Bacon Lung? U.S. and Israel Object to the Use of “Swine” Flu As Name of Current Outbreak

180px-pig_usda01c0116The Obama Administration is finally getting ahead of this health care crisis: Homeland Security Secretary Janet Napolitano and Agriculture Secretary Tom Vilsack have told reporters to stop calling this virus the “Swine” Flu — suggesting the ever-so-hip “H1N1′ virus. While it was the pork businesses that led to the change in nomenclature, Israel is moving to drop the reference due to religious objections to pork. It appears that even catching a swine-based flu is religiously problematic. The Obama Administration appears to have rejected “the virus formerly known as Swine Flu.”

“H1N1 virus” is a bit of a mouthful. Saying “I am down with “H1N1” sounds like you are good at the latest Wii game or you are entertaining a Star Wars droid. Besides, if we are going to substitute negative uses of pork we would be left with calling weight gain “H1N1y” instead of porky. Wasting effort on the unappreciative or unsophisticated would become “throwing pearls before H1N1. Indeed, consider what happens to such famous (albeit negative uses) in movies. Bette Davis in Of Human Bondage would be left with “You dirty H1N1! I never cared for you, not one bit. I was always making a fool of ya.”

Yet, using my favorite alternative, “Bacon Lung,” would probably not go over well with the pig people.

Israel’s move against the term misses the marketing opportunity revealed this week with an Imam citing the Swine Flu to show the superiority of the Muslim faith.

I doubt that this is going to be terribly successful. The Obama Administration may have to simply require the use of the word “swine” in a positive way. The President could refer to a friendly prime minister “as solid as a swine” or refer to the dollar “as solid as a swine.” Better yet, the Pork Industry could running commercials that say things like “There No Such Thing as Mad Swine Disease” or “Swines Do Not Pass Flu, People Pass Flu” or “Porky the Pig Was a Swine.” It could also quote Ryanair president Michael O’Leary that only slumdwellers get swine flu. Problem solved.

For the story, click here.

11 thoughts on “Bacon Lung? U.S. and Israel Object to the Use of “Swine” Flu As Name of Current Outbreak”

  1. Well FF LEO,

    I bet he did in fact get to First Base. I’ll take 2 to 1 odds that after, he went to Denny’s for that Grand Slam.

  2. Buddha said:

    “Now who’s on third base again?”

    Well, I trust that you made it past 1st base during your vacation…

  3. Buddha,

    Oh Yoda is back,

    Oh Zen master did you learn your lesson.

    Excuse my typos. They have been point out to me.

  4. I don’t know. Bacon Lung sounds like something a Son of the South may try to contract on purpose. Now who’s on third base again?

  5. News Heading on Yahoo states:

    “WHO says swine flu moving closer to pandemic”

    (*WHO* = World Health Organization)

    That reminded me of this Abbott/Costello gem (partial see link for words and YouTube for a good laugh)

    Classic VIDEO @ :

    Abbott:. Well, let’s see, we have on the bags, Who’s on first, What’s on second, I Don’t Know is on third…

    Costello: And you don’t know the fellows’ names?
    Abbott: Well I should.
    Costello: Well then who’s on first?
    Abbott: Yes.
    Costello: I mean the fellow’s name.
    Abbott: Who.
    Costello: The guy on first.
    Abbott: Who.
    Costello: The first baseman.
    Abbott: Who.
    Costello: The guy playing…
    Abbott: Who is on first!
    Costello: I’m asking YOU who’s on first.
    Abbott: That’s the man’s name.
    Costello: That’s who’s name?
    Abbott: Yes.
    Costello: Well go ahead and tell me.
    Abbott: That’s it.
    Costello: That’s who?
    Abbott: Yes.
    etc. @

  6. If they called it the “tomato flu virus” ignorant people would quit tomatoes. Let’s call it the “Bush/Cheney torture virus” (Swine = bush/cheney anyways) and then let the torture trials commence!

    More imbecilic govmit’ Gobbledygook. Just call it “the current flu variant” and not harm or disparage any person, place, or thing, except for the virus itself.

    Good witticisms today, as usual, ‘fesser Turley…

  7. Please a little sympathy here, it’s so hard to be a pork producer what with those Muslims, Jews, Hindu’s and Buddhists spreading their evil propaganda. Now with this flu it will hurt profits as in ” Waitress please let me have those eggs over easy, home fries, white toast and turkey bacon.”

  8. The name that something is called by always important.

    Rep. Bachmann knows that. She just went on the floor of Congress and accused Roosevelt of prolonging the Depression by the “Hoot-Smalley” tariff.

    Roosevelt was sworn in in 1933. The Smoot-Hawley Tariff was passed by Republican majorities in both Houses of Congress and signed into law by Republican President Hoover.

    On June 17, 1930.

    What is that acronym? Yeah. ROLF,LMAO!

Comments are closed.