The good people at Christwire have finally identified the threat to both this nation and its collective soul. It is not Al Qaeda or gay gym teachers. It is Stephen Colbert. Stephenson Billings who bills himself as an Investigative Journalist, Motivational Children’s Party Entertainer and Antique Soda Bottle Collector has written a widely circulated column that uncovers Colbert for what he is: an insidious and corrupting threat to all that we hold dear in this nation.
There has been an on-going debate about whether Christwire is an onion-like satire, here. If so, it is brilliant because many of the readers clearly believe it is true, including a story on why Blacks are a danger to America, here. I think that it must be satire which makes it all the more intriguing given the comments that follow.
Billings lays out Colbert’s villainy in plain terms:
Let me state this very clearly: Stephen Colbert represents one of the most dangerous trends in America next to Islamic terrorism today! He is slipping a deadly tonic of anarchy and immorality to our children. His nightly show is like an Al Qaeda training camp, indoctrinating fragile minds into a fanatical hatred of American values and arming them with the doublespeak, laziness and opportunism to destroy this country’s economic and moral foundation. Materialism is his Lord, not spirituality, nor any commitment to bettering this country. And Colbert’s need for media attention and control over the young is insatiable.
He draws analogies to Hitler — who appeared hampered by the absence of his own show on Comedy Central:
Over the last few years, Colbert has subtly been building a cult of personality, Stalin-style! With trinkets, books (remember Mao’s Little Red Book anyone? Anyone?) and artwork. The paintings he has commissioned, much like the ones we saw of Saddam Hussein all over Iraq, portray him as an iconic and heroic figure, draped in the flag and representing some great promise for America. Well, I’ll tell you, Adolph Hitler promised a whole lot to Germany. Anyone remember how that ended? America’s youths don’t… Cults of Personality are always dangerous, they try to get people to disregard the real issues and throw their unbridled and sexualized devotion behind one man, no matter what rabbit hole he may lead them down.
Billings’ warning are all the more frightening when one watches the combination of Hitler and cable television:
“Sexualized devotion”? There can be little disagreement over the fact that Colbert is “slipping a deadly tonic of anarchy and immorality to our children.” Just read the comment section where “Abe” noted “How many childs burn in hell on account of this man? I wish stoning were still legal.” Of course, it is still legal Abe. One just has to go to those God-fearing leaders in Iran.
LeAnne explains that this is all clearly laid out in the Bible:
It seems like America’s Children have forgotten the Ten Commandents, particularly the part about: ‘You shall have no other gods before Me.’ Hear that you Colbert worshippers?
And God’s prediction that man’s creations will come to destroy bear some repeating here: “Thus were they defiled with their own works, and went a whoring with their own inventions.” –Psalms 106:39
That’s exactly right! This TV whore has set his sights on eating America’s soul. And here are a few words on FALSE PROPHETS from the BIBLE which I think apply here:
“I have seen also in the prophets of Jerusalem an horrible thing: they commit adultery, and walk in lies: they strengthen also the hands of evildoers, that none doth return from his wickedness: they are all of them unto me as Sodom, and the inhabitants thereof as Gomorrah.” –Jer 23:14
“When a prophet speaketh in the name of the LORD, if the thing follow not, nor come to pass, that is the thing which the LORD hath not spoken, but the prophet hath spoken it presumptuously: thou shalt not be afraid of him.” –Deu 18:22
And Colbert’s money motivation, the BIBLE talks about false prophets lust for wealth, too:
“Her leaders judge for a bribe, her priests teach for a price, and her prophets tell fortunes for money. Yet they lean upon the LORD and say, “Is not the LORD among us? No disaster will come upon us.” –Micah 3:11 [NIV]
Just thought I’d add God’s two cents!!!
Someone has to add “God’s two cents.” We know Colbert won’t.
For the full Billings article, click here.
Actually I am now of the Opinion Colbert may be the FALSE PROPHET (False = FAKE Prophet = NEWSGIVER combined = “FAKE NEWSGIVER” and RAJ PATEL (who appeared with Colbert mocking the idea on The Colbert Report that he was SHARE INTERNATIONAL ..aka.. LUCIS TRUST aka LUCIFER TRUST)is the prime candidate for Anti-Christ.
Lucifer/Satanail is the “Father of lies” thus for Colbert (false prophet) and RAJ (meaning “king”) PATEL ( little head / “farmer”) .. Thus when both deny their “positions” it is a way of mocking truth (which is the way of darkness).
For now people jokingly chant “Stephen Stephen” and almost worship him… More people are said to watch and believe what is reported on the Colbert Report and Daily Show than the regular news.
RAJ’s true time is not yet come.. First we need a famine (which the BP SPILL/DRAGON from the GULF/ABYSS should accomplish).. which will deminish the surplus population and provide a means for PATEL to save us.
~a~ witness
Stephenson Billings doesn’t know a journalistic story from a Pop Tart.
I think LeAnne’s comment was satire too. People who really believe what he/she was writing usually do not have the highest of educations (it’s a generalization, I know). This person used “an” before a word that started with an “h” (horrible… although in writing it’s probably more common to use “a”). The trend I see in people not so keen on the intricacies of the language is to always merely use an “a”. So with that in mind, I think possibly the person does care about intricacies, and therefore my generalization says that it must be in jest.
Lotta,
I checked out the Landover Baptist site. Having been raised around Baptists I have but one thing to say . . .
Hilarious.
But two, two things to say . . .
Thanks. 😀
Yes, Christwire IS satire and yes it IS brilliant! I have been known to engage in Christwire comments/discussions with those who (somehow) believe it to be a genuine website and get rather ‘lathered’ at the content.
seamus: “…Landover Baptist’s web site. Praise Jebus.”
Right, what Seamus said. One of the funniest sites around (if you like that sort of satire) but I wonder how many fundies end up there and think it’s a real site? Sometime satire is too close to the truth to be distinguishable to the common-sense impaired.
http://www.landoverbaptist.org/
Not for the faint of heart- the way to true Christian sexuality: http://www.landoverbaptist.org/subjectarchive/sex.html
Slarti,
You are correct, sir. A facial hair deficiency does not make a deficient man. My apologies to Dr. Colbert.
Buddha,
That should be Sir Stephen Colbert, Doctor of Fine Arts.
Congrats, Mr. Colbert!
Your place in the history of far right nut baggery is now assured.
But seriously. You should work on the mustache to highlight your Stalinesque qualities. You look far too friendly to be the Anti-Christ and be taken seriously without it.
If you like the kind of comedy hijinx found on Christwire then I highly recommend a peek at Landover Baptist’s web site. Praise Jebus.
This guy’s not only onto something, it looks like the evil Colbert is about to take his insidious message global. (Glenn Beck will have the details tonight, I’m sure)
“NASA will broadcast a special message from comedian Stephen Colbert on Monday, Aug. 24, as the space shuttle Discovery prepares to deliver the COLBERT treadmill to the International Space Station.
The message will air on NASA Television after the shuttle’s fueling commentary concludes at approximately 7:15 p.m. EDT.
The name Colbert received the most entries in NASA’s online poll to name the station’s Node 3 module, so NASA named its new space station treadmill the Combined Operational Load Bearing External Resistance Treadmill, or COLBERT. NASA named the module Tranquility.” (link at sig)
Seriously, however, I feel sorry for Stephen, and Jon. It’s gotta be difficult to satirize these people anymore. The report that we spent tax dollars to threaten to kill detainees families doesn’t even register with these “Christians,” but they’re sure Colbert’s character (a parody of their heroes) is the anti-Christ since they don’t get the joke.
They make his point perfectly, so well, in fact, that it’s a little scary.
NASA thinks highly of Colbert, last nights Shuttle launch carried the Stephen Colbert Tread Mill. The guys famous. He’s gone to space the final frontier, further than any man has gone before.
You just don’t understand, they have to have converts to pay the mortgage on the mega-churches.
Stephenson Billings lived at “C Street” a wee bit too long.
http://blogdredd.blogspot.com/2009/08/family-on-catastrophe-street.html
Colbert was wonderful at the unplanned Bush II Roast press conference a few years back. Bush II was pissed!
This is very funny. But Christwire looks like a joke itself, a parody or satire of extreme right wing religious nuts, just as Colbert is a parody of right wing TV hosts. See the bio:
“Stephenson Billings is an Investigative Journalist, Motivational Children’s Party Entertainer and Antique Soda Bottle Collector all in one special, blessed package!”
At least one site, Outraged Richard, has charged that it is another “Landover Baptist,” a sort of Onion for religious sites.
http://outragedrichard.com/home/fake-or-real-the-truth-behind-christwireorg-landoverbaptistorg-theonioncom-fake-satire-exposed-atheists-and-immoral-liberals-use-reverse-psychology-to-promote-gays-and-homosexual-agenda/
Maybe Richard is a parody, too. Where will it all end? But in the meantime, enjoy
Although I doubt that Mr. Billings appreciates irony, what struck me most about his comments (aside from his obsession with homosexuality) is that they can be read as a satirical attack on the most absurd aspects of fundamentalist religion. If he’s not careful, Mr. Billings will receive an invitation to appear on the Colbert Report.
I’ll bet Colbert is wishing he wasn’t on vacation. No doubt this will occupy a special place on his show. I had heard that many conservatives think he is actually conservative, but now he has the anti-Christ camp too.
This Billings sounds like one sick individual. They’re going to find a box of kid’s underwear in this guy’s closet…
This sort of irrational religiosity is really starting to freak me out. OK, I concede that religion is irrational. Perhaps I mean that the way it is often used for malignent purposes is very upsetting. To see the anti-Christ is Steven Colbert is like seeing the anti-Christ in Dick Cheney. Uups. Bad comparison of analogies.