…

  5. lol

    Jill,

    Guy Noir is missing his shtick! Nice catch too. If that photo was B&W it would have that old Hollywood “City Crime Confidential” crime scene look to it.

  6. My name is TP. I’m a hard biting P.I. from the Twin Cities.

    Word had it that one of the higher ups had been messing with the toilet paper in our airport bathrooms. Police were too frightened to investigate so they called me in under the covers. I said, yeah, I’d look into it for a bone. So the cops went to the butcher and I asked my woman to drop me off at the airport.

    Sooose to not arouse suspicion I arranged to meet my man there and we commenced hanging around the bathroom. Boy, you see all kinds of people in the bathroom. This one guy seemed particularly interesting.

    He kept peering out of the stall and he appeared to have a wide stance. As he moved his hand along the side edge of the stall, we knew we had our guy. I ran for his pant legs and made a ruckus. The guy began to fumble with the toilet paper and you see the results. He fled the scene just as my man took the picture of me solving the crime.

    I went home to a nice bone, a good rest and the satisfaction of another job well done by TP, P.I. from the Twin Cities.

  8. I had a high school chemistry teacher who told me that his wife was going to take their cat to the vet and when she ran back into the house to get something, the cat, in the car in the driveway (which went downhill to the garage), jumped onto the shifter and took it out of gear, making the car roll and smash into the garage door. I don’t know what really happened or if he believed her, but that was the story.

    JT, we love you all bitter and pale. How effective or entertaining would you be if you traded your intensity and indignation for time in a hammock?

  9. I have to agree with Mr. Griffin with his claim that the “cat did it” because you just can’t trust those sneaky cats. Especially when it comes to porn! Prof. T., Have a great last day of vacation and I am sorry that your cabana boy interview didn’t go too well! At least you have something to fall back on.

  10. PaulT,

    You summed that up nicely with your ABCs….and you identified the crux of Obama’s problem with your D.

    We all need to think like Elvis in his song, “I forgot to remember to forget…”

    Debut 9/17/1955 #1 Country Charts; Charted for 39 weeks

    Source: Joel Whitburn’s Top Country Singles 1944-1993

    Billboard

  11. A: There was no crime
    B: IF there was a crime, I didn’t do it.
    C: If I did do it, I have a memo from Judge Bybee authorizing it.
    D: We should be looking forward…

  12. “Don’t blame me, I found it this way.”

    That phrase and this photo should be adorning walls of D.C. along with the other “inspirational” office prints such as “Success: It all depends on how you spin it.” and “Hang in there, baby! It’s almost time to pass the buck!”

  15. And the dog says: Hey man, I just walked in here and was assessing the damage. Where is that Cat, I’ll make him clean it up.

    Or was that what Rove said to Cheney about Scooter in the Plame matter?

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