It is a dream of many a Democratic strategist: A Hannity-Palin Ticket or Palin-Hannity Ticket in 2012. According to one news report, Sean Hannity added fuel to the speculation this week by saying that he would not rule out a run and would await direction from the Almighty. (It is assumed that that is a reference to God as opposed to Roger Ailes).
When asked by radio sidekick Bill Cunningham, Hannity left open the possibility of a run, saying “I’ve never made a decision in my life without – whatever destiny God has you’ve got to fulfill it.” Not a single decision in his life. That must make lunch menu decisions rather difficult.
When the audience erupted in feverish excitement at the prospect after his statement, Hannity asked: “Would any of you really want me to run?”
Faced with shrinking popularity polls, many at the DNC were saying “oh yes, please.” For hard-right Republicans, a Palin-Hannity ticket might be the best of all worlds since Palin would resign halfway through her term and conservatives could enjoy both a President Palin and a President Hannity — if their hearts could take it.
The Palin-Hannity cabinet has some obvious choices:
Secretary of Defense: God
Treasury: God
Transportation: God
Interior: God
Commerce: God
Justice: God
HUD: God
Labor: God
Of course, if the Almighty is too busy with the other decision’s in Sean’s life, there is John Yoo for Justice, Oliver North for Defense, Gov. Sanford for Transportation, Sen. David Vitter for Labor, Bernie Ebbers for Commerce, Jeff Skilling for Treasury (Ken Lay is no longer available), Joseph Hazelwood for Interior — and of course Glen Beck for White House Spokesman. The only danger would be that the hearts of some Republicans would literally burst out of their chests in spontaneous explosions of joy.
Possible slogans based on past campaigns:
“Palin-Hannity: In Your Heart, You Know They’re [Far] Right.”
“Palin-Hannity: Its the Antebellum in America again.”
“Palin-Hannity: God-Chosen, Fox-Certified”
“Palin-Hannity: Because One Can Never Be Too Right.”
“Palin-Hannity: No You Can’t”
“Palin-Hannity: An Endangered Bird in Every Pot, a Humvee in every garage”
“Palin-Hannity: Stop Thinking About Tomorrow and Start Thinking About Yesterday.”
“Palin-Hannity: Building a Bridge to the Eighteenth Century.”
For the report, click here.
GWLSM,
I thought that Beck was just suspended from his radio show, not the TV show – what a bummer, the perfect pick for the Apocalypse cabinet position and he can’t get confirmed just because he called the president a racist… I never thought of the rapture that way – as a fellow atheist I’ll start praying, too. Bring it on!
This is the lord..IF Palin/Hannity run and win anything in 2012 – I’ve leaving.
slart writes: Palin, Hannity and all of the ‘real americans’ that vote for them will be going up to heaven with Jesus in the Rapture – they don’t need to care about those of us left behind.
this is almost enough to get an atheist like me to start praying for the end times. just imagine the world without the christian lunatics. I can.
it’ll be spectacular.
slart
Glen is on “hiatus” now. indefinitely.
this makes him court jester. btw. conservative friends of mine are saying that his loss of sponsors for his sitcom is a liberal plot.
this makes him court jester.
FFLEO,
Palin, Hannity and all of the ‘real americans’ that vote for them will be going up to heaven with Jesus in the Rapture – they don’t need to care about those of us left behind.
True FFLEO,
But what about COG. With both of them gone who will be driving the ship of state?
We are just gonna need a Secretary of Rapture for the Pal/Han Admin. because The Rapture will bring more chaos than the Dept. of Homeland Security, FEMA, TSA et al. combined.
pardon me?,
I would think that Glen Beck would make an outstanding Secretary of (the) Apocalypse.
Why shouldn’t we have a Secretary of Apocalypse and Secretary of Protection from Witchcraft?
A Hannity-Palin ticket would guarantee a long Democratic hold on Congress and the White House. I look forward to an election campaign that would provide so much hilarity.
A little late to the dance,but who will be what in this administration?
Hello Professor Turley,
I nearly fell off my chair in laughter and did a write-up on it in my site. Frankly it is bizzare..but the Republicans never seize to amaze me!!!
🙂
A Zirkle-Palin ticket would keep Saturday Night Live ranked #1 for a long time. lol
One more thing.
Happy exploding.
If you say one more thing Buddha my heads gonna explode.
FFLEO,
The sad thing is that Crist is probably the best Republican in the State so far and his opponent for the Senate, Rubio, is a clown in it for the money. Being that it’s Florida, who do you think is going to win?
You Democrats best get your next presidential candidate ready because my Republican Party is going to *Rapture* in the next election.
_________________________________
{Quote:
Are You There, God? It’s Me, Charlie
Town Hall reports that Crist was speaking to a group of real estate agents, and credited prayer notes in the Western Wall in Jerusalem with preventing his state from being hit by hurricanes during his time as governor.
Crist told of how he visited the Wall in 2007, and placed a note saying: “Dear God, please protect our Florida from storms and other difficulties. Charlie.”
“Time goes on — May, June, July, August, September, October, November, December — no hurricanes,” Crist said. “Thank God.”
Crist has also had other people place notes in the Wall in 2008 and 2009.
Crist made it clear that’s he’s not personally taking credit for Florida having been spared from hurricanes. “I give that to God,” Crist said. “But it’s nice.”
http://tpmdc.talkingpointsmemo.com/2009/08/are-you-there-god-its-me-charlie.php
End Quote}
________________________________
A few more of the many verses:
I don’t care if it rains or freezes
Long as I got my plastic Jesus
Riding on the dashboard of my car
He’s the dude with the rusty nails,
Walks on water, don’t need no sails
Riding on the dashboard of me car
I don’t care if the night is scary
As long as I got the Virgin Mary
Sittin’ on the dashboard of my car.
She don’t slip and she don’t slide
Cuz her butt is magnetized
Sittin’ on the dashboard of my car.
I don’t care if I’m broke or starvin’
As long as I’ve got a fish named Darwin
Glued to the trunklid of my car
God, I’m feeling so evolved
Drivin’ with my problems solved
Proclaiming what I think of what we are
They is goin’ to need a campaign song and ‘Plastic Jesus’ is juss’ right for the Pal-in-Hannity tour bus. We have heard Palin say everthang but sang…
Tia Blake uses the melody I have used for years for this neat song and there are many variations on the melody and lyrics. There are not any good YouTube versions of the song (Cool Hand Luke is good for the sad version). However, Palin/Hannity will need the rip-roarin’ Hallelujahs screamin’ version with speakin’ n’ tongues and swangin’ them rattlesnakes ‘bout all them rightwingnut votin’ holy rollers.
A brief audio file to start you with the ‘melody’
http://www.whitetreeaz.com/plastic_jesus/pljesus.wav
Plastic Jesus
– Ernie Marrs; Trad and Anon…” initial parody was apparently put together by Ed Rush and George Cromarty”
Well, I don’t care if it rains or freezes,
Long as I have my plastic Jesus
Riding on the dashboard of my car
Through all trials and tribulations,
We will travel every nation,
With my plastic Jesus I’ll go far.
CHORUS
Plastic Jesus, plastic Jesus
Riding on the dashboard of my car
Through my trials and tribulations,
And my travels thru the nations,
With my plastic Jesus I’ll go far.
I don’t care if it rains or freezes
As long as I’ve got my Plastic Jesus
Glued to the dashboard of my car,
You can buy Him phosphorescent
Glows in the dark, He’s Pink and Pleasant,
Take Him with you when you’re travelling far
I don’t care if it’s dark or scary
Long as I have magnetic Mary
Ridin’ on the dashboard of my car
I feel I’m protected amply
I’ve got the whole damn Holy Family
Riding on the dashboard of my car
You can buy a Sweet Madonna
Dressed in rhinestones sitting on a
Pedestal of abalone shell
Goin’ ninety, I’m not wary
‘Cause I’ve got my Virgin Mary
Guaranteeing I won’t go to Hell
Here in Texas, i’m afraid she’s gonna fit Right in when she comes to campaign for Perry Goodhair.
Get a load of this:
http://www.mysanantonio.com/news/Conservative_history_idea_for_state_ed_slammed.html