43 thoughts on “Think Not Lest Ye Be Damned”

  1. OK; lets be clear on whose the real Satan here; I AM! Unfortunately most people dont admit or understand there is a little of Satan in them too. I contend its the X gene in All Men=Xy and Women=XX. But I bet this preacher would rather kill himself by falling on his own sword than ever admit:

    1) he was defeated by a woman,
    2) he was wrong for bearing false witness against Satan.
    3) he made all that stuff up so folks wouldnt know he didnt know that Jesus Christ put the “Burden” of Satan upon us. g about by
    4) that GOD would send Satan back as the queen of the South to judge men like him for their idle words.

  2. Wait . . . where are we going and why are we in this handbasket? – handcart for you purists.

    Seriously, what the hell would Satan want with free thinkers? Nothing but trouble if you ask me. That would be a divine punishment for him, stuck for all eternity with people who think for themselves and won’t mindlessly follow his commands.

    one last old joke:
    Jesus saves!
    Moses grabs the rebound in the slot, he shoots HE SCORES!

  3. For all ye godless folks:

    Top 15 Atheist Billboards
    [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Esl40E-pVPY&hl=en_US&fs=1&]

  4. Elaine,

    Just remember my motto: The only bad pun is the one I didn’t think up first.

    BIL,

    I had a rant ready about the thoughtless inclusion of myself in the group, until I saw I wasn’t included, so now I have to write a whole new one about being thoughtlessly excluded.

    “Find\Replace” is a great feature.

  5. A couple of years ago I saw a sign by a conservative megachurch in Michigan that said, “The Bible is All the Constitution We Need”

    No thinking, no laws, just blind obedience to those who say they speak for God ….

  6. Bound for hell, as well. See you all there. Looking forward to the good company.

    – A semi-regular

  7. No I think they just forgot a word. It is supposed to read “A Free Republic thinker is Satan’s slave”. It’s just a typo, of sorts.

  8. Wait, I’m confused. Is this a pro-Palin political stance by the church?

  9. BIL–

    “Elaine is tormenting the staff with puns.”

    Did you mean Satan’s staff–the hellfire and brimstone bunch who fan the fires down below with their sulfurous emissions?

    Yeah, I’ll make ’em groan! I know how to inflict PUNishment.

  10. Mike A,

    I bear to you this humble apology for thoughtlessly including you in a list of free thinkers.

    A most egregious transgression. 😀

  11. Just a few lost souls swimming in a fish bowl… Meet you all in hell 😀

  12. While I respect Buddha’s right to express his opinion, I strongly protest my inclusion in his pantheon of condemned free thinkers. I assure you that I am quite capable of being as thoughtless as the next person.

  13. A free thinker is Satan’s slave? I want to be the slave of fundamentalist religion, darn it. Like blondes, automatons have more fun, and the pay is better and the accommodations .. well they are just fantastic. Ask my other slaves: Falwell (dearly departed); Robertson; Swaggart; Haggard; and the list just never ends.

  14. I love this blog!
    I’ve got my hand basket; may I please come too!

    “Gideon”

    Gideon, what have you told us at all?
    Make a sound, come down off the wall
    Religion should appeal to hearts of the young
    Who are you? What have you become?

    Animal, come on, what does this remind you of?

    Truly, Truly we have become
    Hated and feared for something we don’t want
    Listen, listen
    Most of us believe that this is wrong!

  15. I remember a sermon title I saw advertised years ago, “An Open Mind Leads to Brainwashing”.

Comments are closed.