Peshmergettes and Paradise: Islamic State Fighters Terrified Of Being Martyred By Women

Flag_of_the_Islamic_State.svgscreen-shot-2014-09-21-at-11-39-59-pm-e1411358791217It is a perilous path to attempt to understand the Islamic State of Iraq and Syria (ISIS) militants who justify massacres and beheadings as the height of moral Islamic conduct. However, the perverted sense of logic that goes into such views continues to amaze many of us. This week, the press is reporting that Islamic State fighters are deeply worried. No, not about U.S. air strikes or the training of their opponents. According to reports, IS fighters are terrified that they are facing female Peshmerga fighter (“Peshmergettes”) and, here is the poetic justice, if they are killed by one of them, they will not get the 72 virgins that they were promised in paradise.

Peshmergettes, it appears, is far more disturbing than all of those heads of non-believers that the fighters like to pass around.

Ed Royce, who chairs the U.S. House International Relations Committee, is quoted as saying that “These [ISIS] soldiers apparently believed that if they were killed in battle, they went to paradise as long as they were killed by a man.” Leave it to women to ruin everything by entering the workforce for IS terrorists.

Of course, if you believe that you are guaranteed 72 virgins in paradise, this may not be quite as far fetched as it may seem to the rest of humanity.

In other news, the spokesman for IS has denounced John Kerry “the old uncircumcised geezer.” Only a group of murderous, sex-obsessed maniacs would incorporate the fact of circumcision as the most relevant characterization of one of their foes.

What is truly impressive that none of this seems at all crazy to these guys: the beheadings, the virgins, the need to be killed by a man. It is all treated as perfectly understandable in the parallel universe of the Islamic State.

Source: Al Ararabiya and Telegraph

35 thoughts on “Peshmergettes and Paradise: Islamic State Fighters Terrified Of Being Martyred By Women”

  1. “I guess no one bothered to ask “where we gonna find 72 virgins?”

    Math don’t make sense boys.”

    If you believe your going to be alive after your dead and sent to a magical kingdom, who the hell cares about math.

    I just wonder how happy their going to be on the 73rd day.

  2. We very we’ll might already have women piloting drones and pushing buttons firing missiles to kill these terrorists. Perhaps we should make that a policy and advertise the fact.

  3. Isaac, PJ O’Rourke says fighting Islamic terrorists is like fighting, “self destructive, insane, violent, homeless people.”

  4. If it didn’t unnecessarily put the pilot’s life in danger it would be awesome to have flights of women fighter pilots strafe, bomb, and then drop leaflets identifying themselves.

    In war the first move is to dehumanize the other side. The Japanese became Japs, Slopes, etc and stories of how they were less than human were made up to make it easier for the ‘good guys’ to wax them. The Germans became Krauts and buffoons. However, in this case you don’t have to make anything up. The thugs of ISIS do it for us, on Youtube, in declarations, constantly expressing stuff that any normal person would find incredibly stupid, not to mention inhumane.

  5. John Kerry is uncircumcised. Sounds like that guy who said it is gay. Stone him to death.

  6. This sure smells like CIA propaganda. There are increasing appeals to feminist ideals to justify imperialist war.

  7. Let us drop massive quantities of old Playboy and Penthouse magazines on Islamic countries….. Their eyes will bug out, and their heads will explode…..

  8. I have long advocated battalions of women warriors (can we recall the vaunted Amazons) who would only be allowed into battle when they were PMSing. It would be a force multiplier. Since women sync on the alpha female we would have to have them live in barracks to make sure they stayed attuned to each other. Given 6 or 7 of these units, synced to different cycles we could hit the enemy with terrifying force with regularity.

    They would be known far and wide as the “Red Berets” Feared by all.

  9. @indio007,

    And the “propaganda” in this instance is?

    BTW, since you appear to be wired into the network, is there any truth to the assertion that jihadists may engage in gay sexual acts to deceive the infidels?

    I mean, because we already know they “know” their livestock in the biblical sense.

    Wait, wait – don’t tell me, your going to fatwa my ass.

  10. Wow! If just the thought of being iced by a woman chills that human mange, maybe having gays serve openly is the ultimate weapon against the Islamic Radicals. Being iced by a lesbian – is that a double bad for those parasites?

    1. What these would be martyrs should find chilling – if they get their wish – is the thought of coming home day-after-day to not one but 72 pissed off spouses to whom he must serially explain why he hasn’t found aa job yet. Not THAT would be a fitting hell.

  11. If I were Obama I would replace as many attack aircraft pilots as I could with females and would broadcast that fact over radio targeted at ISIS fighters.

  12. This is the way group psychosis works. It is all very cultish thinking, which will never make sense in the normal world. People who become members of cults are generally unstable to begin with and when you pair that with Isis groupthink you have this insanity running rampant. It is the same thing that happened in Nazi Germany. Logic will never be manifested by suck ilk.

  13. Never underestimate the awesome fierceness of a woman fighter. They have the power of robbing these bad boys of their hereafter with their virgins. That’s enough to leave such tough guys grasping their loins in fear and loathing.

  14. Won’t they be shocked when those 72 virgins turn out to be guys with beards living in their mom’s basement.

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