Category: Lawyering

Bizarre, Courts, Criminal law, International, Justice, Lawyering, Science, Testimony

A Good Offense is The “Breast” Defense
Defense Exhibit A -Serena Kozakura

We’ve seen on this blog how lack of girth can be a “Get-Out-Of-Jail-Free” card for some folks. Can the “Bust Defense” to crimes be far behind? Well, it’s here now—just a tad east. Tokyo pinup model, Serena Kozakura, won her 2008 criminal case using her 44’s. No violence involved, just a little physics to prove that she was unable to fit through a hole. Seems our buxom lassie was charged with breaking into the home of an ex-boyfriend to confront the man about seeing another woman. When the hole in the man’s “kicked-in” door was measured it was determined that  Kozakura’s 44 inch bust would not fit the space. The trial court convicted her anyway rejecting the OJ “if it doesn’t fit ….” defense, but an appeals court reversed.

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Criminal law, International, Justice, Lawyering, Politics, Society

Wikileaks: Obama Administration Secretly Worked To Prevent Prosecution of War Crimes By The Bush Administration

One of the little reported details from the latest batch of Wikileaks material are cables showing that the Obama Administration worked hard behind the scenes not only to prevent any investigation of torture in the United States but shutdown efforts abroad to enforce the Geneva Conventions and the Convention Against Torture. This includes threatening the Spanish that, if they did not derail a judicial investigation, it would have serious consequences in bilateral relations. I discussed these cables on Countdown.
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Bizarre, Courts, Lawyering, Media, Society

U.S. Copyright Group Sues Attorney Who Published Self-Help Guide For Laypersons Defending Themselves in Copyright Cases

The U.S. Copyright Group has long been criticized for its tactics in pursuing people for copyright infringement of movies or music. Critics charge that USCG coerces people to settle for thousands of dollars to avoid high litigation costs and penalties. USCG sues thousands of people in a given year to force such settlements in what is legitimately described as a factory operation by Dunlap, Grubb and Weaver. One attorney, Graham Syfert, says he tried to even the playing field by publishing a “self-help” guide on how laypersons can fight USCG. The attorneys at USCG reportedly responded by suing Syfert.

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Academia, Animals, Bizarre, Columns, Congress, Constitutional Law, Courts, Criminal law, Environment, International, Justice, Lawyering, Media, Military, Politics, Religion, Science, Society, Supreme Court, Testimony, Things That Tick Me Off, Torts, Uncategorized

Top 100: ABA Top Blog Competition Begins

It is that time of the year for our annual blawgletting — the ABA top blog competition. We have once again been selected as one of the top 100 legal blogs (of over 3000) and nominated for the IMHO (opinion) category and it is time to release our minions upon the field of blog battle. Vote here to defend our way of life and the future of the planet.

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Bizarre, Courts, Justice, Lawyering, Supreme Court

Take My Scalia, Please!

Just ran across this gem. Who is the funniest Supreme Court Justice? A 2005 study reported in the New York Times has the answer. Boston University Professor J.D. Wexler has conducted a survey of the transcripts of  SCOTUS oral arguments, and … drum roll, please … Justice Antonin Scalia is the semi-official “Court Jester,” with 77 laughs. Justice Stephen Breyer came in second with 45, and Justice Ginsburg quipped in just four laughs. Bringing up the rear was the “Harpo Marx” of the troupe, Justice  Clarence Thomas, who added zero Continue reading “Take My Scalia, Please!” →

Bizarre, Courts, Justice, Lawyering, Things That Tick Me Off, Torts

Poor Bathroom Etiquette: Pregnant Woman PO’ed Over Denial of Bathroom Privileges

Long Island resident, Lindsay Ekizian, has filed an interesting case in Manhattan (NY) Supreme Court alleging that the Hammerstein Ballroom callously failed to allow her use of its restroom. The 35 weeks along mother-to-be asked politely if she could use the bathroom as she was filing out of the establishment after seeing a comedy act. Rebuffed at first, she explained to the manager that she was pregnant (wonder why that needed to be explained) and was in desperate need. “There’s a bathroom at the end of the block,” came the compassionate reply according to the plaintiff. Unable to make it to the nearby diner, Ms. Ekizian suffered an indignity best left to the imagination.  Not sure of the theory of liability (intentional infliction emotional distress?), but if there ever was a case with jury appeal here it is.

Source: New York Post

–Mark Esposito, Guest Blogger

Bizarre, Lawyering, Society, Torts

Hold the Fries: Did Burger Joint Get Raw Deal on Moby Dick Nuisance?

Steptoe & Johnson has prevailed against a burger restaurant, Rogue States, after the law firm complained that the fumes from the restaurant made them all smell like short-order cooks. Indeed, one of the firm’s “rainmakers” even reportedly threatened to resign from the firm if the burger smells were not removed from his office. D.C. Superior Court judge John Mott ruled that Rogue States was indeed responsible for a nuisance and must either abate the odors or close down.

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Criminal law, Justice, Lawyering, Things That Tick Me Off, Uncategorized

Say It Is So, Joe!

Arizona Sheriff Joe Arpaio has been the right-wing poster boy for tough law enforcement. Subjecting his prisoners to spoiled food, tent villages in scorching heat, pink underwear, and then launching criminal investigations against public officials who challenged him just added to his “Walking Tall,” tough-cop credentials among his backers. He also is the moving force behind Arizona’s tough anti-immigration law backing Governor Jan Brewer in her “Show Me Ze Papers” campaign against Mexican immigrants.  Now it seems the worm has turned, and Maricopa County officials are wondering why Arpaio needs to keep two sets of books.

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Courts, Justice, Lawyering, Science, Society, Torts

Seventh Circuit Allows “Death By Taser” Suit to Proceed

Reversing a lower court grant of summary judgment, the U.S. Seventh Circuit Court of Appeals has allowed a Wisconsin couple’s “Death by Taser” suit to proceed to trial against the police and Town and Village of Mukwonago, Wisconsin. Their son, 29-year-old, Nickolos Cyrus, suffered from a bipolar disorder and schizophrenia, and was well-known to the police for prior delusional — but non-criminal — episodes. When the young man was reported missing, police located him on a construction site. His parents allege that Nickolos was passive, unarmed, and had no history of violence such that multiple taser shocks would be needed to subdue him. The police respond that multiple taserings were a reasonable use of force under the circumstances and that his death was unforeseen.

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Bizarre, Congress, Constitutional Law, Criminal law, Justice, Lawyering, Military, Politics, Society

Obama Fights To Preserve Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell Before Supreme Court

President Barack Obama continued his effort to preserve the “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy in a filing before the United States Supreme Court. A trial court had imposed an injunction to halt the discriminatory policy. The Administration could have allowed the injunction to stand pending an appeal but succeeded in getting the order reversed. Now, it is defending its intention to continue to discriminate against gays and lesbians in an appeal to the Supreme Court.

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Academia, Congress, Constitutional Law, Courts, Lawyering, Politics, Society

The Porteous Impeachment: Post-Trial Brief

We have filed our post-trial brief in the Senate Impeachment Trial of United States District Court Judge Thomas Porteous. The brief, linked below, presents the factual record on each of the articles of impeachment after the conclusion of the Senate trial. We are expecting final arguments to be heard in December before all 100 Senators on the Senate floor.

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Constitutional Law, Courts, Criminal law, International, Justice, Lawyering, Politics, Religion, Society

The Canadian Polygamy Case

The British Columbia Supreme Court will be some hearing testimony on the criminalization of plural unions — an extremely important case with global ramifications. As has been my practice in past cases, I wanted to confirm my involvement in the case as a court-appointed expert on the legality of such criminal laws. Weeks ago, I was retained to submit written testimony on the right of consenting adults to plural unions under United States and international law.

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Courts, Justice, Lawyering, Torts

I Thought That I Should Never See An Opinion As Lovely As a Tree–Wrong!!

Who says appellate judges can’t be literate — and hilarious.

Fisher v. Lowe
122 Mich.App. 418, 33 N.W.2d 67 (1983)

Syllabus

Courts, Criminal law, Justice, Lawyering, Uncategorized

Does Convicted Cop Equal Reasonable Doubt?

Norfolk, Virginia, Police Detective Robert Glenn Ford had a reputation as a hard-nosed cop who handled most of the City’s high profile criminal cases. Now he’s got another one but it’s his name “across the v” from the Government. Ford was convicted in federal court in Norfolk of extortion and lying to federal investigators. Specifically, the Government alleged that Ford took money from criminal defendants in exchange for helping them get lighter sentences. Ford maintains his innocence and vows to appeal.

Ford handled 200 homicide cases including the infamous “Norfolk 4” case which resulted in four convictions for the rape and murder of  an 18-year-old wife of a Norfolk sailor. Ford was accused by lawyers for the “Norfolk 4” of planting jailhouse snitches near in the men’s cell blocks to solicit confessions.

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Bizarre, Criminal law, Lawyering

Former Bar Treasurer and Prominent Lawyer Aaron Biber Sentenced to 18 Years For Sexual Assault of Teenage Boy

Prominent Twin Cities lawyer and former State Bar Treasurer Aaron Biber was sentenced this week to 18 years in prison for sexually assaulting a teenage boy. The court reached the sentence by taking an upward departure to increase the jail time. Minnesota law required only 12 years.
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