In Jackson, Tennessee, a man took his bulldog to a kill shelter after catching the dog humped another male dog. The man concluded that the dog was gay and took him to a shelter that euthanizes unwanted dogs. Fortunately, a sane person read about the dog and adopted him from the Madison County animal shelter.
There is now an avalanche of calls for the “gay dog” and the shelter is trying to get people interested in the ten other dogs on the execution block. They just need another homophobe to call for the death penalty on the Cocker Spaniel found with Streisand albums in his cage.
30 thoughts on “Gaydar for the Gaydog: Tennessee Man Takes Pet To Kill Shelter After Concluding He Is A Homosexual Bulldog”
Eulogy To The Dog:
By George Vest, 1869
“The best friend man has in the world may turn against him and become his worst enemy. His son, or his daughter, that he has reared with loving care may prove ungrateful. Those who are nearest and dearest to us, those whom we trust with our happiness and good name may become traitors to their faith. The money a man has he may lose. It flies away from him, perhaps when he needs it most. A man’s reputation may be sacrificed in a moment of ill-considered action. The people who are prone to fall on their knees when success is with us may be the first to throw the stone of malice when failure settles its cloud upon our head.
The one absolutely unselfish friend that man can have in this selfish world, the one that never deserts him, the one that never proves ungrateful or treacherous, is his dog. A man’s dog stands by him in prosperity and poverty, in health and in sickness. He will sleep on the cold ground when the wintry winds blow and the snow drives fiercely, if only to be near his master’s side. He will kiss the hand that has no food to offer, he will lick the wounds and sores that come in encounters with the roughness of the world. He guards the sleep of his pauper master as if he were a prince.
When all other friends desert, he remains. When riches take wing, and reputation falls to pieces, he is as constant in his love as the sun in its journey through the heavens.
If fortune dries his master forth, an outcast in the world, friendless and homeless, the faithful dog asks no higher privilege that that of accompanying him against danger, to fight against his enemies. And when that last scene comes, and death takes his master in its embrace and his body is laid away in the cold ground, no matter if all other friends pursue their way, there, by the graveside will the noble dog be found, his head between his paws, his eyes sad, but open in alert watchfulness, faithful, and true, even in death.”
Senator Vest, speaking to a jury about Old Drum, shot in 1869.
This place is cookin’ over. Go gettem boy and dogs.
Now if we could generate a little electricity…….!
When I was young, we used to have a dog who humped the leg on our kitchen table…… Perhaps we should have put him in a wood chipper? Hunh? Isn’t Tennessee the state where they used to arrest people for teaching Evolution? Guess this guy is a just a few steps closer to the great Apes in his development…. than the rest of America.
One would think the dog’s former owner would have appreciated its suspected sexual orientation, at least there wouldn’t be all this fighting, marauding, or impregnating as is the case with randy, straight dogs.
A bordello for dogs in Amsterdam, that’s classic.
While the topic is ripe. If you are a human and dont have a dog. Think about it. You dont have to be blind or half blind to need guidance. On the 8th Day God Created Dog. We can guide you through the moral issues. A little hump on the leg gets your goat. You take doggie for a walk. You smell the roses. You go back to the fridge and choose food wisely. The day is launched. Without a dog, you get up at noon and turn on Fox News. Get a life, get a dog. Praise the Lard on Sunday, Krisco on Monday and dog the rest of the week.
Dogs have civil rights. Well, human liberties, applicable to canines. We go by life, liberty and pursuit of dog biscuit. When some schmuck like this guy tries to get the dog killed at the dog killing center then the word gets out and by tomorrow there will be a lot of dog turds in his yard. If he lives in a high rise it might be by his car door. I would term this human a dickhead but I do not think it will pass the censors to get on this blog.
Humping is something we do to humans to get their attention. Its not the real thing. Its a Beyonce kind of thing.
HumpinDog dont hump me.
There are not any gay dogs in this dogpac and most male dogs go by the admonition of “pork em if ya gottem”. We use the word “pork” slide by the WordPress censor and the Dogalogue Machine. So, we laugh when we bark “pork”.
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