28 thoughts on “New Video Reveals Truth About Bears In The Wild”

  1. idealist707 1, January 2, 2013 at 6:52 pm

    Dredd,

    Are you a seal, white killer whale, or just a guy who washes the brown stains out of his underwear each day.

    I know a eastgerman/brazilian/swede who built his own boats; first one on a manufactured steel hull and then on an aluminum one. He has sailed to anarctis two times and rounded the horn four times. A quiet type. He and his hungarian/russian educated/brasilian wife, who is an anthropologist, had me and a psychiatrist to dinner.
    Got to see photos of his reception by the personnel at the research station there.

    True, can maybe supply the site addresses.

    Your exploits are only exceeded by your daring and your will to explore.
    A doer, not a dreamer. Admirable.
    ================================================
    But what I can’t convey is the power of nature. We have to grasp that ourselves.

    People worry about bears but think nothing of what is coming in terms of climate catastrophe.

    They should reconsider.

    As another point I want to share with my bloggy friends here, is that on that trip I had to navigate via dead reckoning and a depth finder.

    Storms knocked out the autopilot and radar before we reached the light house north of Kodiak and south of Homer Alaska.

    The charts were pre 1964 when the quake (largest ever) lifted up substantial portions of the bottom of the Gulf of Alaska as much as 100′ for an area twice the size of Texas … which made the depths on the charts off and harder to follow.

    I had to do a reading on the depth finder, go to the charts, subtract an amount I though the Gulf depth had changed (I averaged it out after many readings to come up with an adjustment value), and get a general idea within 30-50 miles of where we were.

    When the engines began to overheat after a week of storms (two new V-8 Cat diesels) I had to think faster than I had been.

    I noticed a huge undersea plateau called “The Fairweather Grounds” or “The Fairweather Banks” south of Valdez and Mount Fairweather, and made for it.

    After many hours, the depth finder registered a sudden, notable change in depth, so I knew we were over the undersea plateau, which meant I knew where we were “for certain.”

    I made way for Cape Fairweather which is at the base of Mount Fairweather, a giant about 15,000 feet altitude, seemingly right on the coast.

    It was night when we found shelter on the other side of the sea mount, with calm water, and so I dropped anchor a couple hundred yards off shore.

    In the morning Fairweather looked like Kilimanjaro, I kid you not.

    Later that day we made way for Cross Sound (a narrow passage into the inland waters) under better weather conditions.

    A glacier was, back then, right up to the beach, about a 100 feet high, and about five miles wide, the most beautiful blue.

    Anyway, once we got inside the Alexander Archipelago waters, protected from open waters, it was not much more than a sight seeing trip for a couple of weeks (she only made 7 knots at best).

    Until Seymour Narrows, where over 300 ships have gone tits up.

    But that is another story.

  2. GOP congress goes out of existence without taking care of the danger greater than bears:

    The plain-speaking governor of New Jersey, Chris Christie, embarked on an extended tirade against his own party members in Congress on Wednesday, raging against what he described as the “toxic internal politics” of House Republicans.

    Christie, a high-profile Republican who is among the potential candidates for a run at the presidency in 2016, used invective against his own party usually only heard in attacks from Democrats.

    Although he was specifically angry over the House’s failure to vote on a compensation package for victims of hurricane Sandy, he expanded his rant to criticise House Republicans in general and the House Republican Speaker John Boehner in particular.

    (Lots of Bodies With Bells On Their Feet). There are not many bears on the East Coast beaches from Cape Hatteras up to Cape Cod, but boy do they have weather.

    And some don’t care about them even though they do not have power yet, homes, yet, cars yet, or good citizens to help them yet.

    Grin and bear it.

  3. Dredd,

    Are you a seal, white killer whale, or just a guy who washes the brown stains out of his underwear each day.

    I know a eastgerman/brazilian/swede who built his own boats; first one on a manufactured steel hull and then on an aluminum one. He has sailed to anarctis two times and rounded the horn four times. A quiet type. He and his hungarian/russian educated/brasilian wife, who is an anthropologist, had me and a psychiatrist to dinner.
    Got to see photos of his reception by the personnel at the research station there.

    True, can maybe supply the site addresses.

    Your exploits are only exceeded by your daring and your will to explore.
    A doer, not a dreamer. Admirable.

  4. Thank you Johnathan….. that was funny and cute. nice way to start the new year.

  5. The climate in bear country is far more of a concern than bears are.

    Royal Dutch Shell and Barry may figure that out yet Barry & Oil-Qaeda vs Arctic Wilderness.

    Then again they may not.

    Not many people have traversed that Gulf in a wooden boat in February. Me and another dood did it.

    For me, it was a once in a lifetime deal because I would not do it again.

    Not in an 85′ crabber built in 1932. Left Kodiak up to lighthouse south of Home, East to Cape Fairweather, East past Glacier Bay to Cross Sound, down the inland water way (Alexander Archipelago) to Seattle.

    It took thirty days.

    The Kulluk was not as fortunate, so far:

  6. Most bear scat has cameras in it from sneaking up on them then making that alien camera sound.

    Don’t surprise them and you will be ok 99% of the time.

    The place for most bears per square mile in the world is on Admiralty Island in the Alexander Archipelago of Southeastern Alaska (Brown Bear).

    Second is in the Kluane Game Sanctuary in the Yukon Territory (Grizzly).

    The largest bears are on Kodiak Island (Kodiak Brown).

    Been to all three places in the middle of them.

    My anecdotal message is from decades of living very, very close, and also just regular.

    Never a problem with them. Not one.

    Learn how their amygdala works, and yours, and you will abide like The Dood.

  7. We’ve gone to Alaska a couple times and did some great hiking. As you probably know, a lot of people wear bells on their shoes to alert bears of your presence. This old timer told me a joke. “Do you know how to tell the difference between brown bear and black bear scat? Well, the brown bear scat has bells in it!”

  8. Darren – before you go to the great white North, makes sure (1) all premiums are up-to-date, and (2) tell the Mrs. you love her… Same instructions given to me when I (almost) took a dare to swat a bison on the ass in Yellowstone. Thank goodness my riding partners forgot the “double-dog dare” concept that would have required me to take action.

  9. If need exists, then climbing a tree is an alternative.
    If you have a handy tree and can climb better than the bears. Adults climb poorly. Too high a fat to muscle ratio.
    Also keep a full battery in your cell and be in range of a base station.

    For those who know: Would mace or pepper spray help? Tear gas?

    1. Two off my head comments – 1. Go with a partner. You don’t have to run fast, just faster than them. 2. Surprising bears can be prevented by wearing “jingle bells” and carrying bear spray. It’s been proven that only 3 out of 8 piles of bear scat smell like pepper, and contain jingle bells…

  10. This video is great news. When I fly to Alaska to go hiking, I won’t have to go through the headache of getting my .308 hunting rifle through the special baggage section at the airport. I guess we no longer need rifles for protection in the wild, a swift kick in the nads will disuade any marauding bear from further attack.

  11. Hilarious!

    And here comes spoilsport. We who get ours from Norwegian salmon farms, know that only the King and his buddies catch wild salmon in our rivers. We get the farmed. Do you believe this company?
    More trivia available on request. Get in line! Get in line!

    But it was funny. Wonder where they got hold of so many bear suits?

  12. Next time bring Kathy Griffin along to go downtown … the bear will forget about the salmon and The Dood can abscond with it.

  13. The Framers of the Constitution and Bill of Rights were dyslexic. The Right To Arm Bears…..

  14. What a great way to start the day… Now to the drudgery of Timeslips. Like Al Bundy – someone pass the Pepto…

  15. Very funny, just as it was in 2005 when it was first posted to Youtube. Still, always great to see classics rediscovered.

  16. Hilarious. It seems some of the most creative minds are employed ro sell us stuff.

Comments are closed.