Iowa Sen. Charles Grassley has come up with the bailout for executives: suicide. Grassley suggested that AIG executives do the honorable thing and commit Seppuku. The problem is of course that ten of his colleagues immediately demanded $10 billion for the study of Seppuku techniques and the creation of Seppuku centers as part of the proposed second bailout bill.
Continue reading “The Ultimate Bailout: Senator Proposes Suicide Pact With Business”
Category: Bizarre
This may seem like a bit of an contradiction to some, but Texas legislators are sponsoring a bill to facilitate the creation of a master’s degree in Creation Science. While these degrees are traditionally called Divinity degrees, Texas politicians fighting against evolution theory want to help the Institute for Creation Research.
Continue reading “Texas Legislation To Facilitate the Creation of An Advanced Creation Science Degree”
For criminal defense attorneys, regional differences can often produce localized forms of practice. The attorney for Marcel Fournier, 19, has one such case in Burlington, Vermont. Fournier was arrested for bolting antlers on the head of a dead doe to conceal game violations.
Continue reading “Natural or Enhanced? Vermont Hunter Jailed for Shooting Doe and Then Bolting Antlers To Her Head”
Houston police and prosecutors are arresting people for potty-mouths. The Texans were shocked when New Yorker Abraham Urquizo, 35, used the “F-word” twice while arguing with his girlfriend at Salsa’s Mexican and Seafood Restaurant. They are clearly unaware that the word can be used as an adjective, noun, verb, adverb, participle, and a gerund in New York.
Continue reading “Don’t Mess With Texican English: Texas Police Arrested New Yorker For Potty Mouth”
Now, this should make for an interesting torts case. Oklahoma State Penitentiary moved prisoner, Paul Duran Jr., 23 (left), after he had a fight with another cellmate. They choose Jessie James Dalton (right), who not only has a name for crime but happens to be the very man that Duran testified against in a murder case (resulting in his being given a life sentence without parole). Dalton allegedly beat Duran to death within 15 minutes.
Continue reading “Oklahoma Prison Puts Inmate Into The Same Cell With The Murderer Who He Testified Against a Trial– And Is Promptly Beaten To Death”
It was only recently that many of us put away our Square Root Day decorations. Yet, it is now time to celebrate Pi day in all of its irrational glory. The irrational number is rounded off to 3.14, making March 14th the special day for all math geeks — and circle circumference fanatics.
Continue reading “HAPPY Pi DAY!!!”
Australian Glenn Phillip McGuire, 28, has pleaded guilty of possession of child pornography after downloading six images of cartoon characters from The Simpsons and Pokemon in sexual scenes.
Continue reading “Man Guilty of Possession of Child Pornography For Downloading Sexual Cartoons of Simpson and Pokemon Characters”
Orion Kent Mitchelle Stoltman, 19, of Tooele, Utah has some serious issues to work out. Stoltman has been arrested for burglarizing a family’s animal pen, stealing two pet goats, taking them to a local elementary school and beheading them on Halloween.
Continue reading “Utah Man Arrested for Goat Kidnappings and Beheadings”
Former Cook County Republican Chairman Gary Skoien, 55, is in the midst of a bizarre criminal case. He accused his wife, Eni Skoien, 36, with battery for allegedly beating him with her fists and an electric guitar. Police report that Skoien admitted that his wife found him in his children’s playroom with two prostitutes early Sunday morning.
Russell Wright and his company, Stoam Holdings has a novel ground to challenge the $12.6 million verdict against them. They have given the court proof that a juror posted messages on Twitter.com that show bias. The allegedly incriminating eight “tweets” of juror Johnathan Powell were sent to a micro-blogging Web site via his cellular phone.
Continue reading “Twit: “Juror Jonathan” Throws Verdict Into Doubt With Improper Tweets”
A funny thing happened to researchers on their way to the Roman forum, they found a 1700-Year-Old Rome joke book. While found in Roman, Philogelos (or Laughter Lover) is written in greek and contains 265 jokes. The greatest academic contribution is final proof that there has not been a new joke told in two centuries.
Continue reading “Two Centurions Go Into a Bar . . . Researchers Uncover 1700-Year-Old Roman Book of Jokes”
Clifton Bloomfield was perfect for the role in casting director David Córdova’s movie “Felon,” a violent prison film starring Steven Dorff and Val Kilmer. After all, he had already killed two people and was the ultimate method actor. Indeed, it was difficult to see where Bloomfield’s method acting ended and his actual murders began.
Continue reading “Method Acting: Felon Goes Hollywood Between Murders”
A San Francisco police union has accused William Ayers, co-founder of the Weather Underground, and his wife Bernardine Dohrn of a 1970 bombing that killed a sergeant and injured eight other officers.
Afghan courts have produced yet another example of its de-evolution into a medieval Sharia system. The country’s Supreme Court has upheld the 20-year-sentence of Parwez Kambakhsh for blasphemy. He was convicted of asking questions in a university class about women’s rights under Islam and downloading an article on equal rights for woman. We are about to send thousands of more troops into the country to preserve it from . . . radical Islamic influences.
Baptist Pastor Christopher P. Daniels,40, has been arrested for second-degree arson in the burning down of his own church in Belton, South Carolina.
Continue reading “South Carolina Pastor Charged in Burning of His Own Church”