Packers Joke of the Day

Yes, it is time for our Packers Joke of the Day.


Given today’s game, I thought I would include a couple extra:

Q: What do you call 53 men watching the Superbowl?
A: The Green Bay Packers

Q: What do you call a Packer fan with half a brain?
A: Gifted.

Q: How do you keep a Packer out of your yard?
A: Put up a goal post

Q: Why can’t Wisconsin citizens get from Green Bay to Dallas?
A: They can’t get past Chicago

We are getting ready for the big game. I am preparing brats, knackwurst, and kielbasa (cooked in beer) with sauerkraut and potato salad. I am bringing in my Bears Garden gnome for good luck and my Bears banner is fluttering outside the house. All is ready for the greatest match since the dark angels were first forced into their eternal dark dwelling. In what Biblical scholars uniformly agree is a reference to the first Packers game, it was record: “And the angels which kept not their first estate, but left their own habitation, he hath reserved in everlasting chains under darkness unto the judgment of the great day. – Jude 1:6, KJV

For my fellow the Bears players and Bears fans alike, I leave you with these inspiring words:

You are about to embark upon the Great Crusade, toward which we have
striven these many months. The eyes of the world are upon you. The
hopes and prayers of liberty-loving people everywhere march with you.
In company with our brave Allies and brothers-in-arms on
other Fronts, you will bring about the destruction of the Green Bay war
machine, the elimination of Packers tyranny over the oppressed peoples of
the Midwest, and victory for ourselves in a free world.

Your task will not be an easy one. Your enemy is well trained, well
equipped and battle hardened. He will fight savagely.

But this is the year 2010! Much has happened since the Packers triumphs in the regular season. The NFC teams have inflicted upon the Packers great defeats, in open battle, man-to-man. Our air offensive has seriously reduced their strength in the air and their capacity to wage a running game on the ground. Our defensive line has given us an overwhelming superiority in defense and offensive lines, and placed at our disposal great reserves of trained fighting men.

The tide has turned! The free men of the world are marching together to

I have full confidence in your courage and devotion to duty and skill in
battle. We will accept nothing less than full Victory!

Good luck! And let us beseech the blessing of Almighty God upon this great and noble undertaking. Go Bears, Monsters of the Midway, God’s Chosen Team.

Jonathan Turley

25 thoughts on “Packers Joke of the Day”

  1. I owe Professor Turley an apology. So far this year, my support of any football team has been the “kiss of death.” I briefly stated to my two cats this morning that I wanted Chicago in the Super Bowl. As this game has gone on, I have switched allegiances, hoping to give Green Bay the “kiss of death.” Let’s hope I didn’t make the switch too late. Sorry, Bears fans. Go Packers.

  2. Unless…something drastically changes….I predicts that the Bears will not win….just a hunch…

  3. When will the Bears show up….I see they have suited themselves…any chance before the fourth…….of July?

  4. Bdaman,

    Cold doesn’t diminish the beauty – it’s about 15°F (9°F wind chill) here, but the sun is shining off of the snow covered ground – beautiful, in my opinion. And I’ll keep bugging you until you tell me you did it…

  5. Bubba and Emma went to the alter to git hitched the judge said I now pronounce you man and wife you may kiss the bride. The judge turned to the witness and said, she’s big enough to play with the Green Bay Packers. Emma over heard it and said. I aint playin with any other Packer but Bubba’s from hearn on.

  6. Funny:

    “Q: What do you call 53 men watching the Superbowl?
    A: The Green Bay Packers”

  7. The weather is beautiful here in Battle Creek, MI – I hope it’s the same in nearby Chicago. Enjoy your tailgating and I hope you get a Bears victory for dessert!

    Chicago at noon, 19F with a windchill of 7

    Pittsburgh at 1 pm 16F with the windchill at 2

    It’s COLD!!!!!!!

    No but your words keep ringing true in my ears. Maybe next week.
    Buddha’s affirmation helped. I’ll let you know.

  8. I have to go with Blouise, The People’s Prognosticator and Prophet of Professional Pigskin Probabilities who Postulates Packers Pummelling Pittsburgh in the Pinnacle of Playoffs.

    P.S. Pick the Packers and Pocket the Payoff.

    That’s a real Wisconsin cookout you’re preparing- I hope those are Usinger sausages on your grill.

  9. Professor,

    Is the Turley family trebuchet armed and ready to repel the cheesehead horde from the north?

    The weather is beautiful here in Battle Creek, MI – I hope it’s the same in nearby Chicago. Enjoy your tailgating and I hope you get a Bears victory for dessert!

  10. Da Bears will smack the Pack! it is sunny here now, but we just had some snow flurries and the temps are in the single digits. Just right for a Bears Packers game!!

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