Is This Your Homework, Larry? Students in Two Cases Implicated in Crimes After Allegedly Leaving Homework at the Crime Scene

300px-Homework_-_vector_mathsDespite the claims of parents about always doing your homework, homework has been the undoing of many a fine criminal. In two cases this week, alleged high school and college felons were implicated when they left homework at the scene of the crime.

125px-PhiPsiCrestThe first crime occurred at the University of Arizona where fraternity pledges with Phi Kappa Psi fraternity were allegedly sent by members to take every copy of the university paper, the Daily Wildcat — 10,000 copies in all. The reason, the paper suggests, is that the college reporters had done a story on an alleged fraternity date-rape.

Papers were found dumped in various places outside of the campus.

The article reported that a girl claimed to have been drugged at a Phi Kappa Psi party and thought she may have been raped.

The paper says that the culprits dropped their homework at one dump site — homework belonged to PKP pledges Nick Kovalski and Alex Cornell.

UASealPKP President Keith Peters refused to speak to reporters. What is remarkable is that the city and university police appear to have dropped the case. The newspaper reports that they are not sure that a crime has been committed because the paper is free. That is odd. Just because a paper is free does not mean that it can be wantonly destroyed. Under this theory, paid newspapers in various cities could regularly pick up the copies of free papers like Denver’s Westword and dump them into landfills. This was the destruction of property, not the use of the newspapers. It also fits such crimes as criminal mischief and potentially conversion. It cost the media department about $8,500, and the paper was forced to run free ads for businesses that bought space in the stolen papers.

I have no desire to see these students go to jail, but I believe an investigation is warranted with a plea (and eventual expunging of their records after probation) if they in fact committed these acts. Clearly, the students and the fraternity brothers who sent them on such a mission should also face suspension.

If the campus and city police will not act, the newspaper should sue both the fraternity and the students for conversion.

It is also a shocking attack on free speech and free press at a university, but the campus police seem to be responding with a giant collective yawn. It has become all to common on campuses, here.

For the full story, click here

In the meantime, a high school student in Rhode Island has been charged in a robbery after he left his homework at the home. The police in Woonsocket say that the two 15-year-old boys skipped class Monday and broke into a house near school. The homework fell out as they loaded their school bags with loot like video game systems.

They were charged with breaking and entering — and being late on their homework.

For the high school case, click here.

It is all straight out of the Big Lebowski:

6 thoughts on “Is This Your Homework, Larry? Students in Two Cases Implicated in Crimes After Allegedly Leaving Homework at the Crime Scene”

  1. Life imitates art imitating life.

    From the wiki for The Big Lebowski:

    “As in the film, Exline’s car was impounded by the Los Angeles Police Department and Abernathy found an 8th grader’s homework under the passenger seat.”

  2. “Nihilists! F#$% me. I mean, say what you like about the tenets of National Socialism, Dude, at least it’s an ethos.”

  3. It looks like PKP has some pretty low standards on the pledges that they accept! I also am puzzled why the University is taking no action. I am wondering if someone high in the administration has a son in the fraternity.

  4. As to the University one, well who ever said that LEO’s could read? They mostly perform a perfunctory role of escalation of most situations. Then after they get out of hand they use the taser. Some though got into the game for the wrong reasons, like power etc. So, how would they know if a crime had been committed? Mostly stupid is a stupid does, when you become a LEO you too can be judge. Who is going to dispute the word of such?

    As to the Students in High School, would someone remind me of what homework is. I seemed to have missed that class.

Comments are closed.