You know those high-level negotiations with the Taliban in Afghanistan that have been touted by both the Afghan and U.S. governments? Well, it turns out that they are not so high level. In fact, the negotiator may not be with the Taliban at all. The man with whom we have been negotiated as “Mullah Akhtar Muhammad Mansour,” one of the most senior commanders in the Taliban movement, turns out to be a nutter from Pakistan who probably could not believe everyone was negotiating with him to design the new Afghanistan. To make this FUBAR complete, one Western official admits “we gave him a lot of money.”
Continue reading “Fubar in Kandahar: Afghan and American Officials Discover That They Have Been Negotiating With Imposter for Months”
Category: Religion
To the delight of civil libertarians and libertarians alike, the Canadian courts have been leading the world in dealing with conflicts between privacy principles and morality legislation. I am serving as an expert in the review of Canadian polygamy laws in British Columbia. In the meantime, the Ontario Superior Court may allow three prostitution laws to die this Saturday.
Continue reading “Prostitution May Become Legal This Saturday in Ontario”
Rev. Cedric Miller is best known as the pastor who ordered his flock to discontinue their Facebook accounts because they are avenues for sin and a “portal to infidelity.” It turns out Miller didn’t really need a portal . . . he didn’t have to leave the church for infidelity. Miller has admitted to having sexual relations with a church assistant, his assistant’s wife, and Miller’s wife — sometimes at the same time. Miller warned last week that Facebook could ruin your marriage. Who needs Facebook?
Continue reading “Cedric the Entertainer: Anti-Facebook Preacher Admits To Orgies and Infidelity With Church Members”
The latest Harry Potter movie is greeted by movie theaters as a record blockbuster and kids as the long-waited sequel. For one person, however, it is the start of the new season of demonic possessions. Father Thomas J. Euteneuer explained in an interview this week that Harry Potter has opened the gates of Hell for millions and triggered a spate of possessions that keep him busy.
Some of you may recall reading Professor Turley’s recent post about a Massachusetts priest who allegedly stole more than $80,000 from his parish to support his pornography habit. Well, there’s a new story about a priest in Spain who is alleged to have saved more than 20,000 pornographic images of children on his computer.
Overwhelmed by the demand for exorcisms, U.S. Roman Catholic bishops are putting out the word that “Exorcists Need Apply” and that training in Baltimore is being held today. Down to only six U.S. exorcists the “Good Shepherds” hope to raise that number to 122. Bishop Thomas Paprocki of Springfield, Illinois, thinks each parish should have their own Exorcist in residence. You might remember that Bishop Paprocki said, when asked about who was responsible for the sexual abuse crises in the Catholic Church, that “the scandal was at least in part influenced by the Devil’s taking advantage of the moral weaknesses and psychological instability and sickness of the pedophiliac priest-abusers.” Like my idol, comedian Flip Wilson, I see a pattern here — the Devil Made ’em Do It.
Continue reading “Careful What You Witch For: US Bishops Need More Exorcists”
I previously posted notice of my retention as a legal expert in the polygamy case before the British Columbia Supreme Court — a case that is being watched closely around the world. My office has received a number of requests for the affidavit, which I have been informed is now part of the public record and is linked below.
Continue reading “Turley Affidavit in Canadian Polygamy Case”
Indonesian Information Minister Tifatul Sembiring is in the midst of a political crisis over a handshake. Sembiring is a conservative Muslim who often blames natural disasters on a lack of morality and avoids any contact with females outside his family. Then it happened on camera. A smiling Sembiring shaking the hand of first lady Michele Obama. It is enough to send a religious nut into a fetal position. The result has been an insistence that Michele Obama was the hand aggressor — effectively grabbing his hand to his disgust and alarm. The pictures seems to belie the defense — showing a smiling Sembiring who appears to grab the First Lady’s hand.
The Iranian police has found another threat to the Islamic faith: rap music. The morals police has raided parties across Iran to nab kids who just want to play rap music. These teenagers have been meeting in abandoned buildings to listen to the music and dance.
Continue reading “Taking the Rap: Iranians Arrest Teenagers Across Country For Playing Rap Music and Using “Western Musical Instruments””
In Massachusetts, prosecutors are dealing with a bizarre case of a man who allegedly store $83,147 to pay for his pornography habit. What makes the case even more bizarre is that the victim was the St. John the Baptist Church and the alleged felon was its pastor, Rev. Keith LeBlanc.
Continue reading “Collared: Massachusetts Priest Accused of Stealing $83,000 To Support Porn Habit”
The British Columbia Supreme Court will be some hearing testimony on the criminalization of plural unions — an extremely important case with global ramifications. As has been my practice in past cases, I wanted to confirm my involvement in the case as a court-appointed expert on the legality of such criminal laws. Weeks ago, I was retained to submit written testimony on the right of consenting adults to plural unions under United States and international law.
Rev. Barry Lynn: What’s Wrong With ‘The Family’ And The National Prayer Breakfast
Continue reading “On Piety & Politics: A Video Post About the Separation of Church and State”
Wallace Benn, Bishop of Lewes, really riled some folks in England when he likened the debate over allowing female bishops to the “serious threat” of warfare posed by “someone” months before the beginning of World War II. Lewes was explaining his view of women bishops to a conference of conservative Anglicans when he told his audience: “I’m about to use an analogy, and I use it quite deliberately and carefully. And it slightly frightens me to use it, but I do think it’s where we are at.”
The bishop continued: “I feel very much increasingly that we’re in January of 1939. We need to be aware that there is real serious warfare just round the corner. It’s actually arrived in some places already. And we’re in a challenging and serious situation.”
Paris officials report that an 18-month-old girl fell seven stories from an apartment window into the waiting arms of a Good Samaritan. The child, who was briefly left unattended, fell from an open window. A young boy seeing the tragedy about to unfold alerted his father who made the circus catch. The passer-by was aided in his feat by two good hands and a cafe’ awning that caused the falling child to bound softly into his outstretched arms. The flying baby was pronounced in good health by a physician at the scene but whisked away to the hospital for observation.
Bernie McDaid, a man from Massachusetts, will be leading a rally outside the Vatican on Halloween. McDaid, who was an altar boy in his youth, joined a lawsuit against Cardinal Bernard Law and other officials of the Catholic Church in 2002. The suit alleged that McDaid and a number of other altar boys at St. James Church in Salem had been abused by the late Rev. Joseph Birmingham, a serial pedophile, in the late 1960s.
McDaid and Gary Bergeron, co-organizers of the rally, chose October 31st “because of its powerful symbolism: It is the day when Martin Luther nailed his 95 theses to a church door in Germany, an event that helped trigger the Protestant Reformation.”
Continue reading “Massachusetts Man to Lead Clergy Abuse Victims Rally Outside Vatican on Halloween”