Martian Slave Babies! Alex Jones Airs Theory On Kidnapped Children Raised On Mars

flight-to-mars-movie-poster-1951-1010458980Alex Jones has been repeatedly accused of running false stories on his InfoWars program.  However, this week one guest caused jaws to drop and prompted a NASA spokesman to deny that it has kidnapped children and worked them as slaves on a Mars colony.  Of course, that is exactly what National Aeronautics and Slaves Administration (NASA) would say if it was kidnapping children and working them slaves on a Mars colony.

The Mars Slave Baby story was broken by Robert David Steele who declared:  “We actually believe that there is a colony on Mars that is populated by children who were kidnapped and sent into space on a 20-year ride.  So that once they get to Mars they have no alternative but to be slaves on the Mars colony.”  Adding to the chilling aspects of this colony is that these children could travel for 20 years to Mars and still be children.

Spokesperson Guy Webster responded with the following denial:  “There are no humans on Mars. There are active rovers on Mars. There was a rumor going around last week that there weren’t. There are.  But there are no humans.”

Well, sure, but what if the child slaves are no longer considered human?  After all, according to the account by Steele, this colony is composed of children who traveled for 20 years to Mars and yet remain children.  No human child could achieve such a thing.

Jones noted that anything is possible but “Look, I know that 90 percent of the NASA missions are secret and I’ve been told by high level NASA engineers that you have no idea. There is so much stuff going on.”But it gets worse, Steele explained that the kidnapped children are also being killed to harvest their blood and bone marrow.  He noted that “Pedophilia does not stop with sodomizing children. It goes straight into terrorizing them to adrenalize their blood and then murdering them. It also includes murdering them so that they can have their bone marrow harvested as well as body parts.”So there you have it.

 

By the way, President Trump appears to be entirely correct in his 2015  statement to Jones that “your reputation is amazing.” Yes, as amazing as Martian slave baby colonies.

 

70 thoughts on “Martian Slave Babies! Alex Jones Airs Theory On Kidnapped Children Raised On Mars”

  1. The day the Earth went still was the day that Trump got elected. The last day it stood still was on 9/11. The time before that was when Hitler got elected. The time before that was the day of The Reichstag Fire Decree!
    The 1933 Parallels.

    Tell you’re momma. Tell your pa. The kids have all gone to Arkansas. Not Mars.

  2. (music)

    How was I to know?
    He was with the Martians too.
    dah dah dah , da da da , dah dah.
    He was riding in Las Vegas..
    On a vegan train.
    The Martians were driving..
    His brain was quite lame.

    Oh, his name is TurleyDog..
    He’s a desperate Man!
    His wife is eating pudding..
    Back in Japan!

    1. And the wives are always bitching..
      When you’re up on Mars.
      And really you are shitting them cause..
      You are in the bars.
      da da da, dah da da datta.

  3. A good laugh is a great way to start the morning.

    It’s less damaging then what CNN has been doing, but it’s just as discrediting.

    Did they ever find that Malaysian plane or was Don Lemon correct about it being sucked up into a black hole?

  4. Those that listen to and believe Jones, are the same ones who listen to and believe Trump.

  5. Maxine Waters says that 700 Billion people will lose their insurance under the GOP plan. Now, which of these two stories sounds more factual?

    1. Maybe if those 700 billion people moved to Guam, it might tip over and capsize. Hank Johnson seems to believe such things are possible.

      1. Darren – wouldn’t those 700 billion people have a tough time fitting on Guam? My understanding is that it is not THAT big. 🙂

      2. Mad Maxine is now calling for Trump to not only be impeached, but to be “exiled”…..wonder where she has in mind?

        1. Somewhere with large golden palaces where crooked oligarchs feel very comfortable.;)

    2. Looks like Trumpcare failed while he was tweeting about Joe and Mika so Maxine will have to revise her numbers if and when they put together a new plan.

  6. 20 years and still a child?

    Sure beats Oil of Olay.

    If this president is half the business man he claims, he will bottle it and sell it.

    Well … any thing is possible.

  7. Maybe NASA’s administrators can be charged under the Mann Act. I suspect U.S. jurisdiction would apply on the flight over since the craft is a U.S. flagged. Mars itself? That is for someone above my pay grade.

  8. Isn’t the account of children remaining chikdren for many years borne out by the “Alien” documentaries and others that featured suspended animation?

  9. Gar baj is out in the yard.
    Three spots on the wall by Who Flung Foo.
    Georgetown is from Mars.
    Mars makes candy bars.
    Bars which serve candy sell pot and do dandy.
    Those who buy sex products are dumb. Sex is free to all but men who are married. They pay dearly.
    Dearly beloved is a a Scotish Rite.
    Get hitched and then you are fixed.
    Kids who are born on ice, skate on rice.

  10. The crazy thing about crazy is that you can’t prove it’s untrue. Oh, you can theorize and ridicule but unless you comb every inch of the surface of Mars you can’t disprove it. About all you can say is that the evidence for its existence is lacking. Welcome to the world of Russell’s Teapot. So don’t be so smug. As the song goes “Impossible? Things are happening every day!”

    1. “Oh, you can theorize and ridicule but unless you comb every inch of the surface of Mars you can’t disprove it. ”

      And that does not even touch on the salt mines or the below ground living quarters for the labor slaves. You could hide most of Manhattan down there.

  11. What does this garbage possibly have to do with the law?

    Tighten up, Turley.

    1. “What does this garbage possibly have to do with the law?”
      Well, it’s probably illegal to ship kidnapped children to Mars. Probably.

      1. Jay S – I think it is a ‘gray’ area of the law. Certainly the SC has no settled law on it.

      2. “Well, it’s probably illegal to ship kidnapped children to Mars. Probably.”

        Does transportation to Mars cross a state line?

        And if they don’t arrive for 20 years, is there even a purpose in the present?

        If we have to wait 20 years for evidence of their evil purpose, will the statute of limitations have already run?

        1. bfm – would it still be illegal if you sent illegal aliens to Mars? Just a thought.

          1. ” would it still be illegal if you sent illegal aliens to Mars? Just a thought.”

            Well … does Mars have a travel ban?

  12. Hmmm. I was considering questions like these, about Martian kids, four years ago, on my old The Birther Think Tank Blog. . .

    https://birtherthinktank.files.wordpress.com/2013/08/captain-kangaroo-cast-jpg_172503.jpg

    The Caption Read, “The Crew Of The Ten Year Long Mars Explorer Mission Weren’t Sure How Their Kids Would Be Received Back On Earth” and there was a mouse over Easter Egg that read “Green Genes.”

    If anybody is interested in the story, it is here. But it is also no longer relevant to anything.

    https://birtherthinktank.wordpress.com/2013/08/19/kangaroos-on-mars-are-they-naturally-born/

    One of these days I got to print that blog off in book form.

    Squeeky Fromm
    Girl Reporter

  13. Heard the name before, but knew nothing about him.

    I do not think that I need to learn anything more about Mr. Jones.

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