New and Improved Terror: Taliban Announces It Will Drop Use of Tongue Cuttings, School Bombings, and Suicide Bombings (Against Civilians)

The war on terror just got more dangerous. The Taliban has actual image consultations and is now rebranding the organization in a kindler and gentler image. In a new code of conduct, Mullah Muhammad Omar has ordered that the organization will now forego such signature methods as suicide bombings against civilians, burning down schools, or cutting off ears, lips and tongues. Next the Taliban will announce that it is starting a Terror for Tots program to reach out to underprivileged children. Wait, they already have that program.

The new code seems to be an effort to gain a broader level of support for the organization. What is curious is that school bombings and tongue-cuttings are not actually things that you change like a logo selection.

It is like saying we will no longer try to win the hearts and minds of people by tearing out their hearts and brains.

For the full story, click here.

6 thoughts on “New and Improved Terror: Taliban Announces It Will Drop Use of Tongue Cuttings, School Bombings, and Suicide Bombings (Against Civilians)”

  1. This is an interesting turn of events. He (Mullah Mohammed Omar) may be taking a much longer view than the linked article discusses. He would not be the first leader in the Mideast to rehabilitate his own image and rise to power with his (militant) organization having been legitimized and mainstreamed over time.

    That he is taking this step may indicate a desire to develop a legitimate (to outside eyes) and more moderate political force (divorced from ties with Al-Qaeda) and regain control of Afghanistan through a political process that would be recognized internally and internationally.

    (bio excerpts from Wikipedia- very abbreviated:
    “Menachem Begin … was an Israeli politician and the sixth prime minister of the State of Israel. Before the independence, he was the leader of the Zionist militant Irgun, a revisionist breakaway from the larger mainstream Jewish paramilitary organization Haganah. He proclaimed a revolt, on February 1, 1944, against the British mandatory government, which was opposed by the Jewish Agency. He played a significant role in Jewish resistance against the British control in the waning years of the mandate, leading the more militant Zionists.

    Yasser Arafat, … was a Palestinian leader and a Laureate of the Nobel Prize. He was Chairman of the Palestine Liberation Organization (PLO), President of the Palestinian National Authority (PNA), and leader of the Fatah political party,

    Mullah Mohammed Omar … often simply called Mullah Omar, is the leader of the Taliban of Afghanistan and was Afghanistan’s de facto head of state, and was recognized by three states, from 1996 to 2001, under the official title of Head of the Supreme Council. …
    After the NATO invasion of Afghanistan began in 2001 (Enduring Freedom), Omar went into hiding and is still at large. “

  2. How do you know about your teacher’s “dirty looks” if she’s wearing a burqua?

  3. Well how can you say Towel bin and Gee Had if you don’t have no tongue?

  4. Stop the suicide bombings and cutting off ears, lips and tongues, that’s all fine by me.

    But do they have to stop burning the schools? It’s not like school’s ever done anyone any good, is it? Do NOT ask Pat Robertson.

  5. While the ban on cutting out tongues and similar, sounds unsurprising, I’m skeptical that they really would stop destroying schools, particularly girls’ schools.

    As for cutting back on suicide bombings against civilians, that sounds like it’s just driven by fundamental management needs. What kind of organization can sustain sending it’s trained “staff” out on suicide missions with any frequency?

    What’s next? Will they hire someone like A<<enture! to rebrand themselves, following the lead of Altria (formerly Philip Morris tobacco)? How about "Talibueno!"? If the terrorism/fundamentalism thing doesn't work out, they could open a chain of fajita "restaurants".

    (I notice that your piece links to a NYT article – it will be interesting to see if they really do push themselves into irrelevance behind a pay-wall..)

  6. No more tongue cuttings! No more school bombings! No more suicide bombings!

    Next thing you know they’ll be cutting back on the number of virgins rewarded.

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