Kiss Shuts Down Newark Airport

It appears that the security scare that led to shutting down Newark was due to a last minute kiss by a man who stepped over the line of a checkpoint. The amorous gesture led to a pile up at the airport and has now doubt led TSA to recommend kissing zones for passengers.

The man reportedly slipped into a secure area to give a woman one last goodbye kiss at the C-1 security checkpoint. A TSA officer was supposed to be standing in the area and the woman raised a rope to allow the man to go underneath to allow them to walk hand-in-hand toward the boarding area. It was a pretty stupid thing to do but the result was a terminal case of affection for everyone in Terminal C to share.

I am waiting for the new calls by Peter King or Lt. General Tom McInerney that TSA crackdown on Muslims kissing in light of the security alert, here.

For the full story, click here.

34 thoughts on “Kiss Shuts Down Newark Airport”

  1. Dietary iodine intake is obligatory for the production of thyroid hormones. Despite substantial public health advances over the past 3 decades, iodine deficiency currently affects 1.92 billion people globally.1 Dietary iodine requirements are increased during pregnancy due to increased thyroid hormone production, increased renal iodine losses, and fetal iodine requirements.2 Dietary requirements remain increased in lactation due to the concentration of iodine in breast milk.,

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  3. Sen. Lautenberg of NJ posted the airport security video.

    At 0:56 the TSA officer gets up to chase away a guy away who’s obstructing the exit.

    At 4:52 the TSA officer gets up to chase another guy away, and then the intruder makes his move at 5:40, assisted by his girlfriend. Its obvious from his body language he knew he was not supposed to do that.

  4. OK here’s what you do:

    You pack a huge bottle of iodine supplement tablets in your bag. And a big bottle of ammonia. Not the sudsy kind- that won’t work. Just the straight up ammonia in water kind. When you go through security, tell them you work as a janitor for a living, and you have goiter.

    If they confiscate your ammonia, grab a bottle from a janitor closet in the secure area. They have to be somewhere. Certainly the janitors don’t go through security every day with mops and buckets. You can probably find a bottle of ammonia in a men’s room or a women’s room somewhere in those little shops.

    At the gate, quickly swallow all the iodine pills in the bottle. Board the plane with your bottle of ammonia.

    Once you’re in the air, just gurgle down the entire bottle of ammonia while you remain comfortably in your seat. This could be tough; you should practice beforehand with vodka to toughen your system.

    Once someone taps you on the shoulder to ask WTF is up with the ammonia, you’ll explode into a billion pieces.

  5. “I seem to recall a skit of some years ago (maybe The Three Stooges) when one of them supposedly drank nitro glycerine.

    Why vomit? Just run and dive.”

    Yes, as I recall Doctor Smith was tricked into drinking an explosive liquid by a devious alien (Wally Cox), on Lost in Space.

    Guess its an old plot.

    Of course who needs to run and jump? At that point you could just get one of the passengers to punch you in the stomach.

  6. empirecookie/link,

    Thank you, that is priceless footage, I can’t stop laughing either. 🙂

  7. I seem to recall a skit of some years ago (maybe The Three Stooges) when one of them supposedly drank nitro glycerine.

    Why vomit? Just run and dive.

  8. Canadians, eh? Always trying to be practical. Sometimes it just doesn’t work out so well…

  9. Oh hell, I was going to ask you what kinda meds they gave you? Some are just better than others and not all the same. Some cause you to need to be locked up, yet again.

    But then some dance to remember, some dance to forget. And as James Morrison said, No one gets out of here alive….

  10. empirecookie,

    Do you have papers that say so. I seem to remember trashing mine as soon as I got out of the Hospital. LOL

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