Question of the Day: What Book Does A Naked Man Check Out of the Library?

Ypsilanti police are looking for a naked man who first exposed himself in the Ypsilanti District Library. The librarian had assisted the man in locating a book and then turned around to find him naked — he then fled with the book. The problem with the police report is that it fails to mention the book title. Perhaps we can help. As forewarning to future librarians, what books is a naked man most likely to check out from a library?

He clearly has already read The Emperor’s New Clothes but failed to read it to the end.

Here are my top five nominations:

1. Naked by David Sedaris

2. Getting Naked Again by Judith Sills

3. The Bare Naked Book (Children’s section)

4. The Book of Skin by Steven Connor

5. Unnatural Exposure by Patricia Cornell

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32 thoughts on “Question of the Day: What Book Does A Naked Man Check Out of the Library?”

  1. Naked In Death by J. D. Robb for all the crime thriller fans here. You could read any of the books listed while listening to one of my favorite song writers Randy Newman:


  2. I was thinking of checking out that Raul Julia classic film, “Moon over Pair-a-drawers.”

  3. “Dangles and Bangles: 25 Funky Accessories to Make and Wear” by Sherri Haab

    “Boo-Boo Dangle and the Disappearing Bangle” by ???

    Overexposed (Harlequin Blaze) by Leslie Kelly

  4. Blouise–

    Here are some titles of children’s books for you:

    1. Oh, No! Where Are My Pants? edited by Lee Bennett Hopkins
    2. I Never Did That Before by Lilian Moore
    3. Flicker Flash by Joan Bransfield Graham
    4. Did You See What I Saw? by Kay Winters
    5. But Excuse Me That Is My Book by Lauren Child
    6. Wiggle by Doreen Cronin
    7. Brown Bear, Brown Bear, What Do You See?

    Note: The first four titles are poetry books.

  5. Professor Turley,

    The nuns were always warning us girls about “dangling participles” in parochial school. Now–at my advanced age–I’m not so sure they were talking about grammar!

  6. Here are some more titles for you:

    1. Exposure: A Novel by Brandilyn Collins
    2. Exposure: A Novel by Kathryn Harrison
    3. Private Parts by Howard Stern
    4. Out in the Open by R. Louis Schultz, Lauren Keswick, & Sean Kahlil
    5. Running Naked through the Streets by Carmine White
    6. My Partiple’s Dangling by John Nelson

  7. Lets us all be thankful it is not any of us, or was it? As it is DAMN COLD right now in Michigan. I wonder what physical descriptions she gave the police.

    As we are well aware of there is the mans version and the womans…..

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