Which of These Two Beings Is More Likely to Get You a Date?

150px-Bertrand_Russell_1950

god
god
Looking for that tall, dark, and atheist date? You are not alone. Discover Magazine has learned that if you want to pick up a date you might want to drop the Almighty in your pitch. It appears that being an atheist increases the chance of getting lucky — at least in this lifetime. That means that, while God remains popular for a Sunday morning, Bertrand Russell may be better on a Friday night.


god-chart

This chart suggests that the biggest turn off (outside of Christian dating sites) is a reference to God. Thus, pick up lines like “God wants us to hook up” or “Dating me will bring you closer to God” are no longer popular choices.

For example, this entry from christiandatingforfree, does not do so well outside of the religious set:

blueskyky
I am an outgoing person. I like to read books, love to travel, and go to see movies. I go to the church every Sunday and adoration chapel sometimes. I am honest and respectful. I am looking for someone like me.

Here is the correct edit for blueskyky according to the Discover study:

blueskyky
I am an outgoing person. I like to read soulless books, love to travel to secular sites, and go to see irreverent movies. I go to the Nascar every Sunday and self-adoration sessions sometimes. I am honest and skeptical. I am looking for someone like me.

Nevertheless, over at www.meetchristiansingles.com, they insist that the Almighty is the best matchmaker (working of course through their Internet service):

We define ” actively dating ” as diligently searching a dating service to find Christian singles for Christian dating. Actively writing to them instead of just passively waiting for someone to answer your Christian Personals Ad. If you are not currently dating anyone then let’s get started! Pray for God’s best. He won’t let you down when it comes to Dating or anything else in your life! God is the best Matchmaker there is, period.

However, it appears that name-dropping Bertrand Russell won’t hurt either.

For the story, click here.

20 thoughts on “Which of These Two Beings Is More Likely to Get You a Date?”

  1. Jonathan, I would like to apologize to you directly as well. As Gyges pointed out, I didn’t have my sense of humor with me when I read it. I do respect you greatly and only made a fool out of myself. I apologize for the profanity as well. Keep on protecting civil liberties! I remain a fan.

  2. gyges,

    In re the Venus pick-up line:

    You sir are a global risk to a daughter’s sexual abstinence and fathers across the land rejoiced the day you got married. Good day.

  3. “However, it appears that name-dropping Bertrand Russell won’t hurt either.”
    ________________________________

    Well, women sure say Oh God! a sight more than Oh Bertrand!

  4. I was just wondering how agnostics would rate on the “Getting Lucky” graph. I’m partial to men who question the existence of an Almighty being.

    Oh wait, I’m already married to an agnostic. That’s one more Emily Litella moment for me! Never mind.

  5. I don’t know but a’lookin’ at them 2 photographs, both feller’s is uglier than Sin…did they have kids? If so, I wonder what they looked like…

  6. This isn’t exactly a dating story but I did meet a woman today and complimented her on her really cute purple skirt. She told me she had wanted a pink one but felt she was too old for pink. But she could wear purple because that was the color of her king. I honestly didn’t know what she meant. Elvis? Was she British? I finally got it!!! I certainly understand how god talk might be offputting, although she also told me god had fixed her fax machine, so if god is going to actually help out once and a while, then maybe I should reconsider worshipping him and saving $40.00 on fax repairs!

  7. Ah and the conversation (d?)evolves into pickup lines that require a classical education to understand.

    “Excuse me miss, do you have a fulcrum? Because I have a lever of sufficient length if you’d like to feel the earth move.”

  8. Though I am a Bruin, I am a Michigander! How bout that kid, Tate Forcier? When he hangs up his cleets at the ‘Big House’, he will be an iconic figure in the great history of Michigan football. Go Blue!

  9. Gygees:

    “Without arms you’d look just like the Venus de Milo.”

    *********************

    Leave it to you to have the ultimate pickup line!

  10. JT,

    I’m insulted by your insinuation that Atheists like Nascar. Everyone knows that they stay at home to route for those heathen, dirty cheaters: The Raiders.

    Buddha and Mespo,

    I’m a big fan of the classic: Without arms you’d look just like the Venus de Milo.

  11. I don’t know. I’ve had pretty good luck with the line, “Hi, I’m the reincarnation of the Roman god Bacchus and I’ll be your entertainment for the evening. You ladies may be familiar with other parties I’ve catered under the name Dionysus. Mostly Greek food and little more restrained than this joint, but what can you do? Rowdy people have rowdy parties. Can I get either of you a drink?” While not as smooth (or brief) as the teapot line I’ll confess, perhaps which god you mention and the context should be a factor in this analysis.

  12. Hmm, I cannot comment at this time due to graphic language which would not be appropriate on the web blawg.

  13. Well, I must admit, I’ve opened many a relationship with the line, “Hey, sweetie, do you want to come to my house and see my orbiting teapot?”

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