Itchy Trigger Finger or Simple Suicide? Russian Officer Reportedly Shoots Himself In The Head By Scratching Nose With Loaded Gun

Russian investigators have concluded that a 23-year-old police officer killed himself when he scratched his nose . . . with a loaded gun. The officer was found under his desk with a fatal head wound.

The police appear eager to rule out suicide. However, I am a bit perplexed how forensic experts could conclude the dead man had a nose itch shortly before shooting himself in the head. They insist that, because he allegedly did not leave a suicide note, a nose itch is the only explanation. Notably, however, the door to the office was locked and no one was in the room.

We have certainly seen weapons used to lit cigarettes (here) and perform household chores (here). However, an itchy nose is not the easiest explanation in such a case.

For the story, click here.

9 thoughts on “Itchy Trigger Finger or Simple Suicide? Russian Officer Reportedly Shoots Himself In The Head By Scratching Nose With Loaded Gun”

  1. “Darwin. DAAARwin! Are you in here Darwin?

    Darwin?”

    The joke’s on you. He took care of the itch, didn’t he?

  2. That is hardly the most appropriate way to *blow* one’s nose…

    My hunch is that a fellow Russian officer killed him and this is the best cover-up the “new Russian Bureaucracy” could conceive.

  3. “However, I am a bit perplexed how forensic experts could conclude the dead man had a nose itch shortly before shooting himself in the head.”

    I’m just ‘shooting from the hip’ here, but I imagine it has to do with bullet entry and exit, and the victim’s handedness. A right-handed person scratching a particular side of the nose would be wrist-restricted into certain positions when holding a pistol, so scratching his nose might be a pretty good guess.

    They might even test for squalene and epidermal cells on the gun barrel tip.

    Elementary, my dear Turley. 😀

  4. The automatically generated associated stories about 11% of those calling into suicide hotlines change their intentions about killing themselves is worth noting. Texas-drug-rehabs.org has a hotline and, from time to time we will get calls from folks that are tired of “playing the game” and tired of confronting their addiction and feel that suicide is a easy way out. We are good at letting them realize the values of other choices. The trick is to get them out of their apathetic thinking and get them angry about their addiction, or drug pushers, or government. Anger is a much healthier position and from there you can get some movement towards life.

  5. Unless he shot himself IN THE NOSE, that explanation is probably false.

    However, it also wouldn’t surprise me if it were true. I shoot, and I see people do stupid shit with guns all the time. Even when sober.

    Hell, didn’t you run an article here a couple of months ago about some rocket scientist (another Russian, as I recall) who decided to play Russian roulette with a SEMIAUTOMATIC? Christ, you can’t get stupider than that.

Comments are closed.