Real Muslims Don’t Wear Mullets

Now you can finally have hair like Mahmoud Ahmadinejad. The Iranian government has released the results of a list of acceptable and banned hair styles for men.

The Ministry of Culture has released the listing and pictures of proper Iranian hair styles to fight “decadent Western cuts.” Those Satanic hairstyles include ponytails, mullets and elaborate spikes.

Officials were quick to point out the “journal of Iranian hairstyles approved by the ministry of [culture and Islamic] guidance” was previewed at a government-approved hairdressing show in Tehran. That should be good enough for anyone.

Hair Czar Jaleh Khodayar, who heads the Modesty and Veil Festival, insists “[t]he proposed styles are inspired by Iranians’ complexion, culture and religion, and Islamic law.”

To drive home the point, the Iranian government has shutdown barber shops giving Western cuts.

This follows the crackdown on improperly veiled women in Iran.

Source: Telegraph.

12 thoughts on “Real Muslims Don’t Wear Mullets”

  1. Buddha,

    I gotcha. I’d have a “spooky action at a distance” if I saw a fella with a mullet walking in my direction down the street. It would definitely be a case of my moving swiftly the other way. Don’t know if said mullet wearer would notice any Doppler effect. In any case, E=mc2 would certainly apply to my movement: Elaine=Mercury’s celerity squared.

  2. Elaine,

    I’ve pondered your question and the problem(s) of cause and effect seems as inextricable as it is unexplainable in re the mullet.

    So I’m taking a page from quantum mechanics and I’m going with the “spooky action at a distance” option and answering . . .

    “yes”.

  3. The mullet is indeed the devils work and sharia justice must be carried out without exception.

  4. Buddha,

    I know a good retina specialist. Let me know if you want her name.

    Answer a question for me: Do only unattractive men wear mullets–or do men look unattractive because they’re wearing mullets?

    Of course, a muscle shirt is the one form of attire that MUST be worn along with a mullet. No button down oxford shirts for these macho men!

  5. Elaine,

    I’m laughing hysterically, but I think that may have damaged my retinas.

  6. Gyges,
    Great song and great group. that really brought back a lot of memories. and most of them are real! I think Mr. I Am Mad in the Head would look much better in a mullet.

  7. Look at these fellas with mullets. Be still my heart!

    [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9f-Ts34ORPg&hl=en_US&fs=1]

  8. I’d just add that no one with any sense of style would EVER wear a mullet! Mullets should be outlawed in the US too!

    😉

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