While we have been criticizing public officials for their criminalization of baggy pants, it appears that we can now add the objection that they are assisting crime by requiring tailored outfits. Columbus police have a video showing a man who failed in a bank robbery effort when he tripped over his baggy pants.
Continue reading “Holy, Inseam, Batman! Bank Robber Foiled By Baggy Pants”
Category: Society
As promised, here are a few pictures and recommendations from France. One item will await a posting in our series “Things That Tick Me Off.” While October and November are part of the low tourism period, I do not know why. Paris and the French countryside are ablaze in color and the weather is mild. No lines at museums or restaurants. Forget Spring in Paris, think Fall.
Continue reading “An American in Paris”
The British Columbia Supreme Court will be some hearing testimony on the criminalization of plural unions — an extremely important case with global ramifications. As has been my practice in past cases, I wanted to confirm my involvement in the case as a court-appointed expert on the legality of such criminal laws. Weeks ago, I was retained to submit written testimony on the right of consenting adults to plural unions under United States and international law.
While heavier and a bit jet lagged, I have returned from the France. I must report that we came and we were captured. The conference in Paris was fascinating. I had some very interesting discussions on the cultural defense with American and foreign lawyers – including some pending cases in France on the issue. Of course, as in real estate, it was “location, location, location.” Paris was gorgeous with leaves in full autumnal splender. It was impossible to get a bad meal or a bad glass of wine. Trust me, we did an exhaustive survey. I just landed this morning and I will be sharing a few pictures later, but I wanted to check in today.
Continue reading “I Have Returned: Merci Beaucoup To Elaine, David, and Mark”
Brazil’s got nothing on San Francisco. Come December 1st, the City by the Bay will be without those nasty Hamburglars and the Avatar avatars. A new city ordinance requires that restaurants meet certain nutritional standards before including toys in the packaging. Ronald is not amused. “We are extremely disappointed with today’s decision. It’s not what our customers want, nor is it something they asked for,” lamented McDonald’s spokeswoman Danya Proud. The ordinance requires that toy-filled treats have “less than 600 calories, contain fruits and vegetables, and include beverages without excessive fat or sugar.” Not exactly something Grandma would frown on, by the way.
The ordinance was prompted because “fifteen percent of American children are overweight or obese — which puts them at risk of developing heart disease, diabetes and cancer, according to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.”
Source: Yahoo News
–Mark Esposito, Guest Blogger
Anna Del Rio has lost a daughter to crime and is now being harassed by a street gang because of her job as a dispatcher for Crime Stoppers. Think the L.A. resident is intimidated? Not Hardly. Del Rio, whose 20-year-old daughter was murdered a decade ago, awoke to find her garage door spray-painted with profanity and the numbers “187.” “187” is the police code for homicide. The gang has apparently confused working for Crime Stoppers as being the same as being a police informant. Del Rio took the job as a way to channel her grief about the loss of her daughter into something productive. In response to the vandalism, she has placed a picture of her daughter by her garage door as a makeshift memorial. Del Rio says she refuses to be intimidated by the people who vandalized her property. Police are investigating the incident.
Source: KTLA Website
— Mark Esposito, Guest Blogger
The Tea Party made lots of noise and woke the neighbors, but precious few in-roads into the political system. True, Marc Rubio and Rand Paul were big winners but each benefited from some peculiar circumstances. Rubio won in a three way race punctuated by former spurned Repub Governor Crist’s independent bid along with a Democratic challenger who won just enough to split the vote of the rational and give Rubio the nod. Rand benefited from the strong conservative sentiment in Kentucky and what Mark Twain best described this way: “When the end of the world comes, I want to be in Kentucky because it’s always twenty years behind the times.”
Other Party guests did not fair so well — even in a time of popular disenchantment with government and a bad economy. Unpopular Senator Harry Reid survived a bid from Sharon Angle of “there is no separation of church and state” fame. First Amendment scholar, former Wiccan, and Angle devotee, Christine O’Donnell, sank against Chris Coons by 18 points. Even in far off Alaska, Palin-approved candidate Joe Miller looks to be a loser in a three way race to a write-in candidate and incumbent, Lisa Murkowski.
How did that poster child for The Movement and likely 2012 Presidential candidate, Sarah Plain, do with her endorsements? Well, that sprinkling of Alaskan tea resulted in 33 loses and 27 wins. Not exactly the “Golden Touch.” All in all, the Tea Party can claim some measure of victory, but the win is less than satisfying. After the Party’s hangover, the realization will set in that “winning” requires “fixing” else-wise the fickle electorate will turn you out like yesterday’s newspaper. And that, my revolutionary friends, is the hardest tea to swallow of all.
–Mark Esposito, Guest Blogger
Just Imagine. The man who bites heads off birds and fronted for the hyper-heavy metal band, Black Sabbath, has bits of Neanderthal coursing though his veins. Ozzie Osbourne joins DNA co-discoverer James Watson and Harvard University professor Henry Louis Gates as persons having their entire genome sequenced and analyzed. Ozzie it seems has a little segment on his chromosome 10 that very likely traces back to a Neanderthal forebearer. Says the unflappable Ozzie, “”Given the swimming pools of booze I’ve guzzled over the years—not to mention all of the cocaine, morphine, sleeping pills, cough syrup, LSD, Rohypnol…you name it—there’s really no plausible medical reason why I should still be alive. Maybe my DNA could say why.” Brutish determination ,it seems, is the answer. I am taking up funds to get a similar DNA sequence done for Dick Cheney. Any ideas on his forebearers? Meanwhile here’s some Black Sabbath to tide you over:
Source: Scientific American
–Mark Esposito, Guest Blogger
Ah, the bloom is too soon off the marriage rose as far as some men are concerned! At least that’s how it would appear for Minchillo McLester who was married just three weeks ago. McLester’s wife Madison was found dead on the floor of their home. She had apparently been shot several times. McLester was taken into custody after witnesses told police that they saw a naked man walking in a nearby Atlanta park early yesterday morning.
The London-based Centre for Crime and Justice Studies is reporting on research suggesting alcohol is more dangerous to society than crack cocaine and heroin. Published in the British medical journal Lancet, a panel of experts evaluated the psychological and social problems associated with alcohol using a new scale. Alcohol received a score of 72 on a 100 scale besting the more well-known illegal culprits. Crack and Heroin were still the most dangerous drugs to individuals, however.
Irish pub owners were not impressed pointing out the study was co-authored by a Dr. Nutt, who also opined that horseback riding was more dangerous than ecstasy. Nutt rated ecstasy a “9” on his scale, by the way.
Pay no attention to this tea-totaling drivel there, JT. The Chablis Grands Cru tastes amazing while sitting along the Champs–Élysées.
Source: CNN
– Mark Esposito, Guest Blogger
A 22-year-old Nebraska man named Trevor Case suspected that his girlfriend Danielle Stallworth might be cheating on him. In order to elicit information from Stallworth, the mother of his child, Case decided to employ an “enhanced interrogation technique” on her. He waterboarded Stallworth to find out if she had been unfaithful!
Police in Lincoln, Nebraska, allege that Case bound Stallworth’s wrists and ankles, stuffed “hospital socks” in her mouth, and put a t-shirt over her head. Case then allegedly poured a pitcher of water over her head. When the victim felt she couldn’t breathe, she began “freaking out.”
Continue reading “Man Charged with Domestic Assault for Waterboarding Girlfriend”
Explorer, conqueror, and, to some, the carrier of syphilis back to Europe from the New World, Columbus’ reputation seemed set in stone for eternity. Now some nifty forensic archeology may have exonerated the Admiral of the Ocean Sea from responsibility for the scourge that was first documented in Europe two years after his return from the West Indies. Researchers digging in an old church cemetery in East London say they’ve discovered bodies from the 13th and 14th Centuries which show tell-tale signs of syphilis like rough patches on the limbs and skulls of the corpses. Bodies interred with the disease two centuries before Columbus’ voyage would seem like exciting proof to Anglo scientists. However, the Brits managed to contain themselves: “We’re confident that Christopher Columbus is simply not a feature of the emergence and timing of the disease in Europe,” Brian Connell of the Museum of London said.
Now all that we know for sure is that the Europeans gifted diseases like smallpox and measles to the native populations but got precious little in return, that little island at the mouth of the Hudson River notwithstanding. Vikings are now the chief suspects for bringing the epidemic.
Source: AOLNews
Mark Esposito, Guest Blogger
Edwin Fry, 73, is quite the dog lover. When his pet poodle, aptly named “Buddy Tough,” was nabbed by local police for running “at large,” Fry decided to pull his best Steve McQueen. Refusing to pay the enhanced fine of $100.00 due to Buddy’s repeat offense, Fry leaped aboard his riding mower and headed straight for the canine hoosegaw where the chain link was no match for the bolt-cutter wielding pet owner. Sadly, the police took a dim view of animal rescue– Fry-style– and arrested him on complaints of second-degree burglary, trespassing, and destruction of city property. He is also facing a misdemeanor charge for (insert drum roll)…. allowing an animal to run at large. Sadder still, Fry got his own pen and Buddy was euthanized.
On a happier note, this “Born Free” attitude is not limited to our shores. Australians love it too as we see here.
Mark Esposito, Guest Blogger
Source: WPOC 93.1 Website
There’s nothing like a little hysteria to get one’s heart pumping. Lately, we’ve seen people in our country who’ve been whipped into frenzies by the following things: the belief that Sharia law could be instituted in the United States, the proposed building of a Muslim cultural center not far from Ground Zero, and stories about Americans being beheaded in the Arizona desert. All this modern-day hysteria got me to thinking about the Salem witch trials, which took place here in my state more than three hundred years ago. It gave me the idea to write about Giles Corey. Corey was an elderly Massachusetts man who was accused of being a witch in March of 1692.
Here’s a poem by an unknown author that summarizes the story of Giles Corey:
THE MAN OF IRON
Giles Corey was a wizard strong, a stubborn wretch was he;
And fit was he to hang on high upon the locust tree.
So, when before the Magistrates for trial he did come,
He would no true confession make, but was completely dumb.
“Giles Corey,” said the Magistrate, “What hast thou here to plead
To those who now accuse thy sould of crime and horrid deed?”
Giles Corey he said not a word, no single word spoke he.
“Giles Corey,” said the Magistrate, “We’ll press it out of thee.”
They got them then a heavy beam, then laid it on his breast;
They loaded it with heavy stones, and hard upon him pressed.
“More weight,” now said this wretched man. “More weight!” again he cried;
And he did no confession make, but wickedly he died.
Continue reading “Giles Corey: An Iron Man Who Was a Victim of the Salem Witch Hysteria”
Since I am off to Paris in a few hours, I am posting this list a day early. Happy Halloween to everyone and good luck to our guest bloggers — Elaine, David, and Mark — who will be blogging from today until the 6th (and possibly the 7th if they have any material left!)
While some cities may be banning teenagers from trick or treating, Halloween remains the favorite holiday of not just of Christine O’Donnell but for all torts professors and personal injury lawyers. Few people know it was invented by Slipitus Fallus, an ancient Roman personal injury lawyer. Common carrier hay rides, lighting vegetables on fire, handing out foodstuffs without a permit . . . It’s the most wonderful day of the year. So, with no further ado, here is this year’s annual Spooky Torts list of actual cases from Halloween (with our past winners).
Continue reading “The Annual Halloween Special of Spooky Torts and Crimes”