Finger-Licking Fatwa: Indian Muslim Cleric Issues Fatwa Against Eating Kentucky Fried Chicken

160px-kfc_logosvgIndian clerics have issued a fatwa asking Muslims that they must not eat Kentucky Fried Chicken (KFC), which is now deemed a sin against Islamic law. The reason is the failure to kill chickens in front of Muslims.

KFC chicken is now deemed haram by the clerics. Dargah-e-Ala Hazrat cleric Salim Noori proclaimed “The halal certificates displayed at these stores have no relevance as they do not give details about the procedure that they follow to process the meat.”

So Popcorn Chicken is now beyond the reach of the faithful until every chicken is killed before a Muslim.

37 thoughts on “Finger-Licking Fatwa: Indian Muslim Cleric Issues Fatwa Against Eating Kentucky Fried Chicken”

  1. “You can produce more caloric content per acre with arable than with pasture, FWIW. The thing is, a great deal of land is not suitable for arable farming (or not suitable absent irrigation works)”.
    Thanks for making my point even better than I did.
    Not enough arable land is in short supply, but water is even in shorter supply. Also, you just try to get people off sugar, snacks, BBQ wings, etc, and you will have riots in the streets the like that you have never seen. In other words, FOOD POLICE, leave us the hell alone! Oops, did I forget to mention King Michael Bloomberg?
    It’s funny that when you have so much money that you just know what is good for all of the other dumb people. HA!

  2. AD,
    Their ritual purity, as you call it, is a moving line of ritual purity which has been demonstrated countless times.
    Just like the ritual purity of Muslims marrying children as young as 9, as was a recent ruling in Pakistan where the Council of Islamic Ideology, a constitutional body which gives advice to parliament on the compatibility of laws with Sharia, appeared to slap down the legislation after deeming it “un-Islamic” which proposed raising the marriage age for females from 16 to 18.

    Then there is this: A 60 year-old Muslim cleric was arrested in Afghanistan’s central Ghor province after he married a 6 year-old girl.
    The cleric said the girl was a “religious gift” from her parents.

    If you get ritual purity from his, you could be a child molester.

  3. Somehow this fits with religious zeal. Don’t eat pork, shellfish, etc. Don’t do this or that regardless of what it means. Anyone who listens to these idiots is a potential danger.

    You’re not in any danger because Shlomo Abramowitz won’t eat shellfish, lives in an eruv district, and takes the lightbulb out of his refrigerator on Friday afternoon. You just have a bad attitude, which is a threat to Shlomo Abramowitz when people like you are gifted with judicial positions.

    1. Art Deco – Mr Abramowitz did not declare a fatwa on all my local fast-food chicken places.

  4. How much more land would that require to be used for growing and harvesting crops.

    You can produce more caloric content per acre with arable than with pasture, FWIW. The thing is, a great deal of land is not suitable for arable farming (or not suitable absent irrigation works).

  5. The absolute ignorance of Islamic clerics

    You fancy they’re ‘ignorant’ of their own standards of ritual purity? Why?

  6. “Better for the environment to eat no meat at all”. Really?
    How much more land would that require to be used for growing and harvesting crops. Not to mention the unproven health aspects of GMO crops.
    No matter, I prefer a T-bone.

  7. Nick they are already up to George Hamilton as the “Crispy Colonel “

  8. I look forward to the day when these disturbed clown clerics start issuing fatwas against disturbed clown clerics. But disturbed clown cleric actions will continue to reach epic proportions until their flock realizes that these fools are nothing more than blowhard idiots.

    I am reminded of the Woody Allen movie Bananas,

    [youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EV4N2dk0cMk&w=560&h=315%5D

  9. Somehow this fits with religious zeal. Don’t eat pork, shellfish, etc. Don’t do this or that regardless of what it means. Anyone who listens to these idiots is a potential danger. It’s somewhat of a double edged sword with the zeal applied to something so ridiculous as KFC but also being used to persuade religious zealots to kill and maim. If only it was all about the chicken.

    It’s like the sheet wearing. On the one hand basic rights protects a person’s right to wear whatever but that person is, in actuality, waving a flag, making a statement, saying that they believe in this mumbo jumbo so fervently that when they go swimming they wrap themselves in a sheet. It’s an ‘in your face’ moment. It’s not much different than: punk, goth, skinhead, beatle haircut, crewcut, Halloween, etc. If only people would grow out of it. When deprivations, despair, and mumbo jumbo get together, it sometimes eclipses chicken.

  10. Roscoe, I’ll have hang on to that for the future. “Liberal Fatwa”s!

  11. Fine. Don’t eat any chickens. Better for the environment to eat no meat at all.

  12. New phrase for the Urban Dictionary for Older White Guys:
    “Food Fatwa”
    A term used to describe draconian measures taken against eating particular foods like carbonated beverages and fried foods. Originally implemented by former New York mayor Michael Bloomberg.
    Currently used by radical muslim clerics.

  13. The absolute ignorance of Islamic clerics would be comical if it weren’t for their level of pure stupidity. Islam should not ever be mistaken for being a religion, it is a political movement that is purely Demonic by its own nature and anyone who would follow it is both totally ignorant and insane as well as evil themselves.

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