When Monks Attack: Christian Monks Have Massive Brawl at Holy Site

180px-holy_sepulchre_exteriorThis could be a new Fox Special “When Monks Attack.” As Jews and Muslims fight of the location of the new Museum of Tolerance, Christian monks were having an actual brawl at the Church of the Holy Sepulcher on Sunday. Monks from the Greek Orthodox and Armenian denominations were preparing for a ceremony at the Church of the Holy Sepulcher in the Old City when they went at each other like Templar Knights.

The different sects share control of the church and often have sharp disagreements. However, an actual monk fight of this size remains relatively rare.

In some ways, this is quite efficient given the close proximity of confessional services. Authorities may try to quell future tension by getting the monks to work together on a joint project. A joint production of West Side Story would appear a good choice and here, for instructional purposes, is the Sharks and the Jets video.

For the story, click here and here and here.

8 thoughts on “When Monks Attack: Christian Monks Have Massive Brawl at Holy Site”

  1. steadycat,

    If you look at the history of gods and goddesses, even in the bible–there are always some sort of god(dess) “smack downs”, so maybe the followers ARE acting like their god(dess). Jerry Springer could be helping Yahweh come to terms with Baal, so Yahweh doesn’t have to keep ordering the golden calf melted down. Yahweh needs to share more. Perhaps he needs more “me time” to get in touch with his inner child, so he won’t have to turn people into pillars of salt and destroy quite so many cities etc.

  2. What? How can they expect regular people to evolve when the ones supposedly trained to be like god fight as if they’re on a Jerry Springer show? *whispers* I’m sorry, but I laughed.

  3. Wow! So much love for your neighbor on display for the whole world to see. What would Jesus think? By the way, I agree with Jill, the Shaolin monks would clean their clocks.

  4. Well, I Never! I for one was ecclesiastically offended, especially on the Sabbath, at this forum’s callous and irreligious hypocrisy because of some members’ despicably *sacrilegious* acts of betting money on the outcome of which Jesus-lovin’, church-fightin’ mon…uh,er, never mind…

  5. He’s MY Jesus!

    No! He’s MINE!

    Yours? He wouldn’t save you if you had coupons tattooed on your skin!

    (insert sound of scuffle here)

    Children, you – as in both groups – you do realize Jesus would not find a lot of humor in your actions, right?

    Behave. Be ashamed while you’re at it.

  6. I see the genesis of a SNL skit coming here. Dancing Ito’s move over. It’s now the fighting monks of our Lady of Tolerance!

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