Will Toucan Sam Sing on the Stand? Man Sues Kellogg’s Over Fruitless “Froot”

FrootloopsboxRoy Werbel was shocked, shocked when he found no fruit in his froot loops. Werbel is suing Kellogg’s because he believed Toucan Sam when he declared: “Follow my nose! It always knows! The flavor of froot! Wherever it grows!” Werbel insists that he reasonably assumed “froot” was “fruit.”

Werbel filed in San Francisco federal court alleging that Kellogg’s and its accomplice Toucan Sam misled him. He presumably intends to break Sam on the stand and have him sign in front of a shocked fruit-deprived jury.

crunch-berriesWerbel’s complaint insists that “Froot Loops contained no fruit, he would not have purchased it.” The complaint also establishes Werbel may be the biggest breakfast chump since Count Chocula. He is also claiming that he bought Cap’n Crunch Crunch Berries and found no berries.

200px-Bear_claw_pastry.JPGWhile Werbel has been denounced as a nut or frivolous litigant, I find him an inspiration. I am announcing today that I am suing local pastry shops for serving me “Bear claws” that contain not a single ounce of real bear. I will not even get into my lifetime disappointment over so-called “hot dogs.”

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12 thoughts on “Will Toucan Sam Sing on the Stand? Man Sues Kellogg’s Over Fruitless “Froot””

  1. LMAO. Oh my god I’ve never laughed so hard in my whole life at what a complete fool this guy is. At first I thought it was some sort of joke or something, but this is just completely insane. I mean, every SANE person knows that consumer companies go through extreme lengths in the marketing of their products, that’s why one needs to carefully read the fine print. I could understand a child being upset over something like this. I remember how upset I was when, at 8 years old I found out that Apple Jacks didn’t contain real apple, but this man is an adult and really ought to know better.

  2. Could be there is no room for fruit with all the sugar (41% according to this linked article written by Jim Hightower) and artificial dyes.
    http://www.illinoistimes.com/Springfield/article-6379-a-ldsmart-choicerd-that-isnrst.html

    “Yellow 5, Red 40, and six other widely used artificial colorings are linked to hyperactivity and behavior problems in children and should be prohibited from use in foods, according to the nonprofit Center for Science in the Public Interest.”
    http://www.cspinet.org/new/200806022.html

  3. What a moron! If you don’t read the ingredients list before buying something, you have no excuse for complaining. This is a frivolous law suit, if I’ve ever heard one.

  4. Is that a subliminal clown on Cap’n Crunch’s pants, or is it just me?

  5. “Werbel filed in San Francisco federal court alleging that Kellogg’s and its accomplice Toucan Sam misled him. He presumably intends to break Sam on the stand and have him sign in front of a shocked fruit-deprived jury.”

    *******************

    And to think that SFO is not fruity enough or not missing any fruits and to think that there is no more milk.

    This is not intended to offend any persons or person of the same sex union. This does not include the catholic priests.

  6. Cooking is a little like baseball. Sometimes a shortage of ingredients can cause a substitution. In fact, the original Jezebel Sauce recipe called for one and ha half Jezebels, but you can substitute one harlot and half a strumpet. Or pineapple preserves. They all work, but real natural Jezebels are the best if you can get them but they are southern and seasonal. I guess the moral of the story is you really don’t know what you’re eating unless you make it yourself.

    Here’s some amateur Yankee’s take on it made with pineapple preserves (100% Jezebel free).

    http://allrecipes.com/Recipe/Jezebel-Sauce/Detail.aspx

  7. How old is this guy? 11? They show pictures of the cereal on TV and usually on kids programing. He reminds me of the judge in D.C. who tried to sue a dry cleaner for Tens of Thousands of dollars over a lost pair of pants. RIDICULOUS! It’s no wonder our courts are so packed with cases, there’s no longer such a thing as a speedy trial because of folks wanting attention.
    Professor, is it true there’s no bear in bear claws? Say it isn’t so.

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