Exposing Oneself To Art: Police Seek To Find Stolen Swan After Reviewing Bizarre Videotape

download-2There are some people who talk about exposing themselves to art and then there is Ronald Thompson, 47.  Thompson was arrested after a surveillance video in Lakeland, Florida showed him driving away from a storage center with a large stolen swan art piece.  Oh, yes, I forgot . . . he was driving a stolen truck . . . and he was buck naked.  Indeed, but for the modestly placed white bucket, the images would not be fit for a family blog like ours.


Thompson was arrested nearby but without either clothes or swan.  The truck was not far way.  Here is the unique announcement from the  Polk County Sheriff’s Department:

The man seen here in video surveillance (yes, he’s naked – no, we don’t know why) stole a truck from Lakeland Cold Storage during the evening hours of May 19-20, 2017, that had a 5′ tall black & white checkered swan in the bed of it. The swan is sponsored by Aspyre. We found the stolen truck in Hillsborough County, and we identified the suspect, but the swan is still missing.

The swan has since been recoverd.

The five-foot, black and white checkered swan named “Aspyre” is worth $25,000.  The truck was worth around $18,000.  Stealing “Aspyre” while naked in a stolen truck? Priceless.

13 thoughts on “Exposing Oneself To Art: Police Seek To Find Stolen Swan After Reviewing Bizarre Videotape”

  1. The harlequin swan is beautiful, if a bit in the taste of the Red Queen.

    I suspect drugs. Whenever someone runs around naked, and they are not streaming, they seem to always be high. What a train wreck. Can you imagine the “what are you in for” prison conversations?

    1. Karen – if he shows them pictures of the swan, he will get points for creativity. 🙂

  2. Of late Florida is becoming a refuge of bucket heads of many types. Hopefully Sheriff Judd will keep him on ice and give him a bus ticket to California where I’m sure he will be at home with art lovers of his type.

  3. Other than the clothing thing and the stealing the truck, the swan was worth stealing. 🙂 Personally, I like it. <3

  4. As a point of English language usage ….

    There seems to be two different adjectives applying to the lack of clothing:
    Some say “buck naked.”
    Some say “butt naked.”

    Confusion? Regional cultural differences? Political orientation?

    1. I grew up in CA hearing “buck naked.” I think that is the original. “Butt naked” I believe, is much more recent, perhaps coined by younger people who misheard or didn’t understand “buck” naked, because I doubt If many of the snowflake generation have ever been hunting or even known what a buck is.

  5. A naked man who steals a truck…
    Is like a jilted man who needs to ruck.
    When he steals a painted swan..
    He falls in love with Goldie Hawn.
    If I may and if I might..
    Steal a swan with Goldie’s height.
    O U T spells Out and out you go.

  6. One pays good money to go to the famous museums in Europe to view buck naked statuary. As a family.

  7. Ask Jared Kushner about it. Ask the Russians about it. It’s all one, huge and massive conspiracy to deprive us of our black and white, checkerboard swans.

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